@keefetq.bsky.social
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Y’all might not appreciate it, but it took him 87 moves and 14 hours to get here
December 26, 2025 at 12:48 PM
Y’all might not appreciate it, but it took him 87 moves and 14 hours to get here
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Will Arnett was on Conan and told a story about how Conan dealt with the death of his parents by accusing Jason Bateman of killing them. It’s so funny.
December 9, 2025 at 5:35 PM
Will Arnett was on Conan and told a story about how Conan dealt with the death of his parents by accusing Jason Bateman of killing them. It’s so funny.
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First Secretary of Defense you could defeat by painting a tunnel on the side of a boulder.
November 25, 2025 at 1:55 PM
First Secretary of Defense you could defeat by painting a tunnel on the side of a boulder.
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TRUMP: and this Daniel, he went into the den?
MAMDANI: The lion's den, yes
TRUMP: surely they ate him
MAMDANI: Here's the part where it gets a little Broadway: they didn't
TRUMP: Unbelievable
MAMDANI: The lion's den, yes
TRUMP: surely they ate him
MAMDANI: Here's the part where it gets a little Broadway: they didn't
TRUMP: Unbelievable
November 21, 2025 at 9:41 PM
TRUMP: and this Daniel, he went into the den?
MAMDANI: The lion's den, yes
TRUMP: surely they ate him
MAMDANI: Here's the part where it gets a little Broadway: they didn't
TRUMP: Unbelievable
MAMDANI: The lion's den, yes
TRUMP: surely they ate him
MAMDANI: Here's the part where it gets a little Broadway: they didn't
TRUMP: Unbelievable
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Mike Johnson: ‘My Christian Faith Is More About Not Jacking Off Than Feeding The Poor’
November 3, 2025 at 10:30 PM
Mike Johnson: ‘My Christian Faith Is More About Not Jacking Off Than Feeding The Poor’
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When I say I don't want to have kids but I still want to be involved in their lives, this is what I mean
November 1, 2025 at 2:22 PM
When I say I don't want to have kids but I still want to be involved in their lives, this is what I mean
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It’s been so long since the Blue Jays won the World Series that the last time it happened the President was born in 1946 and had ties to Jeffrey Epstein.
October 30, 2025 at 2:07 AM
It’s been so long since the Blue Jays won the World Series that the last time it happened the President was born in 1946 and had ties to Jeffrey Epstein.
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Trump Spends Entire U.K. Trip Trying To Figure Out Where He Knows Prince Andrew From
Trump Spends Entire U.K. Trip Trying To Figure Out Where He Knows Prince Andrew From
LONDON—Claiming that he recognized the member of the royal family, but his memory was hazy, President Donald Trump has spent his entire trip to the U.K. trying to figure out where he knows Prince Andr...
theonion.com
September 18, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Trump Spends Entire U.K. Trip Trying To Figure Out Where He Knows Prince Andrew From
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JD Vance Booed By Own Reflection In Mirror https://theonion.com/jd-vance-booed-by-own-reflection-in-mirror/
September 15, 2025 at 8:24 PM
JD Vance Booed By Own Reflection In Mirror https://theonion.com/jd-vance-booed-by-own-reflection-in-mirror/
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what a humiliating way for don jr. to find out his dad sends birthday cards.
September 8, 2025 at 9:21 PM
what a humiliating way for don jr. to find out his dad sends birthday cards.
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JD Vance Booed By Own Reflection In Mirror theonion.com/jd-vanc...
August 14, 2025 at 7:30 PM
JD Vance Booed By Own Reflection In Mirror theonion.com/jd-vanc...
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Stephen Miller Tears Up As Son Says First 14 Words
August 14, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Stephen Miller Tears Up As Son Says First 14 Words
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me: what kind of animal is that
tour guide: alaskan otter
me: ok, let me know what he says
tour guide: alaskan otter
me: ok, let me know what he says
January 28, 2025 at 9:14 PM
me: what kind of animal is that
tour guide: alaskan otter
me: ok, let me know what he says
tour guide: alaskan otter
me: ok, let me know what he says
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Changing the stickers I put on Teslas from “Elon Musk is a Nazi” to “This is the car Chris Cillizza drives”
May 29, 2025 at 12:02 AM
Changing the stickers I put on Teslas from “Elon Musk is a Nazi” to “This is the car Chris Cillizza drives”
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FEMA Chief Confused By Wind
theonion.com/fema-ch...
theonion.com/fema-ch...
June 5, 2025 at 9:20 PM
FEMA Chief Confused By Wind
theonion.com/fema-ch...
theonion.com/fema-ch...
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if the wheels had come off this thing any faster it'd be a Cybertruck
June 5, 2025 at 8:21 PM
if the wheels had come off this thing any faster it'd be a Cybertruck
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That’s the Chicago way. He brings leavened bread, you bring unleavened bread. He brings justification through faith alone, you bring justification through faith and works.
May 8, 2025 at 5:23 PM
That’s the Chicago way. He brings leavened bread, you bring unleavened bread. He brings justification through faith alone, you bring justification through faith and works.
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the New Pope says he's from Chicago but he's *actually* from Naperville
May 8, 2025 at 5:19 PM
the New Pope says he's from Chicago but he's *actually* from Naperville
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also you all need to see this, because this is something I don't think *anybody* could predict for where this ad goes
May 6, 2025 at 1:17 PM
also you all need to see this, because this is something I don't think *anybody* could predict for where this ad goes
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At this rate MAGA will only be able to afford to rent the libs.
April 7, 2025 at 2:29 PM
At this rate MAGA will only be able to afford to rent the libs.
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At least now I understand how he bankrupted a casino
April 3, 2025 at 2:07 AM
At least now I understand how he bankrupted a casino
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Every review of AI is like: This isn’t very useful and it makes it harder to do simple tasks than if I just did it myself. Riddled with errors. Can’t see anyone using this. I feel stupider having tried this. That said I believe it will soon make human cognition redundant and eradicate us all.
February 6, 2025 at 3:17 PM
Every review of AI is like: This isn’t very useful and it makes it harder to do simple tasks than if I just did it myself. Riddled with errors. Can’t see anyone using this. I feel stupider having tried this. That said I believe it will soon make human cognition redundant and eradicate us all.
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When I was a Hill staffer in 2009, a Dem trifecta was trying to pass universal healthcare. In response, Senate GOP released a memo detailing all of the tactics they in the minority could use to delay the effort as much as possible. I'm recirculating that 2009 GOP memo here. Take inspiration from it.
February 2, 2025 at 5:33 PM
When I was a Hill staffer in 2009, a Dem trifecta was trying to pass universal healthcare. In response, Senate GOP released a memo detailing all of the tactics they in the minority could use to delay the effort as much as possible. I'm recirculating that 2009 GOP memo here. Take inspiration from it.