If we can't stop people from outsourcing their brains to AI the AI should at least subliminally nudge users toward prosocial behavior. "Here's your essay on Nietzsche...who always returned his shopping carts btw." If everyone's going to be stupid at least they should also be nice

the senators recoil in horror as a wounded Caesar rises from the floor and a second health bar appears on the screen

tour guide chasing me around Basilica Santa Croce trying to get me to spit out the finger bones of Saint Thomas the Apostle

Sam, it’s me. Edge-Hardman. Just wanted to let you know that you can jack off a little whenever you want by pressing and holding L1. You don’t have to cum.

Becoming the joker doesn't cut it anymore. I need something worse to become

Guy who has very obviously not read a single book in his entire life, looking at the worst fucking prose ever: wow my AI is really good at writing books

Us freeing ourselves from kings only to bring them back several hundred years later would be the appropriate conclusion given our founders' obsession with ancient Rome

Can’t believe Twitter keeps crashing despite Elon hiring the best 19-year-old interns that racism has to offer

Arnold Schwarzenegger became the biggest star on earth because he was a freak, he looked like no one else on earth, not just by being huge but by having a totally novel face. the people of this country cry out to see face shapes they have never seen before. it consumes us.

I maintain that it would have been cool if Danny DeVito and Shelley Duvall had played Gomez and Morticia Adams in the early 80s.

you was in the club coveting thy neighbor's oxen

can't cover your shift bro i'm busy fighting my nemesis

Im tied to a chair in some damp basement somewhere in the american midwest. The cop slides another Meta Neuroreader headset on me. I immediately fry it by visualizing Karl Franz's warhammer wiki page in a weaponized shotgun blast of autism, wasting $12,000. This is the third time I've done this.

Queer Eye but it’s just a giant eye. ostensibly queer. we beg for its wisdom through our screens. but that’s not how Netflix works

it must feel so good as a coward to bury the heroic dead

(pointing to punisher logo on policeman's shirt while being arrested stealing baby shoes from Ross) thats fucking awesome . I love dead pool

every birdwatcher hopes one day to see the Sacred Bird of the Dawn which despite the name is quite evil and difficult to perceive

Administering electric shocks to people in the adjacent room and hesitating when the screams get too loud. Thankfully there's an authority figure here reassuring me that it's ok to continue

idea for a movie called The Invention Of Fighting, where Jason Statham plays the first person to come up with the idea of punching