Dr. JMac
@drjmac.bsky.social
The internet’s most beloved shrink
Pinned
Dr. JMac
@drjmac.bsky.social
· Dec 30
Ice cream flavors I have made since buying myself an ice cream machine, a thread:
This is the ideal gay couple
December 21, 2025 at 12:58 AM
This is the ideal gay couple
Prepping a catapult to launch Bill Clinton into the sea. There’s room enough for two in the spoon, we can easily fit another President in there
December 20, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Prepping a catapult to launch Bill Clinton into the sea. There’s room enough for two in the spoon, we can easily fit another President in there
When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
“I know what would fix this:
A new guitar”
Mother Mary comes to me
“I know what would fix this:
A new guitar”
December 20, 2025 at 7:03 PM
When I find myself in times of trouble
Mother Mary comes to me
“I know what would fix this:
A new guitar”
Mother Mary comes to me
“I know what would fix this:
A new guitar”
Conservatives don’t say anything positive about literal Hitler challenge 2026. Y’all didn’t make it this year, so let’s try to better next year.
December 19, 2025 at 6:47 PM
Conservatives don’t say anything positive about literal Hitler challenge 2026. Y’all didn’t make it this year, so let’s try to better next year.
This man *looks* like he’s seen every execution for the last 36 years
John Koch, a 76-year-old radio reporter in North Florida, has witnessed every state execution since the serial killer Ted Bundy’s in 1989. This year, the state has had a record number of 19 executions. “It gets hard,” he told us. nyti.ms/4aZ9gzv
December 19, 2025 at 6:02 PM
This man *looks* like he’s seen every execution for the last 36 years
It should be illegal for British people to wear cowboy hats
Accused rapist Russell Brand opens his AmFest 2025 speech with a prayer asking God to return, among other things...
December 19, 2025 at 2:37 PM
It should be illegal for British people to wear cowboy hats
I solved the Friday 12/19/2025 New York Times Daily Crossword in 18:23!
December 19, 2025 at 5:27 AM
I solved the Friday 12/19/2025 New York Times Daily Crossword in 18:23!
It is my belief, as a practicing Christian, that the people enabling, carrying out, and cheering on our government’s horrific behavior since January are going to hell
December 19, 2025 at 5:03 AM
It is my belief, as a practicing Christian, that the people enabling, carrying out, and cheering on our government’s horrific behavior since January are going to hell
Oh, for sure. Definitely that and not almost everything else about you that put them off.
December 19, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Oh, for sure. Definitely that and not almost everything else about you that put them off.
Reposted by Dr. JMac
I could see myself voting for someone who campaigns on “I will burn the current White House to the ground and salt the earth where it stood”
December 19, 2025 at 4:28 AM
I could see myself voting for someone who campaigns on “I will burn the current White House to the ground and salt the earth where it stood”
Congrats to whatever enterprising soul convinced a robot to buy it a PS5
December 19, 2025 at 12:58 AM
Congrats to whatever enterprising soul convinced a robot to buy it a PS5
I regret to inform you that I am horny up for the bad guy alien lady from Avatar 3
December 18, 2025 at 10:23 PM
I regret to inform you that I am horny up for the bad guy alien lady from Avatar 3
Honestly, if your doctor shows up for surgery looking like this and you still let him work on you, it's at least partially on you
A French anesthesiologist was sentenced to life in jail on Thursday for intentionally poisoning 30 patients, 12 of whom died. trib.al/3Sn9dbY
December 18, 2025 at 7:04 PM
Honestly, if your doctor shows up for surgery looking like this and you still let him work on you, it's at least partially on you
Ok, which of you weirdos showed Hunger Games to President Grandpa?
Trump announces an "unprecedented four-day athletic event" with "one young man and one young woman from each state and territory"
December 18, 2025 at 5:43 PM
Ok, which of you weirdos showed Hunger Games to President Grandpa?
Doing the sign of the cross has been downgraded to “spectacles…wallet and watch” because the testicles are extra
December 18, 2025 at 5:05 PM
Doing the sign of the cross has been downgraded to “spectacles…wallet and watch” because the testicles are extra
Testicles are extra? That explains why my medical bills are always so high
Dr Oz: "The creation of a penis costs on average in America $150,000 per child ... if you add testicles, that's extra"
December 18, 2025 at 5:02 PM
Testicles are extra? That explains why my medical bills are always so high
I solved the Thursday 12/18/2025 New York Times Daily Crossword in 22:31!
December 18, 2025 at 12:11 PM
I solved the Thursday 12/18/2025 New York Times Daily Crossword in 22:31!
I solved the Wednesday 12/17/2025 New York Times Daily Crossword in 13:59!
December 18, 2025 at 4:41 AM
I solved the Wednesday 12/17/2025 New York Times Daily Crossword in 13:59!
The Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come
December 17, 2025 at 8:04 PM
The Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come
😀 guitar teacher gave me a bag of homemade cookies
🙁 they suck
🙁 they suck
December 17, 2025 at 5:22 PM
😀 guitar teacher gave me a bag of homemade cookies
🙁 they suck
🙁 they suck
Prometheus is an early riser
Scientists found the oldest evidence of human fire-making dating to 400,000 years ago, much earlier than previously thought.
Archaeologists Find Oldest Evidence of Fire-Making
Neanderthals 400,000 years ago were striking flints to make fires, researchers have found.
nyti.ms
December 17, 2025 at 4:20 AM
Prometheus is an early riser
I solved the Tuesday 12/16/2025 New York Times Daily Crossword in 8:29!
December 17, 2025 at 3:15 AM
I solved the Tuesday 12/16/2025 New York Times Daily Crossword in 8:29!
An internet goof that lives rent free in my head and makes me laugh every time is “I also choose this guy’s dead wife”
December 17, 2025 at 2:46 AM
An internet goof that lives rent free in my head and makes me laugh every time is “I also choose this guy’s dead wife”
Best store-bought condiments:
Mayo: Dukes
Ketchup: Heinz
Mustard: Maille
Sour cream: Daisy
BBQ sauce: Blues Hog
Hot sauce: Tabasco (roasted)
Peanut butter: Jif Natural
Honey: Nate’s Honey Co
Pasta sauce: Rao’s
Mayo: Dukes
Ketchup: Heinz
Mustard: Maille
Sour cream: Daisy
BBQ sauce: Blues Hog
Hot sauce: Tabasco (roasted)
Peanut butter: Jif Natural
Honey: Nate’s Honey Co
Pasta sauce: Rao’s
December 17, 2025 at 2:12 AM
Best store-bought condiments:
Mayo: Dukes
Ketchup: Heinz
Mustard: Maille
Sour cream: Daisy
BBQ sauce: Blues Hog
Hot sauce: Tabasco (roasted)
Peanut butter: Jif Natural
Honey: Nate’s Honey Co
Pasta sauce: Rao’s
Mayo: Dukes
Ketchup: Heinz
Mustard: Maille
Sour cream: Daisy
BBQ sauce: Blues Hog
Hot sauce: Tabasco (roasted)
Peanut butter: Jif Natural
Honey: Nate’s Honey Co
Pasta sauce: Rao’s
I’ve had complaints about USPS and UPS in the past but both of them have this: they’ve never broken one of my guitars during shipping, which FedEx has done twice now, and both times to a degree that only speaks to carelessness if not active malfeasance
December 16, 2025 at 4:52 PM
I’ve had complaints about USPS and UPS in the past but both of them have this: they’ve never broken one of my guitars during shipping, which FedEx has done twice now, and both times to a degree that only speaks to carelessness if not active malfeasance