Martha Kelly
@marthakelly.bsky.social
You might know me from stand up, Baskets, Euphoria, or calling people cunts on Twitter. Sorry.
Reposted by Martha Kelly
I got an elliptical a few months ago and the annual cholesterol test confirmed my worst fears: exercise really does work
November 30, 2025 at 5:26 AM
I got an elliptical a few months ago and the annual cholesterol test confirmed my worst fears: exercise really does work
Using the oven for heat because the noise of the actual heater scares the dog and now this guy’s back on his bullshit
November 30, 2025 at 4:09 PM
Using the oven for heat because the noise of the actual heater scares the dog and now this guy’s back on his bullshit
Reposted by Martha Kelly
People will say anything on here. “We used to be a proper country,” no we didn’t. That’s not true.
November 29, 2025 at 6:25 PM
People will say anything on here. “We used to be a proper country,” no we didn’t. That’s not true.
Reposted by Martha Kelly
[I turn on the TV and every channel is showing me being burned in effigy] This can't be good
November 30, 2025 at 12:36 AM
[I turn on the TV and every channel is showing me being burned in effigy] This can't be good
Reposted by Martha Kelly
🎄 We just have to find MELIA a forever home by Christmas 🎄
Heres her bio. Shelter contact information is there. Please read it, maybe you're the one for her. If not repost. Her human is out there. We have to find them. 🤞
⬇️
24petconnect.com/DetailsMain/...
Heres her bio. Shelter contact information is there. Please read it, maybe you're the one for her. If not repost. Her human is out there. We have to find them. 🤞
⬇️
24petconnect.com/DetailsMain/...
November 29, 2025 at 1:36 AM
🎄 We just have to find MELIA a forever home by Christmas 🎄
Heres her bio. Shelter contact information is there. Please read it, maybe you're the one for her. If not repost. Her human is out there. We have to find them. 🤞
⬇️
24petconnect.com/DetailsMain/...
Heres her bio. Shelter contact information is there. Please read it, maybe you're the one for her. If not repost. Her human is out there. We have to find them. 🤞
⬇️
24petconnect.com/DetailsMain/...
Reposted by Martha Kelly
The Citizens United decision has corrupted our government and is destroying our democracy. Here's a way to get rid of it. robertreich.substack.com/p/how-to-get...
How to Get Rid of "Citizens United"
We can do away with it without a new Supreme Court. Nor do we need a constitutional amendment. There’s a far simpler way.
robertreich.substack.com
November 29, 2025 at 11:34 PM
The Citizens United decision has corrupted our government and is destroying our democracy. Here's a way to get rid of it. robertreich.substack.com/p/how-to-get...
Honestly every tv show and movie would be better if you added Sarah Snook and Dakota Fanning
November 30, 2025 at 1:13 AM
Honestly every tv show and movie would be better if you added Sarah Snook and Dakota Fanning
Besieged by a bug from the Snuggle region of Europe
November 29, 2025 at 10:41 PM
Besieged by a bug from the Snuggle region of Europe
Reposted by Martha Kelly
Mike Johnson, whose claim to fame is a ridiculous selfie with Kid Rock, is furious that we’re pushing to force a vote on extending tax credits. You know what to do:
Tell Congress: Support discharge petition to force vote on ACA tax credits
Contact Congress today!
actionnetwork.org
November 29, 2025 at 12:39 AM
Mike Johnson, whose claim to fame is a ridiculous selfie with Kid Rock, is furious that we’re pushing to force a vote on extending tax credits. You know what to do:
Reposted by Martha Kelly
Finally getting some theological clarity on the ethics of reclining in one’s plane seat
November 29, 2025 at 12:13 PM
Finally getting some theological clarity on the ethics of reclining in one’s plane seat
Watching a show on Peacock and not one commercial is for a brand I’ve ever seen before am I hallucinating
November 29, 2025 at 5:25 AM
Watching a show on Peacock and not one commercial is for a brand I’ve ever seen before am I hallucinating
The number of people in LA who think it’s legal to deliberately drive your car into somebody if you technically have the right of way is wild
November 28, 2025 at 9:07 PM
The number of people in LA who think it’s legal to deliberately drive your car into somebody if you technically have the right of way is wild
Reposted by Martha Kelly
Can someone show the White House Press Corpse a montage of the reporters who covered previous administrations, the ones who weren't complete cowards?
