Matthew Highton
@matthighton.bsky.social
Comedian and maker of nonsense.
Pinned
Matthew Highton
@matthighton.bsky.social
· Nov 14
Okay Bluesky, this is the greatest thing I have ever made and now it’s here for you. Mr Blobby in the Virtual Insanity video.
Been loading some old stuff up over on Threads so gonna pop it here too. Many of you will have seen these things many times. Many of you will be experiencing it for the first time. Either way, the trauma is the same.
February 4, 2026 at 4:51 PM
Been loading some old stuff up over on Threads so gonna pop it here too. Many of you will have seen these things many times. Many of you will be experiencing it for the first time. Either way, the trauma is the same.
Here’s that wholesome episode of Teletubbies where Pennywise visits.
February 4, 2026 at 4:50 PM
Here’s that wholesome episode of Teletubbies where Pennywise visits.
Person in charge of the office fire alarm test:
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
Hold...
Hold...
Not yet...
*everyone starts to get up and walk out
STOP!
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
Hold...
Hold...
Not yet...
*everyone starts to get up and walk out
STOP!
February 4, 2026 at 2:45 PM
Person in charge of the office fire alarm test:
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
Hold...
Hold...
Not yet...
*everyone starts to get up and walk out
STOP!
Wait for it...
Wait for it...
Hold...
Hold...
Not yet...
*everyone starts to get up and walk out
STOP!
Reposted by Matthew Highton
There's something very wrong with Matthew
Timeline break: Here's the Dolmio Family doing the "funny how" scene from Goodfellas.
February 4, 2026 at 12:02 PM
There's something very wrong with Matthew
Have to agree tbh
February 4, 2026 at 12:05 PM
Have to agree tbh
Timeline break: Here's the Dolmio Family doing the "funny how" scene from Goodfellas.
February 4, 2026 at 11:57 AM
Timeline break: Here's the Dolmio Family doing the "funny how" scene from Goodfellas.
Reposted by Matthew Highton
A story in three parts
October 16, 2025 at 3:33 PM
A story in three parts
I just finished working for them after 2 1/2 years making stuff for their socials. I can not describe how cool some of the behind the scenes stuff is. Theres so many things the public will never see the light of day that designers have made. Nerd heaven.
February 4, 2026 at 8:43 AM
I just finished working for them after 2 1/2 years making stuff for their socials. I can not describe how cool some of the behind the scenes stuff is. Theres so many things the public will never see the light of day that designers have made. Nerd heaven.
Genuinely think the iPhone weather app gets you through winter by always promising snow less than a week away but when you get near it goes “actually it was just cold rain. But honestly next week. I swear.”
February 3, 2026 at 11:57 PM
Genuinely think the iPhone weather app gets you through winter by always promising snow less than a week away but when you get near it goes “actually it was just cold rain. But honestly next week. I swear.”
“With all six Stones, I could simply snap my fingers. They would all cease to exist. If I clap half of them become monkeys, but in people clothes. If I tap. Double people. And if I fart, half the planet farts, but on the same side and so it goes slowly towards the sun. I call that stinky mercy.”
February 3, 2026 at 8:17 PM
“With all six Stones, I could simply snap my fingers. They would all cease to exist. If I clap half of them become monkeys, but in people clothes. If I tap. Double people. And if I fart, half the planet farts, but on the same side and so it goes slowly towards the sun. I call that stinky mercy.”
Reposted by Matthew Highton
The Room Next Door - Donald Trump and the New Guy
Only on YouTube.
Only on YouTube.
The Room Next Door - Donald Trump and the New Guy
YouTube video by Michael Spicer
youtu.be
February 2, 2026 at 8:25 AM
The Room Next Door - Donald Trump and the New Guy
Only on YouTube.
Only on YouTube.
Reposted by Matthew Highton
Peter Mandelson will return in... AVENGERS: DOOMSDAY
February 3, 2026 at 3:12 PM
Peter Mandelson will return in... AVENGERS: DOOMSDAY
Reposted by Matthew Highton
BREAKING: Viewers of “Melania” Documentary Receive Call Telling Them They Will Die in 7 Days
February 3, 2026 at 7:02 AM
BREAKING: Viewers of “Melania” Documentary Receive Call Telling Them They Will Die in 7 Days
Aint no law that says you can't look chic busting criminals.
February 3, 2026 at 12:51 PM
Aint no law that says you can't look chic busting criminals.
I had to google this but he's called Pedro Elias Garzon Delvaux. He was the Louve detective (nearly sent that as love detective haha).
February 3, 2026 at 12:51 PM
I had to google this but he's called Pedro Elias Garzon Delvaux. He was the Louve detective (nearly sent that as love detective haha).
Oh I know. Popularist fluff. Meaningless.
February 3, 2026 at 12:37 PM
Oh I know. Popularist fluff. Meaningless.
Breaking: The number 1 detective in Paris has been dispatched to Elon Musk's offices.
February 3, 2026 at 12:25 PM
Breaking: The number 1 detective in Paris has been dispatched to Elon Musk's offices.
I'm sure they will be capped. 🙃🤡
February 3, 2026 at 12:23 PM
I'm sure they will be capped. 🙃🤡
Alcohol actually cures all ailments. That’s just science.
February 3, 2026 at 12:09 PM
Alcohol actually cures all ailments. That’s just science.
Everything you have.
February 3, 2026 at 11:53 AM
Everything you have.
Nigel Farage is gonna cut pint prices by 5p. Finally a pint for under £9.40 in central London!
February 3, 2026 at 11:50 AM
Nigel Farage is gonna cut pint prices by 5p. Finally a pint for under £9.40 in central London!