Stone Cold Swerve Autism
@swervestray.bsky.social
Pinned
I may not agree with what you say, but I will gladly die so that I don't have to keep listening to it.
Philosophy is like drugs in that if you do it, pretty soon you'll be saying things that make you sound crazy.
December 24, 2025 at 4:53 PM
Philosophy is like drugs in that if you do it, pretty soon you'll be saying things that make you sound crazy.
Some people fistbump like their fist is giving yours a kiss. Not me. I'm playing bloody knuckles every time. I'm a macho man. Everyone likes me.
December 21, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Some people fistbump like their fist is giving yours a kiss. Not me. I'm playing bloody knuckles every time. I'm a macho man. Everyone likes me.
I want to return to the warmth of the dream!
December 18, 2025 at 9:55 PM
I want to return to the warmth of the dream!
I used to think I could be one of the Talented Posters, like I was the little mermaid, dreaming of legs
December 12, 2025 at 3:49 AM
I used to think I could be one of the Talented Posters, like I was the little mermaid, dreaming of legs
My 9yo told me about his feelings! I was so excited, I could not stay chill about it. So he rubbed his butt into my face. Day in the life
December 12, 2025 at 3:31 AM
My 9yo told me about his feelings! I was so excited, I could not stay chill about it. So he rubbed his butt into my face. Day in the life
I didn't even know there was a new Final Fantasy Tactics game! I have to start saving my nickels!
December 12, 2025 at 3:28 AM
I didn't even know there was a new Final Fantasy Tactics game! I have to start saving my nickels!
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
Not wild about being beheaded in the town square. But love to see the startled birds fly from their perches as the sword sings, as if to symbolize my immortal essence flying toward da Heavenz
September 7, 2024 at 12:05 AM
Not wild about being beheaded in the town square. But love to see the startled birds fly from their perches as the sword sings, as if to symbolize my immortal essence flying toward da Heavenz
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
Ignore the man by the entrance claiming to have “the map the zoo doesn’t want you to see.” And please, please do not take his map.
December 3, 2025 at 5:06 PM
Ignore the man by the entrance claiming to have “the map the zoo doesn’t want you to see.” And please, please do not take his map.
For this post, I wanted to avoid going meta, but--ope, too late!
December 4, 2025 at 10:50 PM
For this post, I wanted to avoid going meta, but--ope, too late!
I used to think conservatives were dumb for listening to Rush Limbaugh, but then I reflected that I get most of my opinions from a purple hippopotamus online.
December 1, 2025 at 3:16 AM
I used to think conservatives were dumb for listening to Rush Limbaugh, but then I reflected that I get most of my opinions from a purple hippopotamus online.
My son, meme genius, has announced that you can deflect a rickroll by doing the dance.
a man is singing into a microphone in front of a window
ALT: a man is singing into a microphone in front of a window
media.tenor.com
November 27, 2025 at 5:39 PM
My son, meme genius, has announced that you can deflect a rickroll by doing the dance.
I just learned that three of the biggest risk factors for cancer are age, sex, and race, and now I'm really worried because I have all three of those things!
November 26, 2025 at 5:02 PM
I just learned that three of the biggest risk factors for cancer are age, sex, and race, and now I'm really worried because I have all three of those things!
@lanyardigan.bsky.social you always do the best retweets
November 26, 2025 at 4:53 PM
@lanyardigan.bsky.social you always do the best retweets
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
No one at the rap battle will wait for me to type my prompts
November 25, 2025 at 12:24 PM
No one at the rap battle will wait for me to type my prompts
There are no laws of nature. There's just nature doing what it likes, and nature is extremely autistic.
November 26, 2025 at 4:35 PM
There are no laws of nature. There's just nature doing what it likes, and nature is extremely autistic.
I have nothing to say, but I demand that you pay attention to me.
November 24, 2025 at 4:25 AM
I have nothing to say, but I demand that you pay attention to me.
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
My friend just fuckin showed up with a corncob pipe & that’s when it hit me that we are all in our 40s which means we get one new accessory slot
November 23, 2025 at 9:11 PM
My friend just fuckin showed up with a corncob pipe & that’s when it hit me that we are all in our 40s which means we get one new accessory slot
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
The ideal usecase for these chatbots is that you ask them a question, get an answer that allow you to do the thing you were doing outside the bot, and then do not interact with it again until several hours later
The technical term for this is "abysmal engagement rates"
The technical term for this is "abysmal engagement rates"
The company essentially turned a dial that made ChatGPT more appealing and made people use it more, but sent some of them into delusional spirals.
OpenAI has since made the chatbot safer, but that comes with a tradeoff: less usage.
OpenAI has since made the chatbot safer, but that comes with a tradeoff: less usage.
November 23, 2025 at 11:07 PM
The ideal usecase for these chatbots is that you ask them a question, get an answer that allow you to do the thing you were doing outside the bot, and then do not interact with it again until several hours later
The technical term for this is "abysmal engagement rates"
The technical term for this is "abysmal engagement rates"
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
(government minister reading a report on the thousandth clinical drug trial of a pill that eliminates poverty, with a 100% success rate, that generates 10 times the value it costs to produce & makes government ministers public heroes) I don't understand, so the poor are made to suffer how, exactly?
There has literally never been a universal basic income trial program that didn't deliver real and measurable results above and beyond any other form of social welfare, and every time another concludes with the same findings the powers that be go "interesting! Anyway," and pretend it wouldn't work.
November 22, 2025 at 9:39 AM
(government minister reading a report on the thousandth clinical drug trial of a pill that eliminates poverty, with a 100% success rate, that generates 10 times the value it costs to produce & makes government ministers public heroes) I don't understand, so the poor are made to suffer how, exactly?
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
Serial burnout
November 23, 2025 at 1:08 AM
Serial burnout
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
Prediction: They Might Be Giants will release their chillest song ever, but they'll have like, a shrieking soprano bassoon wail across the bridge.
November 5, 2025 at 5:18 PM
Prediction: They Might Be Giants will release their chillest song ever, but they'll have like, a shrieking soprano bassoon wail across the bridge.
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
ANUBIS: (presses button with paw) [guilty]
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good
November 2, 2025 at 12:23 PM
ANUBIS: (presses button with paw) [guilty]
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good
Reposted by Stone Cold Swerve Autism
thought this hammer was going to pay for itself but so far nothing in my home is a geode
July 23, 2025 at 3:08 AM
thought this hammer was going to pay for itself but so far nothing in my home is a geode