A Dorkus Malorkus
@dorkusmalorkus.bsky.social
what a terrible day to know how to read
Reposted by A Dorkus Malorkus
One guy tried, unsuccessfully, to blow up a plane with a bomb in his sneakers, and everybody had to take off their shoes at the airport for the next 20 years.
Chatbots have a collective body count equal to Richard "The Night Stalker" Ramirez, and they're trying to put them in schools.
Chatbots have a collective body count equal to Richard "The Night Stalker" Ramirez, and they're trying to put them in schools.
30 years ago they were like we have to ban song lyrics for the children but it’s full steam ahead for the here’s how to do drugs until you die machine
“ChatGPT started coaching Sam on how to take drugs, recover from them and plan further binges. It gave him specific doses of illegal substances, and in one chat, it wrote, ‘Hell yes—let’s go full trippy mode’”
www.sfgate.com/tech/article...
www.sfgate.com/tech/article...
January 6, 2026 at 1:37 AM
One guy tried, unsuccessfully, to blow up a plane with a bomb in his sneakers, and everybody had to take off their shoes at the airport for the next 20 years.
Chatbots have a collective body count equal to Richard "The Night Stalker" Ramirez, and they're trying to put them in schools.
Chatbots have a collective body count equal to Richard "The Night Stalker" Ramirez, and they're trying to put them in schools.
been trying to read every inhumans comic and i'm up to civil war ii and it actually started better than i remembered but it gets so dumb so fast that i think i got whiplash
January 5, 2026 at 1:55 AM
been trying to read every inhumans comic and i'm up to civil war ii and it actually started better than i remembered but it gets so dumb so fast that i think i got whiplash
Reposted by A Dorkus Malorkus
mother-in-law put on the 1st tobey maguire spider-man movie but she's doing that thing where she plays with the volume like it's a fidget toy so i might have to leave the room before i say something i shouldn't
January 4, 2026 at 2:15 AM
mother-in-law put on the 1st tobey maguire spider-man movie but she's doing that thing where she plays with the volume like it's a fidget toy so i might have to leave the room before i say something i shouldn't
whenever a new inhumans comic comes out and the characters are all like "who could be behind this evil plot?"
January 4, 2026 at 12:28 AM
whenever a new inhumans comic comes out and the characters are all like "who could be behind this evil plot?"
13 yo asked me to raise the age restrictions on his netflix profile so he could watch the Flash tv show and now I have to explain that I don't want him watching those kinds of shows (bad ones)
January 2, 2026 at 2:29 PM
13 yo asked me to raise the age restrictions on his netflix profile so he could watch the Flash tv show and now I have to explain that I don't want him watching those kinds of shows (bad ones)
my MIL asked my wife the other day to show her how to use a stationary cycling thing she bought.
wife: oh, it's really easy, you just-
MIL, cutting her off: you know i don't understand this shit. you'll have to show me.
but it's literally just put your feet on it and start cycling. nothing more.
wife: oh, it's really easy, you just-
MIL, cutting her off: you know i don't understand this shit. you'll have to show me.
but it's literally just put your feet on it and start cycling. nothing more.
January 1, 2026 at 9:14 PM
my MIL asked my wife the other day to show her how to use a stationary cycling thing she bought.
wife: oh, it's really easy, you just-
MIL, cutting her off: you know i don't understand this shit. you'll have to show me.
but it's literally just put your feet on it and start cycling. nothing more.
wife: oh, it's really easy, you just-
MIL, cutting her off: you know i don't understand this shit. you'll have to show me.
but it's literally just put your feet on it and start cycling. nothing more.
got off work early today. got home and my wife was napping. i knew she had prepped dinner so I checked the recipe for cooking instructions, picked a time about 2 hours ahead of when we would usually eat, and started preheating the oven about 30 min ahead of that. put the food in the oven.
December 31, 2025 at 10:48 PM
got off work early today. got home and my wife was napping. i knew she had prepped dinner so I checked the recipe for cooking instructions, picked a time about 2 hours ahead of when we would usually eat, and started preheating the oven about 30 min ahead of that. put the food in the oven.
