Lightnews — Scholar-powered news

Reposted by Ali

Jane @localnotail.bsky.social · 8h

"The letter sorting machine in the old post office, which appears in Going Postal , where Johnson designed a circle whose pi is exactly 3. To do this, he had to bend reality, and the result was a sorting machine that sorts letters that haven't been written yet. Or never will be. Or could be written"

Works by Bergholt Stuttley Johnson
The gardens of the Patrician Palace in Ankh-Morpork. These include a maze so small that you get lost trying to find it; a chiming sundial that exploded; a mosaic that committed suicide; a trout pond that's an impressive 150 meters long and a disconcerting 2.5cm wide;
a hoho; a beehive so large that it serves as a landing point for mindless albatrosses; and cast-iron garden furniture that's melted in the sun 13 times.
The monuments of Ankh-Morpork, so small they're kept in a box. These include the Colossus of Morpork and a triumphal arch for the Battle of Crumbhorn.
A fountain that had to be hastily shut down shortly after it was put into operation because it hurled its fountain figure 300 meters into the air.
A spice rack for the mad Lord Schnappüber, as an artfully crafted pepper and salt shaker set, in which four families now live in the pepper shaker and the salt shaker serves as the city's wheat storage facility.
An improved manicure tool that is now used as a potato peeler in the kitchen of the Unseen University.
The famous mechanical coffee spoon, which supposedly stirs the coffee in the cup so quickly that the cup lifts off the saucer and hits the ceiling.
The collapsed tower of Quirm, deliberately built with quicksand.
The Hanging Gardens of Ankh.
The Exploding Pagoda.
The Villa of Quirm, with the nonexistent view.
The Experience Sickle, a residential complex that defies the laws of geometry.
The large organ in Bleibtdemschlossfern in Überwald, which can play unusual sound effects such as thunder, howling wolves, screaming young women, and creaking floorboards, and is powered by the water power of an underground river.
The organ in the Ankh-Morpork Opera House, mentioned in Masquerade .
The organ in the Unseen University in Ankh-Morpork. The instrument, curiously enough, has a direct connection to the Archchancellor's bathroom, which he also built.

2 7

Reposted by Ali

Micah @rincewind.run · 9h

lowkey I would like a supplementary appendix to one of the Discworld books that is just Bloody Stupid Johnson's inventions and a list of related incidents

12 7 190

Reposted by Ali

Micah @rincewind.run · 10h

Discworld QOTD, from Hogfather

The late (or at least severely delayed) Bergholt Stuttley Johnson was generally recognized as the worst inventor in the world, yet in a very specialized sense. Merely bad inventors made things that failed to operate. He wasn’t among these small fry. Any fool could make something that did absolutely nothing when you pressed the button. He scorned such fumble-fingered amateurs. Everything he built worked. It just didn’t do what it said on the box. If you wanted a small ground-to-air missile, you asked Johnson to design an ornamental fountain.

11 78 460

Reposted by Ali

Micah @rincewind.run · 1d

by the end of the series Rincewind has not only lapped the field in "times nearly killed" but also broken the scoreboard, despite his fervent desire to spend the rest of eternity bored with nothing but a potato for company

8 4 180

Reposted by Ali

Micah @rincewind.run · 1d

Discworld QOTD, from The Light Fantastic

"‘You run away a lot,’ said one of the voices. ‘That is good. You are a survivor.’

‘Survivor? I’ve nearly been killed dozens of times!’

‘Exactly.’"

Micah @rincewind.run · 2d

Discworld QOTD, from Small Gods

That's why it's always worth having a few philosophers around the place. One minute it's all is truth beauty and is beauty truth, and does a falling tree in the forest make a sound if there's no one there to hear it, and then just when you think they're going to start dribbling one of 'em says, incidentally, putting a thirty-foot parabolic reflector on a high place to shoot the rays of the sun at an enemy's ships would be a very interesting demonstration of optical principles.

5 63 450

Reposted by Ali

Maia @maiainmi.bsky.social · 2d

And it's always wise to give them a safe, quiet, comfortable place to work, preferably one they can't escape from.*

* Leonard of Quirm could probably escape from his workshop with barely a second's thought, but he's too happy with the situation to worry about it.

3 1 21

Reposted by Ali

The Urban Dragon @urbandragons.com · 2d

Later refine into Leonard of Quirm’s shock that any of his designs could be used destructively since that would be unthinkable to do

1 4

Reposted by Ali

Micah @rincewind.run · 2d

that's the thing about terrible engines of death and destruction

they are always so neat from a physics perspective, and open to creative optimization

6 5 180

Reposted by Ali

Micah @rincewind.run · 2d

Discworld QOTD, from Small Gods

4 110 650

Reposted by Ali

Mattslew Batberg-Mothfit (any/all) @mbrobergmoffitt.bsky.social · 6h

Explain to me why “conversion therapy” is banned in 28 countries and ABA is not, when they have the same creator (O. Ivar Lovaas) and utilize similar if not identical principles, techniques, and goals (forced assimilation).

Mattslew Batberg-Mothfit (any/all) @mbrobergmoffitt.bsky.social · 7h

Autism $peaks is the largest and most popular Autism organization (among allistics), who continues to be 100% in support of ABA. They have lobbyists who push ABA as the “gold standard Autism treatment.” It utilizes same practices as “conversion therapy,” which is currently banned in 28 countries.

