Apple Bottom Jings
@afraidofwasps.bsky.social
driving behind you really close with my brights on and i'm screaming
Pinned
(DMing girl) Life is so randommm it's like.. Whyyyyyy Lol. (logging into Albert Einstein role playing account) (DMing same girl) Life makes perfect since
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call me a circular cardboard slip placed under drinks the way I've been coasting
October 19, 2025 at 1:36 AM
call me a circular cardboard slip placed under drinks the way I've been coasting
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Call me spoon the way I’m makeing a stir
October 14, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Call me spoon the way I’m makeing a stir
Rick and Morty. Guards posted on the edge of darkness, one on each end of the brief flash of light we call our existence. Morty - from the french word Mort, meaning death. And Rick, of course, derived from the ancient japanese concept of 生きる、which means "To Live"
November 19, 2025 at 7:49 PM
Rick and Morty. Guards posted on the edge of darkness, one on each end of the brief flash of light we call our existence. Morty - from the french word Mort, meaning death. And Rick, of course, derived from the ancient japanese concept of 生きる、which means "To Live"
We have food at home 😂
Food at home: Ramen that I cummed in
Food at home: Ramen that I cummed in
November 16, 2025 at 3:51 AM
We have food at home 😂
Food at home: Ramen that I cummed in
Food at home: Ramen that I cummed in
Say what you want about Fat Bastard, the stereotypes he's riffing on, the sharpness of the writing, etc. But having him like to eat babies was a stroke of pure inspiration
November 14, 2025 at 4:48 AM
Say what you want about Fat Bastard, the stereotypes he's riffing on, the sharpness of the writing, etc. But having him like to eat babies was a stroke of pure inspiration
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jd vance post: erm mom can you pick me up? liberals are trusting the word of *checks notes* jeffrey epstein??
trump post: "THE CORRECT TERM FOR THE PRESIDENT IS EPHEBOPHILE NOT PEDOPHILE" - THE GREAT MARK LEVIN ON FOX NEWS
trump post: "THE CORRECT TERM FOR THE PRESIDENT IS EPHEBOPHILE NOT PEDOPHILE" - THE GREAT MARK LEVIN ON FOX NEWS
November 12, 2025 at 10:58 PM
jd vance post: erm mom can you pick me up? liberals are trusting the word of *checks notes* jeffrey epstein??
trump post: "THE CORRECT TERM FOR THE PRESIDENT IS EPHEBOPHILE NOT PEDOPHILE" - THE GREAT MARK LEVIN ON FOX NEWS
trump post: "THE CORRECT TERM FOR THE PRESIDENT IS EPHEBOPHILE NOT PEDOPHILE" - THE GREAT MARK LEVIN ON FOX NEWS
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jd vance 2015: has anyone seen #Archer? #ThatsHowYouGetAnts lol!
jd vance 2025: I'm not saying it's necessarily good to be molested - no one is saying that - but if you are going to be molested, obviously you'd want the President of the United States to do it. Why do we pretend otherwise?
jd vance 2025: I'm not saying it's necessarily good to be molested - no one is saying that - but if you are going to be molested, obviously you'd want the President of the United States to do it. Why do we pretend otherwise?
November 13, 2025 at 5:09 PM
jd vance 2015: has anyone seen #Archer? #ThatsHowYouGetAnts lol!
jd vance 2025: I'm not saying it's necessarily good to be molested - no one is saying that - but if you are going to be molested, obviously you'd want the President of the United States to do it. Why do we pretend otherwise?
jd vance 2025: I'm not saying it's necessarily good to be molested - no one is saying that - but if you are going to be molested, obviously you'd want the President of the United States to do it. Why do we pretend otherwise?
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Pizzagate: If you replace the word “hot dog” with “little boy” and “pizza party” with “child sex orgy,” you will see the lengths these elites go to cover up their crimes.
Real elite emails: Send me nude pictures of those 8th graders we abused last weekend post-haste! I am the Ambassador to Turkey.
Real elite emails: Send me nude pictures of those 8th graders we abused last weekend post-haste! I am the Ambassador to Turkey.
November 12, 2025 at 11:10 PM
Pizzagate: If you replace the word “hot dog” with “little boy” and “pizza party” with “child sex orgy,” you will see the lengths these elites go to cover up their crimes.
Real elite emails: Send me nude pictures of those 8th graders we abused last weekend post-haste! I am the Ambassador to Turkey.
