Reposted by shmalex
Feeling like this today…
January 20, 2025 at 3:16 AM
Feeling like this today…
when she ignores you </3
(she just didn't hear me)
(she just didn't hear me)
December 3, 2024 at 3:49 AM
when she ignores you </3
(she just didn't hear me)
(she just didn't hear me)
pov: your parents abandoned you for thanksgiving😍
November 28, 2024 at 11:38 PM
pov: your parents abandoned you for thanksgiving😍
Reposted by shmalex
Reposted by shmalex
when i worked at circle k we had to lock up the beers at night because they came to life once
November 26, 2024 at 2:45 AM
when i worked at circle k we had to lock up the beers at night because they came to life once
Reposted by shmalex
When your relatives start arguing at Thanksgiving, calmly grab your favorite serving bowl of food like you're going to the kitchen to refill it, and just don't come back. Quietly escape with your favorite food.
This has been survival tips with Jen.
This has been survival tips with Jen.
November 26, 2024 at 6:00 PM
When your relatives start arguing at Thanksgiving, calmly grab your favorite serving bowl of food like you're going to the kitchen to refill it, and just don't come back. Quietly escape with your favorite food.
This has been survival tips with Jen.
This has been survival tips with Jen.
the place my wife works at needs to UNHAND HER IMMEDIATELY. thank you.
November 27, 2024 at 6:26 AM
the place my wife works at needs to UNHAND HER IMMEDIATELY. thank you.
Reposted by shmalex
Me: I cleared the table for dessert.
Her: Why did you leave these cranberries out?
Me: DON’T TOUCH THEM!!!
Her: What…Why???
Me: You have to let them linger.
Her: Why did you leave these cranberries out?
Me: DON’T TOUCH THEM!!!
Her: What…Why???
Me: You have to let them linger.
November 27, 2024 at 12:46 AM
Me: I cleared the table for dessert.
Her: Why did you leave these cranberries out?
Me: DON’T TOUCH THEM!!!
Her: What…Why???
Me: You have to let them linger.
Her: Why did you leave these cranberries out?
Me: DON’T TOUCH THEM!!!
Her: What…Why???
Me: You have to let them linger.
i miss my wife! she's at work rn :(
November 27, 2024 at 6:18 AM
i miss my wife! she's at work rn :(
it's cold as shit today
November 26, 2024 at 6:15 PM
it's cold as shit today
Reposted by shmalex
Make art that you think is fuckin sick as hell. Make the shit you never thought you could that you always wanted to see. Beat your insecurity to death and fight to become your own favorite artist.
November 26, 2024 at 5:18 AM
Make art that you think is fuckin sick as hell. Make the shit you never thought you could that you always wanted to see. Beat your insecurity to death and fight to become your own favorite artist.
please order pizza, it's so dead in here💔
November 25, 2024 at 11:29 PM
please order pizza, it's so dead in here💔
Reposted by shmalex
mr beast should be hunted for sport live on peacock plus
November 25, 2024 at 12:54 AM
mr beast should be hunted for sport live on peacock plus
Reposted by shmalex
OHMYGOD I've just realised!!!
S.onic
O.hmygod so fast
N.o way Robotnik!
I. Love Playing Sonic games
C.haos Emeralds yes please
S.onic
O.hmygod so fast
N.o way Robotnik!
I. Love Playing Sonic games
C.haos Emeralds yes please
November 25, 2024 at 1:23 PM
OHMYGOD I've just realised!!!
S.onic
O.hmygod so fast
N.o way Robotnik!
I. Love Playing Sonic games
C.haos Emeralds yes please
S.onic
O.hmygod so fast
N.o way Robotnik!
I. Love Playing Sonic games
C.haos Emeralds yes please
Reposted by shmalex
telling my wife to like and subscribe after sex
November 25, 2024 at 12:42 AM
telling my wife to like and subscribe after sex
Reposted by shmalex
Gonna write a Christmas song about holiday cheer and global warming called “Mosquitoes in December”.
November 24, 2024 at 4:17 PM
Gonna write a Christmas song about holiday cheer and global warming called “Mosquitoes in December”.
i hung out with my wife and a friend AND got a luck voltia figurine. W day
November 25, 2024 at 6:28 AM
i hung out with my wife and a friend AND got a luck voltia figurine. W day
Reposted by shmalex
November 6th, 2024
November 24, 2024 at 2:20 AM
November 6th, 2024
why there so many ppl at my work😭😭
November 24, 2024 at 11:40 PM
why there so many ppl at my work😭😭
Reposted by shmalex
Was talking to some dude and he said that he heard a song that made him think of me. Naturally, I asked him to share with me. That MF sent Copacabana by Barry Manilow and I really hope the aliens take me at this point
November 23, 2024 at 8:18 PM
Was talking to some dude and he said that he heard a song that made him think of me. Naturally, I asked him to share with me. That MF sent Copacabana by Barry Manilow and I really hope the aliens take me at this point
Reposted by shmalex
Working on a sequel to the purge where murder is illegal 365 days a year
November 23, 2024 at 9:21 PM
Working on a sequel to the purge where murder is illegal 365 days a year
when you offend her so hard she deletes her first post😭😭😭
November 24, 2024 at 7:15 AM
when you offend her so hard she deletes her first post😭😭😭
when she won't make her first bluesky post about you💔💔💔
November 24, 2024 at 7:03 AM
when she won't make her first bluesky post about you💔💔💔