Chris Nelson
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robonelson.bsky.social
Chris Nelson
@robonelson.bsky.social
LFK silly man and multiple term Comedy Mayor. 1/2 of Double Deuce Podcast. More machine than man, more man than potato, more potato than god.
If Sadie Sink is playing Jean Grey in Spider-man: Brand New Day, I hope they recreate this scene
February 5, 2026 at 5:07 AM
February 3, 2026 at 2:26 AM
Time travel checklist: 1) kill Hitler, 2) go to an opium den, 3) bottle and sell Jesus’s wine

Also, super alert listeners may notice I was too stoned to remember which team is representing the NFC in the Super Bowl, but all of the analysis stands!
February 2, 2026 at 1:52 AM
It’s 3pm on a Wednesday, which means the haberdasher is in church
January 26, 2026 at 10:07 AM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
I spent the last year writing a book about the ridiculous demands of what it means to be masculine. But a guy who takes care of people who served our country, asks a woman “are you ok?” When she is in distress and looks out for his vulnerable neighbors seems like a pretty good role model for a man.
January 25, 2026 at 4:23 AM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
YouGov is out with a new poll after ICE killed another person in Minnesota today. Abolishing ICE is now +5 among all adults, and **+12 among independents**

substack.com/@gelliottmor...
January 25, 2026 at 2:10 AM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
You have to read this. Firsthand affidavit from one of the women who was there and recording the video. She talks about how Alex Pretti was directing traffic when she arrived. She watched him be killed in front of her. She's afraid to go home, worried she'll be arrested.
January 25, 2026 at 1:15 AM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
We have reached the point where a judge literally has to order federal law enforcement officials not to destroy or mess with evidence from a homicide scene.
BREAKING: Judge Tostrud -- a Trump appointee — has quickly granted a restraining order, barring the administration from "destroying or altering evidence" taken from today's shooting. storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.us...
January 25, 2026 at 5:32 AM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
They have not earned the benefit of the doubt.
Feels like given DHS making up stories about what we can plainly see in the murder videos, we have to just presume every other death under their purview is also murder.
January 25, 2026 at 5:56 AM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
DHS has been caught in too many lies. Don’t believe anything they say without receipts.

Liam is an innocent bystander. His family is not undocumented.

The Public Schools Superintendent says ICE used the boy as bait. I know who I believe.
January 25, 2026 at 3:55 AM
Wasting their lives, everyone knows JFK was a robot

youtu.be/K7y2xPucnAo?...
January 25, 2026 at 6:00 AM
I thought they smelled bad on the outside.

Release the butthole cut, George Lucas!
January 25, 2026 at 4:08 AM
Try to cultivate a sense of childlike whimsy, nyt spelling bee
January 24, 2026 at 12:34 PM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
Damn McSweeney's always has one loaded in the chamber 🤌
January 19, 2026 at 2:07 PM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
Literally everyone who even vaguely knew what a tariff was said this when they were introduced! You don’t need a team of economists to analyze the situation — no one who lives in reality was confused by this!
“Foreign exporters absorbed only 4% of last year’s U.S. tariff increases by lowering prices, while American consumers and importers absorbed 96%.

“Rather than acting as a tax on foreign producers, the tariffs functioned as a consumption tax on Americans.”

www.wsj.com/economy/trad...
Americans Are the Ones Paying for Tariffs, Study Finds
New research contradicts President Trump’s claim that foreigners are footing the bill.
www.wsj.com
January 20, 2026 at 2:07 AM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
I will 100% guarantee that the decision not to investigate is coming from Stephen Miller. Rationally, doing even a superficial investigation and “clearing” Ross would help them. But for Miller, that would be acknowledging the existence of constraints on his power
An FBI agent conducted an initial review of the Renee Good killing and determined sufficient grounds existed to open a civil rights probe into the actions of the ICE officer who shot her. Justice Department says no inquiry is warranted. @perrystein.bsky.social www.washingtonpost.com/national-sec...
FBI opened probe on Minneapolis shooting; none exists now, Justice Dept. says
After the death of Renée Good in Minneapolis, FBI agents launched a civil rights probe into the shooting. The Justice Department says no such case now exists.
www.washingtonpost.com
January 19, 2026 at 8:20 PM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
We are watching one of the wildest things a nation-state has ever done: A superpower is committing suicide because the GOP Congress is too cowardly to stand up to the Mad King.

This is one of the wildest moments in all of geopolitics ever.
Footage shows Danish troops arriving in Greenland as part of a new military deployment. Among the personnel who landed on the island is Major General Peter H. Boysen, Chief of the Danish Army Command. #Greenland
January 19, 2026 at 10:59 PM
Herpes is a bad brand partner
January 19, 2026 at 6:39 AM
Dogs and cats, living with people, mass hysteria!
January 12, 2026 at 6:11 AM
Chekov’s gun vs Nabokov’s cat
January 5, 2026 at 7:44 AM
Being from the future is no excuse to be a creep
December 29, 2025 at 6:16 AM
That’s how they Clockwork Orange these printers into Terminators!
For real, if you listen to 1 episode of anything this holiday season, it should be this. @willaverill.bsky.social & I capture the essence of what these joyous times really mean, & how their light reflects in every human soul.
December 23, 2025 at 3:14 PM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
This is precisely how fascism works, by grabbing at and taking away a little more freedom whenever events lend themselves to it. Bit by bit you lose your rights, until you turn around and realize the road you're on has been long, and democracy is well behind you over the horizon.
The admin is wasting no crisis... Sec. Kristi Noem said she is suspending the diversity visa lottery program (DV-1) after the Brown University suspect entered the U.S. through it in 2017.
December 19, 2025 at 5:10 AM
Reposted by Chris Nelson
Noem is using the Brown University shooter to end an entire visa program, but it should be noted that Pete Hegseth, just today, murdered more than twice as many people
December 19, 2025 at 5:03 AM
Legally, @willaverill.bsky.social wants to know if it’s still kidnapping if you only take them to get ice cream
December 15, 2025 at 6:23 AM