Reposted by A Dorkus Malorkus
TONIGHT ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW!
The UWF’s SATANIC PANIC!!!
The UWF’s SATANIC PANIC!!!
December 31, 2025 at 4:56 PM
TONIGHT ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW!
The UWF’s SATANIC PANIC!!!
The UWF’s SATANIC PANIC!!!
watching the episode of Simpsons with elon musk in it and he's like "i don't engage in conversation with people unless they stimulate me intellectually" and of course this was before he disproved that by spending 19 hours every day conversing with the dumbest people in the world
December 28, 2025 at 11:47 PM
watching the episode of Simpsons with elon musk in it and he's like "i don't engage in conversation with people unless they stimulate me intellectually" and of course this was before he disproved that by spending 19 hours every day conversing with the dumbest people in the world
finally watched Wake Up Dead Man yesterday and now I get why people aren't talking about it as much as the first two
December 27, 2025 at 8:42 PM
finally watched Wake Up Dead Man yesterday and now I get why people aren't talking about it as much as the first two
my dad wanted the Mr. Bean dvd collection for x-mas so we're watching some of it now and i'm not saying it's not funny but it feels like the basic premise is that he's a high-functioning autistic that we're supposed to laugh at for being 'weird'
December 27, 2025 at 1:39 AM
my dad wanted the Mr. Bean dvd collection for x-mas so we're watching some of it now and i'm not saying it's not funny but it feels like the basic premise is that he's a high-functioning autistic that we're supposed to laugh at for being 'weird'
Reposted by A Dorkus Malorkus
WB: What do you have planned for Batman 2?
Tim Burton: We open on a newborn baby boy
WB: Aww
TB: No. The baby is ugly. He kills and eats a house cat while it's still alive. His parents try to kill him in his crib, but to Gotham's woe, they fail
WB: ...
TB: Also it's a Christmas movie
Tim Burton: We open on a newborn baby boy
WB: Aww
TB: No. The baby is ugly. He kills and eats a house cat while it's still alive. His parents try to kill him in his crib, but to Gotham's woe, they fail
WB: ...
TB: Also it's a Christmas movie
December 24, 2025 at 4:44 AM
WB: What do you have planned for Batman 2?
Tim Burton: We open on a newborn baby boy
WB: Aww
TB: No. The baby is ugly. He kills and eats a house cat while it's still alive. His parents try to kill him in his crib, but to Gotham's woe, they fail
WB: ...
TB: Also it's a Christmas movie
Tim Burton: We open on a newborn baby boy
WB: Aww
TB: No. The baby is ugly. He kills and eats a house cat while it's still alive. His parents try to kill him in his crib, but to Gotham's woe, they fail
WB: ...
TB: Also it's a Christmas movie
The Biden DOJ didn't prosecute all of the 1st Trump admins obvious crimes or the Epstein stuff because it would have been inappropriate for them to direct the DOJ and look like they were targeting political enemies and now the 2nd Trump White House is literally running the DOJ twitter account.
Gotta say, as a survivor, I’m not super loving this thing where the Department of Justice is running a cover-up of evidence the President sexually abused minors.
December 24, 2025 at 4:32 PM
The Biden DOJ didn't prosecute all of the 1st Trump admins obvious crimes or the Epstein stuff because it would have been inappropriate for them to direct the DOJ and look like they were targeting political enemies and now the 2nd Trump White House is literally running the DOJ twitter account.
i like when xmas songs do the like "fa la la la la" or "pa rum pa pum pum" or everyone's favorite part of Wonderful Christmastime the "DING DONG DING DONG DING DONG DING DONG"
December 24, 2025 at 12:32 AM
i like when xmas songs do the like "fa la la la la" or "pa rum pa pum pum" or everyone's favorite part of Wonderful Christmastime the "DING DONG DING DONG DING DONG DING DONG"
did secret Santa at work and got this little guy. Pretty cool.
