Patrick Samphire 🏴
@patricksamphire.bsky.social
Fantasy writer | Freelance developmental editor | Former physicist. #SPFBO/#BBNYA finalist. He/him.
Around the web and my books: http://linktr.ee/patricksamphire
🏳️⚧️ rights are human rights
Around the web and my books: http://linktr.ee/patricksamphire
🏳️⚧️ rights are human rights
Pinned
Lots of new friends on Bluesky. Hello! In case you haven't come across me before, I'm a fantasy writer, and these are all the books I've published so far.
patricksamphire.com/books
patricksamphire.com/books
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
Every economy op-ed writer: No see, you can't buy a house because you buy too many avocado toasts but you're hurting the economy by not buying a new $1,000 phone each year. I am very smart. Also don't ask me about my emails with Epstein.
November 25, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Every economy op-ed writer: No see, you can't buy a house because you buy too many avocado toasts but you're hurting the economy by not buying a new $1,000 phone each year. I am very smart. Also don't ask me about my emails with Epstein.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
We’re not small business owners, ffs - we’re independent contractors, and we are routinely robbed by the world’s dumbest dingbats.
![A quote-tweet with the profile blocked out because I won’t be accused of sending flying monkeys at this digital turd.
counterpoint: pirate everything all the time. pirate a sandwich. download a car. abscond from from small business owner mindset with your brain
[High Priestess, Low Patie... • @cherie... • 14h
Re: previous post - People who steal art of any kind are assholes, full stop. If *you* deserve to be paid for your labor, so do I - and so does everybody else; this means writers, visual artists, musicians, and every other category of People Who Make Things.]
• • •
every time vulgar leftism pipes in from the sidelines of petit bourgeoisdom i am forced to become 8.75% more marxist](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:x2ssvkga34xug334b66hvrje/bafkreigp2f33rtfu62kqjygnsxhg3jxxs6udwuyisipmyqrh5ew4c6kbyi@jpeg)
November 25, 2025 at 7:25 PM
We’re not small business owners, ffs - we’re independent contractors, and we are routinely robbed by the world’s dumbest dingbats.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
I think it’s time to put this one back out into the ether, friends
Come and learn about how the tropes undergirding anti-Jewish hatred and conspiracy theories as they exist today came to be…
Come and learn about how the tropes undergirding anti-Jewish hatred and conspiracy theories as they exist today came to be…
The Antisemitism Post (tm)
Gotta get the history to know where the tropes live in the discourse today.
www.lifeisasacredtext.com
November 25, 2025 at 3:12 PM
I think it’s time to put this one back out into the ether, friends
Come and learn about how the tropes undergirding anti-Jewish hatred and conspiracy theories as they exist today came to be…
Come and learn about how the tropes undergirding anti-Jewish hatred and conspiracy theories as they exist today came to be…
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
I’ve been running around asking tech execs and academics if language was the same as intelligence for over a year now - and, well, it isn’t. @benjaminjriley.bsky.social explains how the bubble is built on ignoring cutting-edge research into the science of thought www.theverge.com/ai-artificia...
November 25, 2025 at 1:54 PM
I’ve been running around asking tech execs and academics if language was the same as intelligence for over a year now - and, well, it isn’t. @benjaminjriley.bsky.social explains how the bubble is built on ignoring cutting-edge research into the science of thought www.theverge.com/ai-artificia...
Also, we have had many, many, many trials of UBI that show people don't stop working. But they may demand more respect and flexibility in jobs, which is what the critics really do not want.
Always grinds my gears when people say "No one would work drudge jobs if there was a UBI"
But even staying completely capitalist, I disagree. If I received a baseline living-wage UBI, and then I was offered REWARDS for drudge jobs, I'd take it! I want to save up for treats and travel and hobbies!
But even staying completely capitalist, I disagree. If I received a baseline living-wage UBI, and then I was offered REWARDS for drudge jobs, I'd take it! I want to save up for treats and travel and hobbies!
November 25, 2025 at 6:37 PM
Also, we have had many, many, many trials of UBI that show people don't stop working. But they may demand more respect and flexibility in jobs, which is what the critics really do not want.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
As I commented at the time, just ask your loved ones what they want. If you don't know and you can't ask them, maybe you don't need to buy them anything, because you don't sound that close.
Don’t know what to buy your loved ones for Christmas? Just ask ChatGPT
Don’t know what to buy your loved ones for Christmas? Just ask ChatGPT
Santa has a new little helper. But can an AI-powered shopping assistant really master the subtle art of gift giving?
