Matthew Highton
@matthighton.bsky.social
Comedian and maker of nonsense.
Pinned
Matthew Highton
@matthighton.bsky.social
· Nov 14
Okay Bluesky, this is the greatest thing I have ever made and now it’s here for you. Mr Blobby in the Virtual Insanity video.
Reposted by Matthew Highton
A story in three parts
October 16, 2025 at 3:33 PM
A story in three parts
I just finished working for them after 2 1/2 years making stuff for their socials. I can not describe how cool some of the behind the scenes stuff is. Theres so many things the public will never see the light of day that designers have made. Nerd heaven.
February 4, 2026 at 8:43 AM
I just finished working for them after 2 1/2 years making stuff for their socials. I can not describe how cool some of the behind the scenes stuff is. Theres so many things the public will never see the light of day that designers have made. Nerd heaven.
Genuinely think the iPhone weather app gets you through winter by always promising snow less than a week away but when you get near it goes “actually it was just cold rain. But honestly next week. I swear.”
February 3, 2026 at 11:57 PM
Genuinely think the iPhone weather app gets you through winter by always promising snow less than a week away but when you get near it goes “actually it was just cold rain. But honestly next week. I swear.”
“With all six Stones, I could simply snap my fingers. They would all cease to exist. If I clap half of them become monkeys, but in people clothes. If I tap. Double people. And if I fart, half the planet farts, but on the same side and so it goes slowly towards the sun. I call that stinky mercy.”
February 3, 2026 at 8:17 PM
“With all six Stones, I could simply snap my fingers. They would all cease to exist. If I clap half of them become monkeys, but in people clothes. If I tap. Double people. And if I fart, half the planet farts, but on the same side and so it goes slowly towards the sun. I call that stinky mercy.”
Reposted by Matthew Highton
The Room Next Door - Donald Trump and the New Guy
Only on YouTube.
Only on YouTube.
The Room Next Door - Donald Trump and the New Guy
YouTube video by Michael Spicer
youtu.be
February 2, 2026 at 8:25 AM
The Room Next Door - Donald Trump and the New Guy
Only on YouTube.
Only on YouTube.
Reposted by Matthew Highton
Peter Mandelson will return in... AVENGERS: DOOMSDAY
February 3, 2026 at 3:12 PM
Peter Mandelson will return in... AVENGERS: DOOMSDAY
Reposted by Matthew Highton
BREAKING: Viewers of “Melania” Documentary Receive Call Telling Them They Will Die in 7 Days
February 3, 2026 at 7:02 AM
BREAKING: Viewers of “Melania” Documentary Receive Call Telling Them They Will Die in 7 Days
Aint no law that says you can't look chic busting criminals.
February 3, 2026 at 12:51 PM
Aint no law that says you can't look chic busting criminals.
I had to google this but he's called Pedro Elias Garzon Delvaux. He was the Louve detective (nearly sent that as love detective haha).
February 3, 2026 at 12:51 PM
I had to google this but he's called Pedro Elias Garzon Delvaux. He was the Louve detective (nearly sent that as love detective haha).
Oh I know. Popularist fluff. Meaningless.
February 3, 2026 at 12:37 PM
Oh I know. Popularist fluff. Meaningless.
Breaking: The number 1 detective in Paris has been dispatched to Elon Musk's offices.
February 3, 2026 at 12:25 PM
Breaking: The number 1 detective in Paris has been dispatched to Elon Musk's offices.
I'm sure they will be capped. 🙃🤡
February 3, 2026 at 12:23 PM
I'm sure they will be capped. 🙃🤡
Alcohol actually cures all ailments. That’s just science.
February 3, 2026 at 12:09 PM
Alcohol actually cures all ailments. That’s just science.
Everything you have.
February 3, 2026 at 11:53 AM
Everything you have.
Nigel Farage is gonna cut pint prices by 5p. Finally a pint for under £9.40 in central London!
February 3, 2026 at 11:50 AM
Nigel Farage is gonna cut pint prices by 5p. Finally a pint for under £9.40 in central London!
Weird we all grew up and stopped celebrating Opposite Day.
February 1, 2026 at 10:18 PM
Weird we all grew up and stopped celebrating Opposite Day.
Reposted by Matthew Highton
Coming out of January like:
February 1, 2026 at 3:49 PM
Coming out of January like:
Coming out of January like:
an old man with a beard and a crown on his head .
ALT: an old man with a beard and a crown on his head .
media.tenor.com
February 1, 2026 at 9:55 AM
Coming out of January like:
Reposted by Matthew Highton
Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the last Dúnedain and Isildur's heir.
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the last Dúnedain and Isildur's heir.
January 30, 2026 at 5:32 PM
Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the last Dúnedain and Isildur's heir.
My life got flipped, turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became the last Dúnedain and Isildur's heir.
Reposted by Matthew Highton
If Bilbo had Chat GPT
January 27, 2026 at 4:24 PM
If Bilbo had Chat GPT
😂 I thought it looked like an advert you see only on a plane.
January 30, 2026 at 9:08 PM
😂 I thought it looked like an advert you see only on a plane.
Ahhh man. Catherine O’Hara 😔 What an absolute talent. Just stole every minute she was on screen and seemed to still be getting better and funnier every year. 💔
January 30, 2026 at 8:13 PM
Ahhh man. Catherine O’Hara 😔 What an absolute talent. Just stole every minute she was on screen and seemed to still be getting better and funnier every year. 💔
This was doing alright but have redone for correct spelling of heir. Goddamn me. Goddamn these catchy lyrics.
January 30, 2026 at 5:32 PM
This was doing alright but have redone for correct spelling of heir. Goddamn me. Goddamn these catchy lyrics.