Jess
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pronetohyperbole.bsky.social
Jess
@pronetohyperbole.bsky.social
She/her | Powered by caffeine and spite
Reposted by Jess
B.C. emergency management:
• Access between Lower Mainland and Interior closed
• Nooksack River topped its banks around 2pm, water going across border to Sumas prairie
• Rainfall in Fraser Valley now easing up
• Nooksack flows expected to peak ~10pm, hold til 4-6am, then decline
December 11, 2025 at 5:04 AM
Reposted by Jess
9:20 pm update. Major highways between Lower Mainland and Interior closed due to flooding, falling rock/debris, high avalanche hazards.

“Very important” to avoid unnecessary travel in Fraser Valley to clear roads for evacs

www.drivebc.ca/advisories/f...
December 11, 2025 at 5:39 AM
Reposted by Jess
because Jurassic Park is trans rep
December 9, 2025 at 4:05 AM
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Up the Whitecaps?

UP THE F*^%ING WHITECAPS! #VWFC
December 6, 2025 at 6:29 PM
Reposted by Jess
A singer-songwriter friend would like people to know that while boycotting Spotify is great, it was also 16% of their income that is now cratering. So if you're cancelling Spotify, please pair that with buying music, merch, or live tickets directly from your favorite artists
December 4, 2025 at 4:55 PM
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Get! Off! Substack! I won't read your links! If they're on substack!
May 28, 2025 at 4:15 PM
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one of the coolest things about ChatGPT is how you can actually just never use it. you can fill your whole entire life with simply not once using it. it's incredible.
November 25, 2025 at 4:15 PM
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#VWFC WIN AND ADVANCE TO THE CONFERENCE FINAL!!

Truly an all time MLS game, and it ends with the biggest playoff win of the Vancouver Whitecaps MLS era. What an unhinged start, middle and ending
November 23, 2025 at 5:41 AM
HOLY SHIT
November 23, 2025 at 5:39 AM
NINE minutes of stoppage time?!? I'm going to vomit. #VWFC
November 23, 2025 at 4:33 AM
HELL YEAH #GOLDENEYES WIN!
November 22, 2025 at 5:58 AM
Reposted by Jess
I should add that if you'd like to channel your disgust with Alberta's anti-trans government into a front-line charity doing lifesaving work for trans folks in Alberta, click below and throw some money at Skipping Stone www.skippingstone.ca/donate
Donate — Skipping Stone
With your support, Skipping Stone leads the way in providing affirming care to trans and gender diverse youth, adults, and families.
www.skippingstone.ca
November 19, 2025 at 3:19 AM
Reposted by Jess
This anti-trans law is opposed by:
- the Canadian Medical Association
- Alberta teachers
- Civil rights groups
- the Canadian legal system
- roughly half of the polling public in Alberta

It is supported by:
- Danielle Smith
- the "Danielle Smith can do what she wants" loophole
November 18, 2025 at 11:28 PM
Second Christmas hat done, and a sleepy Magpie. Pattern is pine forest hat by EVVASH
November 16, 2025 at 8:00 PM
Really glad a different project turned into an absolute shit show this afternoon, I definitely want to deal with a grumpy boss when I have urgent things we need to get through in the next hour so I can have an actual Friday night with friends
November 15, 2025 at 12:10 AM
Used my day off to make two jars of tomato sauce, 9 cups of vegetable broth, and an ungodly amount of chopped, sliced and diced onions. The onions aren’t actually finished, but I’m making dad do the rest because it suuuuucks
November 11, 2025 at 9:55 PM
My onions mostly didn’t cure properly so I have to chop them up and freeze them, but it’s still a pretty good haul.
November 11, 2025 at 7:09 PM
Reposted by Jess
every generation loves Rumours. it’s fucking Rumours
November 9, 2025 at 2:55 AM
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A 34-year-old as a politician: My god he's like a baby. It's like they just elected an infant to be their mayor.

A 34-year-old as an athlete: You have to admire the bravery of him attempting that dunk, knowing full well the grim reaper is right behind him.
November 5, 2025 at 5:45 AM
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I have decided: I don't need to know that the shipping label was created. Keep me in the dark on that. Come back to me when something real is happening
November 4, 2025 at 5:54 PM
For someone that complains constantly about how other coordinators don’t plan anything out ahead of time, my boss sure does love blowing up all the planning I actually do
November 4, 2025 at 8:04 PM
I’m working on the second Christmas hat, and I’ve decided that I truly hate knitting 4-5 inches of 1k2p rib. It looks good in the end, BUT AT WHAT COST
November 3, 2025 at 12:59 AM
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We truly live in the worst timeline. Lol.
November 2, 2025 at 4:19 AM
Fuck.
November 2, 2025 at 4:18 AM
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Rooting not just for a Game 7 of the World Series, but another 18 inning game that goes so long on Saturday night that the clocks fall back at 2am before it’s ended and everyone gets tremendously confused about what time it is.
October 30, 2025 at 4:27 AM