Soren Bowie
@sorenbowie.bsky.social
Writer at American Dad. Co-host of Quick Question with Soren and Dan.
One game of cards with extended family and everyone’s still suddenly ready to go to bed. They can’t hang with a real athlete. And for the love of god, aunt Janice stop crying, I will replace your piece of shit particle board table on Black Friday. I’m already planning to go fucking HAM at Target.
November 26, 2025 at 5:55 AM
One game of cards with extended family and everyone’s still suddenly ready to go to bed. They can’t hang with a real athlete. And for the love of god, aunt Janice stop crying, I will replace your piece of shit particle board table on Black Friday. I’m already planning to go fucking HAM at Target.
Indian wrestled every kid at the pre-Thanksgiving rager and nearly ripped their little toothpick legs clean off. I always go 100. Some of them tried to tell me not to call it Indian wrestling AFTER they got washed. Just trying to scrape back a win anywhere they can. Fucking soft.
November 26, 2025 at 12:41 AM
Indian wrestled every kid at the pre-Thanksgiving rager and nearly ripped their little toothpick legs clean off. I always go 100. Some of them tried to tell me not to call it Indian wrestling AFTER they got washed. Just trying to scrape back a win anywhere they can. Fucking soft.
At my in-laws for Thanksgiving and it’s crystal clear I’m the strongest guy here. My wife has one uncle who played football but when I threw his walker over the stream behind their house, everyone agreed I can’t be stopped. Alpha.
November 26, 2025 at 12:32 AM
At my in-laws for Thanksgiving and it’s crystal clear I’m the strongest guy here. My wife has one uncle who played football but when I threw his walker over the stream behind their house, everyone agreed I can’t be stopped. Alpha.
One of the most remarkable things about the human condition is that no matter how hard you try, you will never be the absolute best at anything, but you will be the absolute worst at lots of things.
November 23, 2025 at 7:46 PM
One of the most remarkable things about the human condition is that no matter how hard you try, you will never be the absolute best at anything, but you will be the absolute worst at lots of things.
Reposted by Soren Bowie
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 AM
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
When I was seven I won a coloring contest at the grocery store. They gave me a free VHS copy of Peter Pan and put my turkey picture up at checkout. I’ve been chasing that success ever since.
November 20, 2025 at 4:58 PM
When I was seven I won a coloring contest at the grocery store. They gave me a free VHS copy of Peter Pan and put my turkey picture up at checkout. I’ve been chasing that success ever since.
Man who survives exclusively on grinding out grievances with the Democratic Party would ask you stop talking about the most recent grievance and just let it quietly go away.
November 19, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Man who survives exclusively on grinding out grievances with the Democratic Party would ask you stop talking about the most recent grievance and just let it quietly go away.
Everyone is being a little hard on Nuzzi. When your deep introspection yields no notes, why bother to make those notes coherent?
The prose is incoherent & the only way to make it through a paragraph is to rely on the North Star or her self-pitying narcissism. The gist of this graf is “strangers obsess about me, must be because I work so hard,” but it is almost immediate lost in the morass of “typed on notes app while hiking”
November 17, 2025 at 4:55 PM
Everyone is being a little hard on Nuzzi. When your deep introspection yields no notes, why bother to make those notes coherent?
Reposted by Soren Bowie
Just became a legend at the car wash. Showed the guys working there that you can pretend the pressure washing gun is your wiener. They called their boss in and he took a video.
November 17, 2025 at 1:00 AM
Just became a legend at the car wash. Showed the guys working there that you can pretend the pressure washing gun is your wiener. They called their boss in and he took a video.