“You’re a stupid person” — Trump lashes out at a reporter who presses him on the fact that the suspected DC shooter was actually thoroughly vetted before he was let in the US from Afghanistan
November 28, 2025 at 12:55 AM
Can someone show the White House Press Corpse a montage of the reporters who covered previous administrations, the ones who weren't complete cowards?
The shitting toilet paper bears’ impact on media and culture is growing
Feeling gassy after Thanksgiving? Take a fart walk.
Light exercise after a big meal can help. Whatever you do, resist the urge to lie down.
Light exercise after a big meal can help. Whatever you do, resist the urge to lie down.
Column | Try a ‘fart walk’ to ease the pressure after that big Thanksgiving meal
Whatever you do, resist the urge to lie down.
www.washingtonpost.com
November 28, 2025 at 1:03 AM
The shitting toilet paper bears’ impact on media and culture is growing
Reposted by Martha Kelly
Reposted by Martha Kelly
thinking of her today
November 27, 2025 at 3:07 PM
thinking of her today
Reposted by Martha Kelly
The World’s Goodest Boy(👇) was half Pyr, and I cannot recommend the breed/mixes enough. Friendly, lazy, easy-going nature and usually great with kids (as well as other animals). If you have room in your heart and your yard - take a chance on one of these good boys/girls. You won’t find a better dog.
November 26, 2025 at 5:49 PM
The World’s Goodest Boy(👇) was half Pyr, and I cannot recommend the breed/mixes enough. Friendly, lazy, easy-going nature and usually great with kids (as well as other animals). If you have room in your heart and your yard - take a chance on one of these good boys/girls. You won’t find a better dog.
Barry acts like an animatronic guy
November 26, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Barry acts like an animatronic guy
Reposted by Martha Kelly
Lots of people sharing this clip because it's funny and cathartic but I also genuinely believe it's important.
We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷
November 26, 2025 at 4:07 PM
Lots of people sharing this clip because it's funny and cathartic but I also genuinely believe it's important.
We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
We have to win the narrative battle between "I live in a corrupt society and that's just how it is" and "I live in a corrupt society and we are going to defeat and humiliate these ghouls."
Reposted by Martha Kelly
Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷
November 26, 2025 at 1:04 PM
Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷
I have once again been delighted by an AI video of a cat leading the police on a wild car chase. They can’t keep getting away with this.
November 26, 2025 at 4:46 PM
I have once again been delighted by an AI video of a cat leading the police on a wild car chase. They can’t keep getting away with this.
Reposted by Martha Kelly
If the state of Delaware prohibited companies incorporated there from spending on elections in any way, Citizens United would be dead in the water.
Delaware incorporates more companies than any other state.
It’s a blue state. Let’s get cracking on moving Delaware lawmakers on this!
Delaware incorporates more companies than any other state.
It’s a blue state. Let’s get cracking on moving Delaware lawmakers on this!
November 26, 2025 at 12:21 PM
If the state of Delaware prohibited companies incorporated there from spending on elections in any way, Citizens United would be dead in the water.
Delaware incorporates more companies than any other state.
It’s a blue state. Let’s get cracking on moving Delaware lawmakers on this!
Delaware incorporates more companies than any other state.
It’s a blue state. Let’s get cracking on moving Delaware lawmakers on this!
Hee hee ha ha grok says bad words I’m a genius inventor
Everything about this might be the saddest thing I’ve ever seen
November 24, 2025 at 4:04 PM
Hee hee ha ha grok says bad words I’m a genius inventor
Reposted by Martha Kelly
i have a similar rule for friends and colleagues: engage in human trafficking up to sixteen times, that's all well and good. seventeen? you done crossed a line, son.
November 24, 2025 at 2:27 AM
i have a similar rule for friends and colleagues: engage in human trafficking up to sixteen times, that's all well and good. seventeen? you done crossed a line, son.
Reposted by Martha Kelly
"Men are in trouble, is the solution making them a problem for women and children too"
November 24, 2025 at 2:42 PM
"Men are in trouble, is the solution making them a problem for women and children too"