December 23, 2025 at 3:29 PM
did secret Santa at work and got this little guy. Pretty cool.
Reposted by A Dorkus Malorkus
Of course, its full name is eggagar nogagon
December 23, 2025 at 3:23 AM
Of course, its full name is eggagar nogagon
Ladies and gentlemen... The Beetles!
December 21, 2025 at 7:40 PM
Ladies and gentlemen... The Beetles!
Reposted by A Dorkus Malorkus
this is a Canadian petition to uphold charter rights for transgender and minority communities
if youre Canadian, please sign it. if youre not Canadian, please share it.
www.ourcommons.ca/petitions/en...
if youre Canadian, please sign it. if youre not Canadian, please share it.
www.ourcommons.ca/petitions/en...
December 20, 2025 at 3:20 AM
this is a Canadian petition to uphold charter rights for transgender and minority communities
if youre Canadian, please sign it. if youre not Canadian, please share it.
www.ourcommons.ca/petitions/en...
if youre Canadian, please sign it. if youre not Canadian, please share it.
www.ourcommons.ca/petitions/en...
Reposted by A Dorkus Malorkus
If you're not trans, I don't think I can fully explain how important this is.
It's so powerful that one of the most circulated science media publications in the world has come out and said "trans children are real and providing transition care improves their lives." That's groundbreaking.
It's so powerful that one of the most circulated science media publications in the world has come out and said "trans children are real and providing transition care improves their lives." That's groundbreaking.
The name "Popular Science" doesn't mean we shift our coverage depending on public opinion. It means we cover relevant subjects that are rigorously researched, reliable, and grounded in reality.
And trans lives are grounded in reality.
We see y'all. No matter what.
www.popsci.com/science/tran...
And trans lives are grounded in reality.
We see y'all. No matter what.
www.popsci.com/science/tran...
First-of-a-kind study shows encouraging data for trans kids who socially transition
Ninety-four percent of participants in a new study stood firm in their trans identity after five years, and "detransitioning" is rare.
www.popsci.com
December 19, 2025 at 6:58 PM
If you're not trans, I don't think I can fully explain how important this is.
It's so powerful that one of the most circulated science media publications in the world has come out and said "trans children are real and providing transition care improves their lives." That's groundbreaking.
It's so powerful that one of the most circulated science media publications in the world has come out and said "trans children are real and providing transition care improves their lives." That's groundbreaking.
Reposted by A Dorkus Malorkus
Damn, Canadian Tire. You couldn’t find a CANADIAN sticker company that makes Canada flag stickers?!
December 16, 2025 at 12:54 AM
Damn, Canadian Tire. You couldn’t find a CANADIAN sticker company that makes Canada flag stickers?!
19. AOL never really caught on in Canada.
Show your age
17 (have never used a fax machine, a record player, or a phone booth)
17 (have never used a fax machine, a record player, or a phone booth)
December 16, 2025 at 4:30 AM
19. AOL never really caught on in Canada.
tried to watch a movie with the mother-in-law but she's changing the volume at least once every 5-10 seconds. she just accidentally muted it. don't think she has any clue what she's doing but i can't stand it.
December 14, 2025 at 12:25 AM
tried to watch a movie with the mother-in-law but she's changing the volume at least once every 5-10 seconds. she just accidentally muted it. don't think she has any clue what she's doing but i can't stand it.
me to my wife: your mom surprised me the other day when she washed out all those old oil lanterns she wants to keep by herself instead of asking one of us to do it. that was nice.
wife: you know she poured all the old oil down the sink, right?
me: ... fuck.
wife: you know she poured all the old oil down the sink, right?
me: ... fuck.
December 13, 2025 at 1:59 AM
me to my wife: your mom surprised me the other day when she washed out all those old oil lanterns she wants to keep by herself instead of asking one of us to do it. that was nice.
wife: you know she poured all the old oil down the sink, right?
me: ... fuck.
wife: you know she poured all the old oil down the sink, right?
me: ... fuck.