Some people love buying Christmas presents. Polly Arrowsmith starts making a note of what her friends and family like, then hunts for…
www.theguardian.com
November 25, 2025 at 6:33 PM
As I commented at the time, just ask your loved ones what they want. If you don't know and you can't ask them, maybe you don't need to buy them anything, because you don't sound that close.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
one of the coolest things about ChatGPT is how you can actually just never use it. you can fill your whole entire life with simply not once using it. it's incredible.
November 25, 2025 at 4:15 PM
one of the coolest things about ChatGPT is how you can actually just never use it. you can fill your whole entire life with simply not once using it. it's incredible.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
First book is Snowspelled by Stephanie Burgis. Cozy gaslampish fantasy romance, fey antagonists (I always love this), snowy setting to get in the wintry mood, and it's under 200 pages.
Trying to read five more books in the last five weeks of the year. My library hold should come in at the very end, but I want the other four to be books I already own. Probably novellas, given the busyness of things. I need to organize my ebooks and figure out what I actually have, and where.
November 25, 2025 at 1:11 PM
First book is Snowspelled by Stephanie Burgis. Cozy gaslampish fantasy romance, fey antagonists (I always love this), snowy setting to get in the wintry mood, and it's under 200 pages.
Moving house is no fun. I do not recommend it if you have any choice in the matter at all.
November 25, 2025 at 5:26 PM
Moving house is no fun. I do not recommend it if you have any choice in the matter at all.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
Not really my heart
Just somebody's heart
This year
If the cops should appear
Please tell them that you don't know me
I gave you my heart
Not really my heart
Just somebody's heart
This year
If the cops should appear
Please tell them that you don't know me
December 4, 2024 at 11:45 PM
Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
Not really my heart
Just somebody's heart
This year
If the cops should appear
Please tell them that you don't know me
I gave you my heart
Not really my heart
Just somebody's heart
This year
If the cops should appear
Please tell them that you don't know me
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
Important update
November 25, 2025 at 3:10 PM
Important update
It is really, really important to the wealthy and their simps to persuade you that there is no alternative at all to the current economic system and that this is what we all have to live with. It's nonsense, but it's the thing that keeps them rich and in power.
Surely the City can come up with something more interesting to keep trying to attack me with?
Cut bills. Tax billionaires.
Join.greenparty.org.uk
Cut bills. Tax billionaires.
Join.greenparty.org.uk
November 25, 2025 at 5:25 PM
It is really, really important to the wealthy and their simps to persuade you that there is no alternative at all to the current economic system and that this is what we all have to live with. It's nonsense, but it's the thing that keeps them rich and in power.
One of the biggest problems of new fantasy writers (and writers in some other genres, I assume) is doing too much world building and then thinking that it's necessary to share it with the reader.
Unsolicited writing advice, no. 33788:
Don't front-load your work with unnecessary backstory and intricate worldbuilding. Give your readers only as much as they need to engage with the plot and characters, and let them discover the rest as and when they need it...
Don't front-load your work with unnecessary backstory and intricate worldbuilding. Give your readers only as much as they need to engage with the plot and characters, and let them discover the rest as and when they need it...
November 25, 2025 at 5:22 PM
One of the biggest problems of new fantasy writers (and writers in some other genres, I assume) is doing too much world building and then thinking that it's necessary to share it with the reader.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
The best thing I learned from Macaulay Culkin at last night’s Home Alone screening is that his 4yo son loves the movie, thinks of himself as Kevin, and has no idea that that’s his dad. Culkin is attempting to hide that fact for as long as possible
a young boy is smiling and says `` i made my family disappear '' .
ALT: a young boy is smiling and says `` i made my family disappear '' .
media.tenor.com
November 25, 2025 at 3:45 PM
The best thing I learned from Macaulay Culkin at last night’s Home Alone screening is that his 4yo son loves the movie, thinks of himself as Kevin, and has no idea that that’s his dad. Culkin is attempting to hide that fact for as long as possible
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
I'll wade in, I guess. Please do read the alt text.
November 25, 2025 at 1:52 PM
I'll wade in, I guess. Please do read the alt text.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
NEW: AI “recipe slop” is overrunning search and social. Food creators say Google’s AI Overviews and glossy fake food pics are drowning out real, tested recipes — collapsing traffic and setting home cooks up for disaster, especially this Thanksgiving.
Gift link: www.bloomberg.com/news/article...
