Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
@soundingline.bsky.social
Fantasist. Bespoke Cusses. Rum Cove. Ring Guy. Orioles Fan. Cocktails and weightlifting, rarely at the same time. Opinions are my own. https://www.patreon.com/c/DanielMFord
Pinned
Advocate
Check out this great listen on Audible.com. "Omigosh! I've just found an author to put on my list of I've got to read everything they ever wrote! The Warden is a gem of the first order. Aelis is my he...
www.audible.com
ADVOCATE, Book 3 of THE WARDEN, narrated by the incredible @lindseydorcus.bsky.social is out in Audiobook today! www.audible.com/pd/Advocate-...
A simpler time. A better time.
Study: Average 19th-Century American Spent 93% Of Time Waving At Trains, Boats https://theonion.com/study-average-19th-century-american-spent-93-of-time-waving-at-trains-boats/
November 25, 2025 at 7:07 PM
A simpler time. A better time.
If I get to February and have to read Meoli use the phrase "raised the foor but not the ceiling" about the Orioles offseason 15 more times, I am gonna take four shits and die
November 25, 2025 at 5:27 PM
If I get to February and have to read Meoli use the phrase "raised the foor but not the ceiling" about the Orioles offseason 15 more times, I am gonna take four shits and die
If someone was using AI to come up with conversation prompts, prayers, or toasts, I'd leave the party.
This is so soulless, I can't stand it. We have BRAINS. We can USE THEM.
November 25, 2025 at 4:48 PM
If someone was using AI to come up with conversation prompts, prayers, or toasts, I'd leave the party.
i would like everyone at the warehouse to stop edging to player valuation spreadsheets and acquire some fucking starting pitching already
November 25, 2025 at 4:44 PM
i would like everyone at the warehouse to stop edging to player valuation spreadsheets and acquire some fucking starting pitching already
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
Companions of Christmas: MERCURIUS ABU-SIFIN
Today (November 25) is the feast day of this Scythian-Romano soldier saint, who wields two swords: one with which to fight evil men, the other, given to him by the Archangel Michael, with which to fight demons, evil spirits, and monsters. 1/
Today (November 25) is the feast day of this Scythian-Romano soldier saint, who wields two swords: one with which to fight evil men, the other, given to him by the Archangel Michael, with which to fight demons, evil spirits, and monsters. 1/
November 25, 2025 at 3:48 PM
Companions of Christmas: MERCURIUS ABU-SIFIN
Today (November 25) is the feast day of this Scythian-Romano soldier saint, who wields two swords: one with which to fight evil men, the other, given to him by the Archangel Michael, with which to fight demons, evil spirits, and monsters. 1/
Today (November 25) is the feast day of this Scythian-Romano soldier saint, who wields two swords: one with which to fight evil men, the other, given to him by the Archangel Michael, with which to fight demons, evil spirits, and monsters. 1/
My love of making lists is giving me the urge to sit down with the PHB and figure out the costs of putting different kinds of units of troops into the field (5e should've done something with high-level keep and army-building play)
November 25, 2025 at 3:38 PM
My love of making lists is giving me the urge to sit down with the PHB and figure out the costs of putting different kinds of units of troops into the field (5e should've done something with high-level keep and army-building play)
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
The good news: the president has pardoned the turkey.
The bad news: two hours later the turkey was arrested for running a ponzi scheme and committing acts of gross sexual imposition.
The bad news: two hours later the turkey was arrested for running a ponzi scheme and committing acts of gross sexual imposition.
November 25, 2025 at 1:38 PM
The good news: the president has pardoned the turkey.
The bad news: two hours later the turkey was arrested for running a ponzi scheme and committing acts of gross sexual imposition.
The bad news: two hours later the turkey was arrested for running a ponzi scheme and committing acts of gross sexual imposition.
That should be like a 2 game suspension. At least.
November 25, 2025 at 1:52 PM
That should be like a 2 game suspension. At least.
I blocked that fake failing up journalist's name so I wouldn't have to see more bullshit about her failing up and NOW you people are spelling her name differently (incorrectly) to be CUTE and also to get around mutes, aren't you? Fuck you. Blocked, whoever you are.
November 25, 2025 at 1:45 PM
I blocked that fake failing up journalist's name so I wouldn't have to see more bullshit about her failing up and NOW you people are spelling her name differently (incorrectly) to be CUTE and also to get around mutes, aren't you? Fuck you. Blocked, whoever you are.
this is legally binding right? we show this to Scott Boras he's got NO CASE!
November 25, 2025 at 1:44 PM
this is legally binding right? we show this to Scott Boras he's got NO CASE!
I love trying to update my payment info on something, filling in all the credit card info correctly, then clicking update and watching nothing happen. It is good, to me. Thank you for this experience, AAA.
November 25, 2025 at 1:13 PM
I love trying to update my payment info on something, filling in all the credit card info correctly, then clicking update and watching nothing happen. It is good, to me. Thank you for this experience, AAA.