Mattslew Batberg-Mothfit (any/all) @mbrobergmoffitt.bsky.social · 7h

ABA (Applied Behavioral Analysis) is the “gold standard” of “treatment” for Autism, and was created by the person as “Conversion therapy” (see Lovaas) with similar techniques and goals. It’s torture that continues to have widespread support and acceptance.

8 120 310

Ali @littlemissteach.bsky.social · 2h

Hope you had a relaxing time. Love this song ❤️

1 2

Reposted by Ali

steveprince2472.bsky.social @steveprince2472.bsky.social · 2h

Morning all. A day of sorting out here, shopping and generally getting myself in order. Going with this today. Heard it in the car on the way home from the airport yesterday. youtu.be/kryV3E4QKGk?...

Semisonic - Secret Smile

YouTube video by SemisonicVEVO

youtu.be

2 1 7

Reposted by Ali

Rachel Jenkins @rachelj47127149.bsky.social · 2h

@steveprince2472.bsky.social @stephathers.bsky.social @therese88.bsky.social @kerryc98.bsky.social @sheilattuned.bsky.social @caroline68.bsky.social @oliverslt.bsky.social @lindsaykittens.bsky.social @gwhitebread.bsky.social @sidneypaget.bsky.social @frenchie70.bsky.social

5 2 6

Reposted by Ali

Rachel Jenkins @rachelj47127149.bsky.social · 2h

#TOTD
@theknittinggrandma.bsky.social @glenavon-girl.bsky.social (if you'd like to be tagged too)

1 3

Reposted by Ali

Rachel Jenkins @rachelj47127149.bsky.social · 2h

#TrackOfTheDay Have a great start to the week 🤞🧡🎶
@mrsveritea.bsky.social @kcauchi.bsky.social @amandarussell35.bsky.social @compscitsui.bsky.social @sneekylinux.bsky.social @nickidigest.bsky.social @gaiinz.bsky.social @littlemissteach.bsky.social @mindbodysoulnrg.bsky.social @ka81.bsky.social

8 1 5

Reposted by Ali

MrsVeriTea @mrsveritea.bsky.social · 9h

Back from a weekend in #TheMotherland & it’s been busy, but made it back 🏠 in time for the pub quiz, & now, still adrenaline-pumped from it all, am sharing this with you.
Remember - you ARE amazing!

m.youtube.com/watch?v=U9G-...

Teddy Swims - Amazing (Live From RAK Studios in London)

YouTube video by Teddy Swims

m.youtube.com

1 3

Reposted by Ali

Brian Groom @groomb.bsky.social · 1d

Robert Stephenson, one of the greatest engineers and a designer of locomotives, died on this day 1859. Son of George Stephenson, the 'father of railways'. Designed the Rocket and lots of bridges.

2 13 85

Reposted by Ali

Teaching with my eyes shut @eyesshutteacher.bsky.social · 13h

Exactly this.

Louise Ting @neuro-observant.bsky.social · 16h

Every time someone talks about “curing” autism, what they’re really saying is:

That autism is a disease
That we are broken
That we shouldn’t exist

It’s not just wrong - it’s dehumanising

We’re not a problem to be solved.
We’re real, valid humans

Why is that so hard to see?

#AutismAdvocacy

1 7

Reposted by Ali

Jay Hulme @jayhulmepoet.bsky.social · 11h

Did some colouring in and could only find the Sharpies I'd bought for a workshop I'd run a few weeks ago, and... I've never coloured in with a pen that doesn't go all weird and Streaky? What is this? Uniform? Colour? Is it? Magic?

A coloured in floral pattern. The colours are uniform and not streaky

2 3 100

Reposted by Ali

Rachel Jenkins @rachelj47127149.bsky.social · 11h

Evening Ali! Running late posting, which is probably good or you'd have had a grumpy song, rather than this one! 😂

youtu.be/LzMBQmvMUW8?...

"Goodnight Ladies" - Lou Reed (Music Video)

YouTube video by Marguerita Passion

youtu.be

1 5

Reposted by Ali

Teaching with my eyes shut @eyesshutteacher.bsky.social · 11h

Setting boundaries is saying enough is enough and standing up for yourself. 😊

Pantrywoman @pantrywoman.bsky.social · 19h

3 9

Reposted by Ali

Jay Hulme @jayhulmepoet.bsky.social · 11h

I keep getting adverts for a Kendal Mint Cake Advent Calendar, and as someone who has choked down vast quantities of Kendal Mint Cake while dangerously close to hypothermia, on an exposed cliff in a storm, desperately inching towards a safe place to stop and camp... I cannot think of anything worse.

4 2 130

Reposted by Ali

Teaching with my eyes shut @eyesshutteacher.bsky.social · 14h

In honour of spooky month, share a 4 word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand

“Windy and full moon”

Sue Cowley @suecowley.bsky.social · 18h

In honour of spooky month, share a 4 word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand

'We've had the call.'

🏰meg⚔️ @Birthright Audiobook! @impavid.us · 3d

In honor of spooky month, share a 4 word horror story that only someone in your profession would understand

I'll go first: Six page commercial lease.

3 3 10

Reposted by Ali

RevDaniel 🇨🇦 @revdaniel.bsky.social · 12h

Friend’s wedding today - and I don’t have to officiate just be a guest! Decided to accessorize with yellow - not a colour I usually wear. If it’s too pale it washes me out; if there’s too much of it, I look jaundiced. But I think the tie is working

Close up of tie and shirt showing colours and patterns

13 2 150

Ali @littlemissteach.bsky.social · 12h

Aldi special! 😂

2