Real elite emails: Send me nude pictures of those 8th graders we abused last weekend post-haste! I am the Ambassador to Turkey.
body slamming a cat and a hairball comes out at four thousand miles and hour and breaks a priceless vase
November 12, 2025 at 7:33 PM
body slamming a cat and a hairball comes out at four thousand miles and hour and breaks a priceless vase
i love tech discourse...
November 12, 2025 at 5:03 PM
i love tech discourse...
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second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard
November 9, 2025 at 3:10 PM
second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard
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learning a lot about relationships on tiktok
November 11, 2025 at 6:10 PM
learning a lot about relationships on tiktok
Cheerios Oat Crunch box: Start your day SO satisfied - Fill up with BIG FLAVOR
Me pouring myself a bowl: I just fuckin might...
Me pouring myself a bowl: I just fuckin might...
November 11, 2025 at 3:46 PM
Cheerios Oat Crunch box: Start your day SO satisfied - Fill up with BIG FLAVOR
Me pouring myself a bowl: I just fuckin might...
Me pouring myself a bowl: I just fuckin might...
Lowkey this looks difficult
New uncanny valley unlocked: inflatable corn maze for urban fall fests.
November 9, 2025 at 6:59 AM
Lowkey this looks difficult
you guys aren't gonna believe how hard i just bit the inside of my lip
November 8, 2025 at 8:15 PM
you guys aren't gonna believe how hard i just bit the inside of my lip
Login form: Password, cannot be blank.
Me; Fuck you.... Fuck your family.......
Me; Fuck you.... Fuck your family.......
November 5, 2025 at 3:03 PM
Login form: Password, cannot be blank.
Me; Fuck you.... Fuck your family.......
Me; Fuck you.... Fuck your family.......
stepping on a skateboard by accident and going on the ride of my life
November 4, 2025 at 8:48 PM
stepping on a skateboard by accident and going on the ride of my life
nice buccal fat bro it would be a shame if i removed it surgically
November 4, 2025 at 6:20 PM
nice buccal fat bro it would be a shame if i removed it surgically
Shut the fuck up babe, i'm reading Stoner by John Williams. Babe, i'm sorry I said that to you. It's just that I was reading Stoner
November 3, 2025 at 5:40 PM
Shut the fuck up babe, i'm reading Stoner by John Williams. Babe, i'm sorry I said that to you. It's just that I was reading Stoner
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Abduction of Proserpina, by Giambologna, 1579 (from the @NortonSimon Museum in Pasadena), 📸 by @nturchiarophoto
November 2, 2025 at 3:13 PM
Abduction of Proserpina, by Giambologna, 1579 (from the @NortonSimon Museum in Pasadena), 📸 by @nturchiarophoto
(officiating wedding) Do you? Do you? (entering crowd work mode) (pointing at guy in front row) I know this motherfucker Do
October 31, 2025 at 7:05 PM
(officiating wedding) Do you? Do you? (entering crowd work mode) (pointing at guy in front row) I know this motherfucker Do
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Nice reply "owning" me, unfortunately you parsed 2 levels of irony but missed completely the third, wherein it's clear I'm making fun of the persona your reply intended to critique. That being said I'm still hurt to an almost unimaginable degree
November 30, 2024 at 9:58 PM
Nice reply "owning" me, unfortunately you parsed 2 levels of irony but missed completely the third, wherein it's clear I'm making fun of the persona your reply intended to critique. That being said I'm still hurt to an almost unimaginable degree
Might become one of those guys with a stick up his ass. Seems like it would feel awesome
October 28, 2025 at 9:08 PM
Might become one of those guys with a stick up his ass. Seems like it would feel awesome
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it would be awesome to live in the pigs world
From: Fair, then Partly Piggy (1988), dir. Toshio Hirata, Oh! Production
October 12, 2025 at 12:46 AM
it would be awesome to live in the pigs world
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SOMEONE IN THE DODGER DUGOUT: you know you have Sasaki, right
DAVE ROBERTS: oh, RIGHT.
DAVE ROBERTS: oh, RIGHT.
oh now Roki Sasaki is available and warming
October 7, 2025 at 1:11 AM
SOMEONE IN THE DODGER DUGOUT: you know you have Sasaki, right
DAVE ROBERTS: oh, RIGHT.
DAVE ROBERTS: oh, RIGHT.