Gift link: www.bloomberg.com/news/article...
AI Slop Recipes Are Taking Over the Internet -- And Thanksgiving Dinner
Food bloggers see traffic dip as home cooks turn to AI, inspired by impossible pictures
www.bloomberg.com
November 25, 2025 at 3:16 PM
NEW: AI “recipe slop” is overrunning search and social. Food creators say Google’s AI Overviews and glossy fake food pics are drowning out real, tested recipes — collapsing traffic and setting home cooks up for disaster, especially this Thanksgiving.
Gift link: www.bloomberg.com/news/article...
Gift link: www.bloomberg.com/news/article...
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
Israel, which has obliterated most of Palestine’s archeological and heritage sites, including ancient churches, mosques, and temples, has suddenly discovered an urge to protect one from Palestinian ‘neglect’. It just so happens to be in the West Bank.
www.timesofisrael.com/israel-begin...
www.timesofisrael.com/israel-begin...
Israel begins seizing 1,800 dunams of West Bank land to develop archaeological site
Civil Administration says development legal, taking place amid 'neglect' of site by Palestinians; Peace Now: 'Government's lust for dispossession and annexation is insatiable'
www.timesofisrael.com
November 25, 2025 at 7:07 AM
Israel, which has obliterated most of Palestine’s archeological and heritage sites, including ancient churches, mosques, and temples, has suddenly discovered an urge to protect one from Palestinian ‘neglect’. It just so happens to be in the West Bank.
www.timesofisrael.com/israel-begin...
www.timesofisrael.com/israel-begin...
Me too. When people boycott Amazon, they very rarely switch to buying their independently published books elsewhere. They just stop buying them and buy books from the big 5 publishers instead.
Hey #weaintbuyingit folks: My books are available worldwide through other stores (and libraries) besides Amazon, but Amazon has made up 95% of my sales (and the runner up is @queerliblib.bsky.social 💙)
When boycott waves happen, I haven't seen uptick in Kobo or B&N - I just see drops in all sales.
When boycott waves happen, I haven't seen uptick in Kobo or B&N - I just see drops in all sales.
November 25, 2025 at 1:13 PM
Me too. When people boycott Amazon, they very rarely switch to buying their independently published books elsewhere. They just stop buying them and buy books from the big 5 publishers instead.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
Today I learned that stalking a 17 year old girl, writing up a 400 page 'dossier' about her, falsely reporting her to the police and smashing her phone does not constitute 'harassment'.
One wonders what *would*.
One wonders what *would*.
Graham Linehan cleared of harassment but guilty of criminal damage to trans activist's phone
Graham Linehan cleared of harassment but guilty of criminal damage to trans activist's phone
Father Ted creator Graham Linehan has been found guilty of criminal damage to the phone of a trans activist but not guilty of harassment.
news.sky.com
November 25, 2025 at 11:40 AM
Today I learned that stalking a 17 year old girl, writing up a 400 page 'dossier' about her, falsely reporting her to the police and smashing her phone does not constitute 'harassment'.
One wonders what *would*.
One wonders what *would*.
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
Guys I have terrible news - this post has gone viral on Facebook, promoting hundreds of rage-filled comments from people who have taken it very seriously indeed. And, most annoyingly, the Autism Parents have found it!!
Mary Walker, 9, who has always displayed autistic traits, was miraculously fixed by her parents insisting that she stop it at once.
Read this and other exclusive articles on Patreon: www.patreon.com/posts/119410...
Read this and other exclusive articles on Patreon: www.patreon.com/posts/119410...
November 25, 2025 at 10:40 AM
Guys I have terrible news - this post has gone viral on Facebook, promoting hundreds of rage-filled comments from people who have taken it very seriously indeed. And, most annoyingly, the Autism Parents have found it!!
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
Reposted by Patrick Samphire 🏴
OH. COME. ON.
November 24, 2025 at 1:27 PM
OH. COME. ON.
Yes. The simple promise of a review will get you as many books as you could ever read, and all you're being asked is to add a review to goodreads/Amazon or somewhere similar. Five minutes of your time.
Once again reminding people that indie authors are almost always down to hand out review copies.
There's no reason to pirate their books.
#booksky
There's no reason to pirate their books.
#booksky
November 25, 2025 at 11:38 AM
Yes. The simple promise of a review will get you as many books as you could ever read, and all you're being asked is to add a review to goodreads/Amazon or somewhere similar. Five minutes of your time.