Chris Boyd
@paperghost.bsky.social
Award winning security researcher | 7 time Microsoft MVP | Google Hall of Fame | Music and video | UK Immigration (family reunion)
https://soundcloud.com/umawing
https://soundcloud.com/umawing
Pinned
and, may i add, lmao
November 25, 2025 at 7:56 PM
and, may i add, lmao
the sentence is one sequel
November 25, 2025 at 6:56 PM
the sentence is one sequel
oh also I'm not allowed to go diving or my head will explode
November 25, 2025 at 5:59 PM
oh also I'm not allowed to go diving or my head will explode
(licking random mushrooms) ah yeah that'll do it
November 25, 2025 at 5:55 PM
(licking random mushrooms) ah yeah that'll do it
finally had my specialist appointment regarding my ears and described how my tinnitus almost disappeared after my double ear infection/eustachian tube disaster, and he simply has no idea why (it should have gone worse) and said I'm a medical mystery. hopefully an international man of medical mystery
November 25, 2025 at 5:49 PM
finally had my specialist appointment regarding my ears and described how my tinnitus almost disappeared after my double ear infection/eustachian tube disaster, and he simply has no idea why (it should have gone worse) and said I'm a medical mystery. hopefully an international man of medical mystery
Reposted by Chris Boyd
I miss when Twitter was truly great like the time a guy got upset at someone calling out a cricket team and started explaining how bowling worked and at the end OP was like "thanks for explaining btw I hold the world record for most career outs in cricket history"
November 25, 2025 at 1:36 PM
I miss when Twitter was truly great like the time a guy got upset at someone calling out a cricket team and started explaining how bowling worked and at the end OP was like "thanks for explaining btw I hold the world record for most career outs in cricket history"
Reposted by Chris Boyd
A tax on milkshakes is some sort of Plankton from SpongeBob SquarePants bastard move
November 25, 2025 at 3:51 PM
A tax on milkshakes is some sort of Plankton from SpongeBob SquarePants bastard move
i like how everything in the clip becomes more wrong as you keep watching, especially when the door finally opens
RAINBOW (1972) was originally conceived as Britain's answer to Sesame Street, and Geoffrey, George, Zippy and Bungle would eventually become household names. But the first series featured a maniacal, wide-eyed, terrifying prototype of cuddly old Bungle Bear...
November 25, 2025 at 1:14 PM
i like how everything in the clip becomes more wrong as you keep watching, especially when the door finally opens
Reposted by Chris Boyd
No one at the rap battle will wait for me to type my prompts
November 25, 2025 at 12:24 PM
No one at the rap battle will wait for me to type my prompts
no this is great. if i had my banana hat layer to hand i'd have it perched upon your head in nanoseconds
November 25, 2025 at 12:02 PM
no this is great. if i had my banana hat layer to hand i'd have it perched upon your head in nanoseconds
i'm going to try this if i see it. just pop the can open, take a big swig, and then either go YAY or REMEMBER ME AS A HERO ARGH
November 25, 2025 at 11:19 AM
i'm going to try this if i see it. just pop the can open, take a big swig, and then either go YAY or REMEMBER ME AS A HERO ARGH
"the UK has de facto open borders + limited deterrence"
someone rescue this person from the gas leak
someone rescue this person from the gas leak
November 25, 2025 at 11:10 AM
"the UK has de facto open borders + limited deterrence"
someone rescue this person from the gas leak
someone rescue this person from the gas leak
and "getting a family" is largely meaningless, as there is no absolute right to family life in the UK, not even if you're married to a british citizen. you can have as many kids as you want while overstaying; it's not necessarily going to land you indefinite leave to remain (not "settled status")
November 25, 2025 at 11:08 AM
and "getting a family" is largely meaningless, as there is no absolute right to family life in the UK, not even if you're married to a british citizen. you can have as many kids as you want while overstaying; it's not necessarily going to land you indefinite leave to remain (not "settled status")
we're an *island*, and we don't have "de facto open borders". most people here without permission are overstayers who then walk into the hostile environment of right to rent, right to work, and endless other systems designed to make their life largely non functional for as long as they're in it
November 25, 2025 at 11:06 AM
we're an *island*, and we don't have "de facto open borders". most people here without permission are overstayers who then walk into the hostile environment of right to rent, right to work, and endless other systems designed to make their life largely non functional for as long as they're in it
that's real britain
November 25, 2025 at 10:57 AM
that's real britain
the taste is too enchanted/cursed to work when ported to any other kind of food i think
November 25, 2025 at 9:57 AM
the taste is too enchanted/cursed to work when ported to any other kind of food i think
struggled not to say the name on the visa like some sort of deflating helium balloon but i think i got away with it
November 25, 2025 at 9:55 AM
struggled not to say the name on the visa like some sort of deflating helium balloon but i think i got away with it
the gingerbread flavoured doritos are still giving me nightmares. possibly the worst thing i've ever tasted
November 25, 2025 at 9:47 AM
the gingerbread flavoured doritos are still giving me nightmares. possibly the worst thing i've ever tasted
i just read both screenshots out to my wife, in full "i used to do shakespeare on stage, you know" voice, and she had no idea where i was going with it. then i got to the last bit, coughed up a lung and if she hadn't been sitting down she'd have fallen over
November 25, 2025 at 9:46 AM
i just read both screenshots out to my wife, in full "i used to do shakespeare on stage, you know" voice, and she had no idea where i was going with it. then i got to the last bit, coughed up a lung and if she hadn't been sitting down she'd have fallen over
I made a very audible muppet style squeak of amusement in the street and I'd do it again
November 25, 2025 at 9:11 AM
I made a very audible muppet style squeak of amusement in the street and I'd do it again
Reposted by Chris Boyd
Excellent
![R. H. Bing (October 20, 1914 โ April 28, 1986)[1] was an American mathematician who worked mainly in the areas of geometric topology and continuum theory.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:cyyd366g3hrxp5rynixm2mm3/bafkreid62wy3dekb2kzbisjfdlimlb35j4rlgew5iof7vi32byfszmg26a@jpeg)
![Bing's father was named Rupert Henry, but Bing's mother thought that "Rupert Henry" was too British for Texas. Thus she compromised by abbreviating it to R. H.[5] Consequently, R. H. does not stand for a first or middle name.
When Bing was applying for a visa, he was requested not to use initials. He explained that his name was really "R-only H-only Bing", and ended up receiving a visa made out to "Ronly Honly Bing".](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:cyyd366g3hrxp5rynixm2mm3/bafkreigmfj53q4uy33spga2bxdkllqm3ag5sffovg5g7ddmu3vqzkb6k24@jpeg)
November 25, 2025 at 9:09 AM
Excellent
(20 seconds later): I've died
November 25, 2025 at 9:01 AM
(20 seconds later): I've died
Reposted by Chris Boyd
danny dyer's kryptonite homunculus
November 25, 2025 at 8:17 AM
danny dyer's kryptonite homunculus