Stephen Uitti he/him/it/they/hey-you
@suitti.bsky.social
Amateur astronomer - Astronomy for Everyone show since 2009 https://www.youtube.com/c/astronomyforeveryone
Writing a book. Have dogs.
Tell jokes - I used to tell dad jokes. Sometimes he'd laugh.
Something with computers for a living.
I don't really do DMs.
Writing a book. Have dogs.
Tell jokes - I used to tell dad jokes. Sometimes he'd laugh.
Something with computers for a living.
I don't really do DMs.
Pinned
I'm giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I'm giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.
#joke
#joke
The wolf pack had a treat mixed in with dinner today because it's Black Friday, and something like half of the wolf pack is black. (We're not prejudiced. In fact, though we knew that there is a prejudice against black cats, had no idea that there is also a prejudice against black dogs. Seriously?)
November 28, 2025 at 9:17 PM
The wolf pack had a treat mixed in with dinner today because it's Black Friday, and something like half of the wolf pack is black. (We're not prejudiced. In fact, though we knew that there is a prejudice against black cats, had no idea that there is also a prejudice against black dogs. Seriously?)
This. Is. Funny.
November 28, 2025 at 9:02 PM
This. Is. Funny.
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a pint. The second one, half a pint. Then a quarter, then an eight. The barman hands over 2 pints and say, "You mathematicians, you don't know your limits."
#joke
#joke
November 28, 2025 at 7:44 PM
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a pint. The second one, half a pint. Then a quarter, then an eight. The barman hands over 2 pints and say, "You mathematicians, you don't know your limits."
#joke
#joke
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
#joke
At least one bird watching organization suggests "...shoot two birds with one picture".
#joke
At least one bird watching organization suggests "...shoot two birds with one picture".
November 28, 2025 at 7:39 PM
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
#joke
At least one bird watching organization suggests "...shoot two birds with one picture".
#joke
At least one bird watching organization suggests "...shoot two birds with one picture".
Wolf pack got freezing cold walks with winter coats & turkey dinner. That's Thanksgiving here. We got cake with super sugary frosting.
November 27, 2025 at 10:07 PM
Wolf pack got freezing cold walks with winter coats & turkey dinner. That's Thanksgiving here. We got cake with super sugary frosting.
Reposted by Stephen Uitti he/him/it/they/hey-you
His favorite show is on. The National Dog Show. He waits all year for this.
November 27, 2025 at 5:09 PM
His favorite show is on. The National Dog Show. He waits all year for this.
Reposted by Stephen Uitti he/him/it/they/hey-you
Reposted by Stephen Uitti he/him/it/they/hey-you
ICE DETAINED MARILYN. Fuck these people. www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news...
‘Northern Exposure’ actor gave ICE agents in Redmond her tribal ID. They called it ‘fake,’ she says
Indigenous actor Elaine Miles of "Northern Exposure" was detained by ICE at a Redmond bus stop. When she showed them her Tribal ID, they told her it was fake.
www.seattletimes.com
November 27, 2025 at 4:35 PM
ICE DETAINED MARILYN. Fuck these people. www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news...
Yesterday Adam said to his wife, "Happy Thanksgiving Eve", but today he said "Happy Thanksgiving, Eve."
November 27, 2025 at 7:40 PM
Yesterday Adam said to his wife, "Happy Thanksgiving Eve", but today he said "Happy Thanksgiving, Eve."
Can't focus today. Morning orange juice says "Not from concentrate".
November 27, 2025 at 5:00 PM
Can't focus today. Morning orange juice says "Not from concentrate".
Have long advocated talking about politics over Thanksgiving dinner to save money on holiday shopping.
Here are some specific talking points.
substack.com/@borowitzrep...
Here are some specific talking points.
substack.com/@borowitzrep...
Andy Borowitz (@borowitzreport)
Stuck with MAGA relatives around the table today? Gaslight them by pretending you’re a convert to their movement! Just slip these surefire talking points into the conversation:
I’m more grateful for ...
substack.com
November 27, 2025 at 4:33 PM
Have long advocated talking about politics over Thanksgiving dinner to save money on holiday shopping.
Here are some specific talking points.
substack.com/@borowitzrep...
Here are some specific talking points.
substack.com/@borowitzrep...
The Fani Willis case isn't about Fani Willis. It's about Trump. Please stay focused.
Seems like most (esp. "journalists") criticizing Fani Willis for using RICO or getting disqualified are glossing over the facts that she elicited several guilty pleas from defendants and was replaced by a MAGA prosecutor who is the one requesting the dismissal. Are journalists really this ignorant?
November 27, 2025 at 4:26 PM
The Fani Willis case isn't about Fani Willis. It's about Trump. Please stay focused.
Reposted by Stephen Uitti he/him/it/they/hey-you
If you had questions about Trump's "assassination attempts" wait until you see info about the guy who shot the National Guard troops. He was a CIA trained killer who worked in an elite unit in Afghanistan known for killing civilians. Now he travelled from Wash state to DC to shoot random troops 🤔
November 27, 2025 at 4:07 PM
If you had questions about Trump's "assassination attempts" wait until you see info about the guy who shot the National Guard troops. He was a CIA trained killer who worked in an elite unit in Afghanistan known for killing civilians. Now he travelled from Wash state to DC to shoot random troops 🤔
November 27, 2025 at 4:15 PM
Is it a liquid or a gas?
November 27, 2025 at 3:50 PM
Is it a liquid or a gas?
Three guys stranded on a desert island find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says: "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were back here."
#joke
#joke
November 27, 2025 at 3:41 PM
Three guys stranded on a desert island find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says: "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were back here."
#joke
#joke