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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 4h

i was trying to look up how old Homo erectus was but these are close enough

Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 5h

our local video store had a Cult Classics shelf and when i was a teen i'd just rent stuff from it at random. it ruled that they were like "here's a pile of stuff that we won't bother to separate by genre, just This Is For The Real Heads. Would You Like To Be A Real Head"
bsky.app/profile/poss...

Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · Dec 1

our local video store wouldnt rent R-rated movies to minors without a parental OK, so when I was 14 I asked my mom if she could do that so I could watch more of the Cult Classics shelf. She asked "what is it in these movies you want to see" and I was like "well I don't know. I haven't seen them yet"

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 16h

yes! whenever I encounter Breast Milk Fetishists online all i can think about is grimly, wearily attempting to rearrange the ziploc bags of pumped milk in the chest freezer in a way that will not accidentally nick one of corners of the bags while all my muscles feel full of ground glass and molasses

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 19h

recently i mentioned the Boris The Sprinkler album "Mega Anal" to a friend from punk scene days in high school, and he was like "hell yeah, great album," and then after a long nervous pause he was like "so, just wanna check, Reverend Nørb isn't like.. he didn't, become.. . is he still. how is he"

good hyuck, babe! @markpopham.bsky.social · 20h

a not great aspect of the 2020s is every now and then i'll remember a writer/actor/comedian/musician i haven't heard about in a while and i'll think "oh I wonder how they're doing.... really hope they haven't *directly to camera* TURNED EVIL"

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 19h

one time a college friend from NJ was working in NH for a summer and i gave her my phone number, and she was like "wait what's the area code," and i chuckled "oh my.. oh no.. you're up north now"

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 20h

i drive by "God's Girls" every time i go to the seacoast at Rye, NH, and every time i get thrown by the fact that it is not a strip club

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 23h

my kid came downstairs this morning and froze and said "you look different." i was like "yeah i cut my hair" and she said "WHEN" and i said "just now. when you were playing upstairs." she looked at me like she didnt quite believe me. whats your theory, man, I'm the evil Mirror Universe Papa?

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Reposted by Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer

THE GHOST OF ASAKO KISHI THROUGH A MEDIUM WHO IS AN INTERPRETER: @karenblackpilled.bsky.social · 1d

This stuff is always not only vague and laughable but presented so somberly. “Excuse me I saw you liking her posts but I think you should know she was extremely cavalier about the depiction of butch/femme dynamics in the Designing Women fan fiction community”

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

the best thing i can say about "Wood" is that the bouncy little funk guitar makes me think "oh i should go listen to Bobby Conn's Never Get Ahead instead"
www.youtube.com/watch?v=rm9d...

Bobby Conn- Never get Ahead

YouTube video by pubgoblin

www.youtube.com

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

today's news about the US government's role in your children's genitals is that the pedophile president found out what makes autism and wouldn't you know it, it turns out it's your children's genitals

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

bean distillation going so hard all the newest uwus tagging themselves as aquafaba

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

my kids got super into that cartoon kpop band, and now my 6-year-old is obsessed with K/DA, the cartoon kpop band from League Of Legends
youtu.be/UOxkGD8qRB4?...

K/DA - POP/STARS (ft. Madison Beer, (G)I-DLE, Jaira Burns) | Music Video - League of Legends

YouTube video by League of Legends

youtu.be

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

unfortunately the dude blocked me after my informative and helpful post

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

she took care of them herself with her standard method of holding her nose, but preceded and followed by her shaking her head ruefully at me and saying "I can't believe i allowed you to try that out on me"

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

just tried this on my hiccuping wife and after all three steps, it did not work. i am ready to fistfight this blogger

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

it does stand for Bolg; tolkien made this very clear in the silmarillion

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

smells pretty good, tasted okay from the siphoning, but needs a week or two of bottle conditioning before i pass final judgement! not even a huge fan of mead but Charlie Papazian is crazy about this recipe in Complete Joy Of Homebrewing, so I've been meaning to try this for like 20 years

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

a year and a month later:

prickly pear mead, bottled in mismatched swingtops

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 1d

wife got an extremely losing case that her client wouldnt plea on. i very gently was like, "my darling, i love you. you're so smart, hard-working, and such a good lawyer. but you are not winning this case. the loss will not be a reflection of your immense talent." anyway i just got word that she won

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 2d

i feel like that's a lot of my life already. like the last weekend my wife and i spent in nyc, i was like "oo Werckmeister Harmóniák is playing in 35 mm!" and she was like "right on, go enjoy it, i'm gonna go see my friend Ella, bye." i guess what i'm saying is Béla Tarr is sort of my "Walt Disney"

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 2d

i'd be fine with it except for how it would fuck with parenting if we had kids together bsky.app/profile/poss...

Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · Mar 30

wife is laughing to the point of tears because the kids are watching Wreck It Ralph 2, and when the characters go to the Disney themed world, my kid said "i wish Disney World was real!" and i immediately responded "yes, that would be fun, but it's just an imaginary movie scene"

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 2d

one weird take i saw when Zuckerberg lurched hard toward fascism was that it's because he started doing BJJ. i'm pretty sure it has more to do with the guy having billions and billions of dollars, effectively separating his life experience from that of almost every other human. not the grapplings

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Reposted by Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer

good hyuck, babe! @markpopham.bsky.social · 2d

of the moral conundrums you will be presented with, as an adult, "stop buying these specific children's toys" is like. the easiest possible

Jess O'Thomson @jessothomson.co.uk · 2d

It cannot be made clearer.

If you continue to support the Harry Potter franchise in any way, you are directly funding the removal of trans people's human rights in the UK.

JK Rowling pledges to keep up fight against SNP trans policies

Author vows to bankroll campaigners after Scottish government fails to pay group's legal fees in Supreme Court equality case

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Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer @possumacquainter.bsky.social · 2d

to OutKast’s "Dracula's Wedding":
🎵 oooh, antifa's girlfriend 🎵

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Reposted by Gregory Possum-Jumpscarer

Mike.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ @dumbmike.bsky.social · Jul 24

When it happens, you're probably not even going to learn about it directly before you feel it in the air. You'll just hear car horns and cheering in the streets. You'll feel confused, annoyed. You'll check your phone. Huh, 41 new texts.

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