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
Four years ago today we had to say goodbye to the sweetest, happiest, and dumbest cat who ever lived. We miss you Hector, aka God’s Perfect Idiot
November 24, 2025 at 10:49 PM
Four years ago today we had to say goodbye to the sweetest, happiest, and dumbest cat who ever lived. We miss you Hector, aka God’s Perfect Idiot
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
Today is a good day to sign Dylan Cease
November 25, 2025 at 11:55 AM
Today is a good day to sign Dylan Cease
World War One plz
I figure Ken Burns has one, maybe two big documentary series in him before he fully retires. What do you think they should be? My votes include Football, Hip-Hop, World War 1, Reconstruction (though Skip Gates did this one well), Iraq/Afghanistan, 19th Century Expansionism.
November 25, 2025 at 1:05 AM
World War One plz
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
like this Graham Norton episode. Judi Dench recites Shakespeare's Sonnet 29 off the top of her dome. Schwarzenegger - a man not known for appreciating poetry, much less English poetry - is rapt. He's locked in. youtu.be/t_X1dbO-quI?...
Dame Judi Dench stuns everyone with her Shakespeare sonnet reading | The Graham Norton Show - BBC
YouTube video by BBC
youtu.be
November 24, 2025 at 10:12 PM
like this Graham Norton episode. Judi Dench recites Shakespeare's Sonnet 29 off the top of her dome. Schwarzenegger - a man not known for appreciating poetry, much less English poetry - is rapt. He's locked in. youtu.be/t_X1dbO-quI?...
Four years ago today we had to say goodbye to the sweetest, happiest, and dumbest cat who ever lived. We miss you Hector, aka God’s Perfect Idiot
November 24, 2025 at 10:49 PM
Four years ago today we had to say goodbye to the sweetest, happiest, and dumbest cat who ever lived. We miss you Hector, aka God’s Perfect Idiot
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
Go through and like your MLB teams to have a label placed on your account!
(Orioles Sky, get on this! Let’s really show how much of a presence we have here. Maybe that will help convince the team to start using the account!)
(Orioles Sky, get on this! Let’s really show how much of a presence we have here. Maybe that will help convince the team to start using the account!)
Like the replies to this post to receive labels for MLB teams.
November 24, 2025 at 10:22 PM
Go through and like your MLB teams to have a label placed on your account!
(Orioles Sky, get on this! Let’s really show how much of a presence we have here. Maybe that will help convince the team to start using the account!)
(Orioles Sky, get on this! Let’s really show how much of a presence we have here. Maybe that will help convince the team to start using the account!)
FINE!
Return of the Jedi
The Last Jedi
Rogue One
Star Wars
Empire
TFA
TROS
Solo
whatever order you want the prequels in IDC
Return of the Jedi
The Last Jedi
Rogue One
Star Wars
Empire
TFA
TROS
Solo
whatever order you want the prequels in IDC
November 24, 2025 at 10:12 PM
FINE!
Return of the Jedi
The Last Jedi
Rogue One
Star Wars
Empire
TFA
TROS
Solo
whatever order you want the prequels in IDC
Return of the Jedi
The Last Jedi
Rogue One
Star Wars
Empire
TFA
TROS
Solo
whatever order you want the prequels in IDC
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
Dear god, protect me from the Star Wars opinions of others.
November 24, 2025 at 8:56 PM
Dear god, protect me from the Star Wars opinions of others.
Rogue One slander on the timeline? I won't have it.
November 24, 2025 at 8:33 PM
Rogue One slander on the timeline? I won't have it.
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
Re: the bullshit. There's a reason I stopped publishing and marketing this year. Between these sites, the scrapers, and collapsing sales, publishing a book these days mostly just feels like getting spat at in the face.
I love the readers who support me, but man, fuck the rest of it.
I love the readers who support me, but man, fuck the rest of it.
November 24, 2025 at 5:00 PM
Re: the bullshit. There's a reason I stopped publishing and marketing this year. Between these sites, the scrapers, and collapsing sales, publishing a book these days mostly just feels like getting spat at in the face.
I love the readers who support me, but man, fuck the rest of it.
I love the readers who support me, but man, fuck the rest of it.
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
"Don't bury an acorn you can't scurry out on in a second if you feel a car is coming."
November 24, 2025 at 4:45 PM
"Don't bury an acorn you can't scurry out on in a second if you feel a car is coming."
Reposted by Dan "Turkey is Good, You Cretins" Ford
Over the weekend at Patreon I finally posted a new Skulls & Screens, which is me combing through my collection of old fantasy, horror, and sci-fi anthologies/magazines I pick up at flea markets. If you're a subscriber, you're getting this before anyone else.
SKULLS & SCREENS - "Editorial; Teaching Science Fiction" | Costa Koutsoutis
Get more from Costa Koutsoutis on Patreon
www.patreon.com
November 24, 2025 at 4:13 PM
Over the weekend at Patreon I finally posted a new Skulls & Screens, which is me combing through my collection of old fantasy, horror, and sci-fi anthologies/magazines I pick up at flea markets. If you're a subscriber, you're getting this before anyone else.
Ham doesn't belong on a Thanksgiving table.
with charity and goodwill, i must here part ways with rolls.
November 24, 2025 at 3:53 PM
Ham doesn't belong on a Thanksgiving table.