If I
Wanna take a guy
Home with me tonight
It’s none of your business
And if I
Am tryin to steal a pie
From Whole Foods
That’s none of your business
Wanna take a guy
Home with me tonight
It’s none of your business
And if I
Am tryin to steal a pie
From Whole Foods
That’s none of your business
November 15, 2025 at 9:02 PM
If I
Wanna take a guy
Home with me tonight
It’s none of your business
And if I
Am tryin to steal a pie
From Whole Foods
That’s none of your business
Wanna take a guy
Home with me tonight
It’s none of your business
And if I
Am tryin to steal a pie
From Whole Foods
That’s none of your business
Reposted by Soren Bowie
a lot of people said i was a fool for adopting a chimpanzee while living in an apartment "this is going to be a disaster, your neighbors will hate you" they said, well the chimp died after eating an entire box of dryer sheets so i hope you feel good about bringing that negativity
November 14, 2025 at 2:15 PM
a lot of people said i was a fool for adopting a chimpanzee while living in an apartment "this is going to be a disaster, your neighbors will hate you" they said, well the chimp died after eating an entire box of dryer sheets so i hope you feel good about bringing that negativity
Reposted by Soren Bowie
Everyone, I ouija boarded Lincoln's ghost and he said the new White House bathroom is "too gross to piss in"
November 2, 2025 at 2:23 AM
Everyone, I ouija boarded Lincoln's ghost and he said the new White House bathroom is "too gross to piss in"
Reposted by Soren Bowie
Would like to address the rumours going around about me. They are categorically not true. In fact, I have actually had a few extra ribs added to ensure that sort of thing could never happen, even accidentally.
November 15, 2025 at 12:19 AM
Would like to address the rumours going around about me. They are categorically not true. In fact, I have actually had a few extra ribs added to ensure that sort of thing could never happen, even accidentally.
I can’t wait to see what all the Stranger Things adult children will wear at their third premiere for season 5!
November 14, 2025 at 4:23 PM
I can’t wait to see what all the Stranger Things adult children will wear at their third premiere for season 5!
17 spam calls so far today. 28 by the end of yesterday. 26 the day before. I’m not complaining just bragging.
November 13, 2025 at 7:53 PM
17 spam calls so far today. 28 by the end of yesterday. 26 the day before. I’m not complaining just bragging.
Reposted by Soren Bowie
Welp, that escalated steadily for the last decade.
November 13, 2025 at 5:03 PM
Welp, that escalated steadily for the last decade.
Reading the broken, misspelled gibberish littering the Epstein email release makes me think it must be exhausting to be a pedophile.
November 13, 2025 at 12:19 AM
Reading the broken, misspelled gibberish littering the Epstein email release makes me think it must be exhausting to be a pedophile.
Honestly shame on this psychic. Any huckster worth their magic beans knows better than to get trapped in an if/then scenario.
Kim Kardashian slams psychics who told her she'd pass the bar exam: 'All fucking full of shit'
Kim Kardashian slams psychics who told her she'd pass the bar exam: 'All f---ing full of s---'
'All f---ing full of s---': Kim Kardashian has some choice words for the psychics who predicted she'd pass the bar exam.
ew.com
November 11, 2025 at 5:12 PM
Honestly shame on this psychic. Any huckster worth their magic beans knows better than to get trapped in an if/then scenario.
I think I would gain respect for Trump if I saw him eating effortlessly with chopsticks.
November 11, 2025 at 3:56 AM
I think I would gain respect for Trump if I saw him eating effortlessly with chopsticks.
Terrible morning so far. Tried to power wash the hairs off the inside of urinal with my pee and one was basically stuck on there with glue or something. Still gonna salvage what I can from this day and hit it again after my morning tea.
November 10, 2025 at 6:26 PM
Terrible morning so far. Tried to power wash the hairs off the inside of urinal with my pee and one was basically stuck on there with glue or something. Still gonna salvage what I can from this day and hit it again after my morning tea.
Big thanks to the botany community for letting me name one.
November 10, 2025 at 12:14 AM
Big thanks to the botany community for letting me name one.
Birds that don’t have a good chirp, coo or song should be a different species so I don’t waste my fucking time.
November 7, 2025 at 9:59 PM
Birds that don’t have a good chirp, coo or song should be a different species so I don’t waste my fucking time.
Got a donation email from Kamala Harris saying now more than ever we need to align on what the future of Democratic Party will be. It’s like they’re all allergic to talking about the entire election cycle.
November 6, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Got a donation email from Kamala Harris saying now more than ever we need to align on what the future of Democratic Party will be. It’s like they’re all allergic to talking about the entire election cycle.
I don’t know a lot about politics but it seems bad that Hakeem Jeffries, a NYC congressman and leader of the democratic caucus, hasn’t posted anything since yesterday morning.
November 6, 2025 at 5:36 AM
I don’t know a lot about politics but it seems bad that Hakeem Jeffries, a NYC congressman and leader of the democratic caucus, hasn’t posted anything since yesterday morning.