Spank The Monkey
@spanktm.bsky.social
Australopithecine specialising in arts and entertainment reviews. Longer-form babbling available at https://spank-the-monkey.co.uk.
This may be a bad time to bring it up, but a short film exists that's literally a supercut of all the times Udo Kier has died in movies. jansoldat.wordpress.com/staging-deat...
Staging Death
Films Other Projects About Screenings Contact DE / EN Jan Soldat 2022, experimental, 8’16:9, 24fps, mono, german/english with engl. subtitles Synopsis Udo Kier dies his way through film histo…
jansoldat.wordpress.com
November 24, 2025 at 1:31 PM
This may be a bad time to bring it up, but a short film exists that's literally a supercut of all the times Udo Kier has died in movies. jansoldat.wordpress.com/staging-deat...
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
Two swans in front of his eyes,
Coloured balls in front of his eyes,
It's number one for his Kelly's eye,
Treble six right over his eye,
BINGO MASTER'S BREAK OUT!
Coloured balls in front of his eyes,
It's number one for his Kelly's eye,
Treble six right over his eye,
BINGO MASTER'S BREAK OUT!
November 23, 2025 at 11:04 AM
Two swans in front of his eyes,
Coloured balls in front of his eyes,
It's number one for his Kelly's eye,
Treble six right over his eye,
BINGO MASTER'S BREAK OUT!
Coloured balls in front of his eyes,
It's number one for his Kelly's eye,
Treble six right over his eye,
BINGO MASTER'S BREAK OUT!
Part three of the report on our summer trip to Cyprus, and this time we're in Pafos on a bank holiday Monday. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/11/23/t...
The Architect And The Cigarette (Pafos)
June 9th-12th 2025 [previously: June 3rd-7th, 7th-9th] Kataklismos? Painintheanus, more like. As discussed earlier in Ayia Napa, we’ve just passed through the festival of the Whitsun weekend,…
spank-the-monkey.co.uk
November 23, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Part three of the report on our summer trip to Cyprus, and this time we're in Pafos on a bank holiday Monday. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/11/23/t...
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
Just realised this is referring to a church in North Carolina and not the Welsh singer
November 20, 2025 at 9:00 PM
Just realised this is referring to a church in North Carolina and not the Welsh singer
Bloody hell. It turns out that if you do this song in a normal voice, you could use it in a John Lewis Christmas advert.
Mostly uploaded so Robbie can see it... the one time anyone will see We Like The Moon live!
@rathergood.bsky.social #7SecondsOfLove
@rathergood.bsky.social #7SecondsOfLove
November 17, 2025 at 10:36 AM
Bloody hell. It turns out that if you do this song in a normal voice, you could use it in a John Lewis Christmas advert.
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
November 13, 2025 at 7:56 PM
It's the second part of this year's What We Did On Our Holidays series, and today we're looking at Nicosia. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/11/13/d...
Drama In The Mini Market (Nicosia)
June 7th-9th 2025 [previously: June 3rd-6th] We’ve been sitting at a bus stop in Ayia Napa for over an hour, having had one full bus drive straight past without stopping, when the taxi driver…
spank-the-monkey.co.uk
November 13, 2025 at 6:06 PM
It's the second part of this year's What We Did On Our Holidays series, and today we're looking at Nicosia. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/11/13/d...
If you see this, post an album cover with a motor vehicle on it.
November 8, 2025 at 10:36 PM
If you see this, post an album cover with a motor vehicle on it.
Last June, The BBG and I went to Ayia Napa. Did we really like it? Was it was it wicked? spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/11/06/t...
The Disco Museum (Ayia Napa)
June 3rd-7th 2025 Dig back into the 27 years of lore of this website, and in the early posts you’ll see the odd passing reference to Spank’s Nephews and His Very Small Niece. Well, as y…
spank-the-monkey.co.uk
November 6, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Last June, The BBG and I went to Ayia Napa. Did we really like it? Was it was it wicked? spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/11/06/t...
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
"The day NYC elects a Muslim Mayor will be the day I die."
--Dick Cheney probably
--Dick Cheney probably
November 5, 2025 at 3:34 AM
"The day NYC elects a Muslim Mayor will be the day I die."
--Dick Cheney probably
--Dick Cheney probably
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
Woke up today to the news
November 4, 2025 at 1:53 PM
Woke up today to the news
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
Oh wow did you hear about the mysterious fire next week
November 4, 2025 at 3:30 PM
Oh wow did you hear about the mysterious fire next week
Bought at the age of 7 or so from the bargain singles bin at my local APT supermarket. Obviously lured in by the Disney IP-infringing label design. Didn't appreciate till decades later that I'd picked up a nifty ska novelty record. youtu.be/xoDGQlbv7F0
November 3, 2025 at 1:30 PM
Bought at the age of 7 or so from the bargain singles bin at my local APT supermarket. Obviously lured in by the Disney IP-infringing label design. Didn't appreciate till decades later that I'd picked up a nifty ska novelty record. youtu.be/xoDGQlbv7F0
A booze-heavy first of the month post, but also including some late Halloween spookiness and a batch of ten tunes to listen to. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/11/01/s...
Simian Substitute Site for November 2025: Wine Monkey
MONTH END PROCESSING FOR OCTOBER 2025 Food and Drink: Despite The Belated Birthday Girl and I being the custodians of the Bermondsey Beer Mile website, we don’t consider its E17 equivalent an…
spank-the-monkey.co.uk
November 1, 2025 at 11:02 AM
A booze-heavy first of the month post, but also including some late Halloween spookiness and a batch of ten tunes to listen to. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/11/01/s...
I've pulled together all of last weekend's #Collabfest coverage into a single post, if you fancy reading reviews of 34 different beers. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/10/30/c...
Collabfest 2025
The last time we talked here about Collabfest – BrewDog’s one-weekend-only bar-based beer festival, held in collaboration with brewers across the world – was in 2023. At that poin…
spank-the-monkey.co.uk
October 30, 2025 at 6:48 PM
I've pulled together all of last weekend's #Collabfest coverage into a single post, if you fancy reading reviews of 34 different beers. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/10/30/c...
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
OK lads, the new @lankumdublin.bsky.social is about to drop and I can not prepare you adequately for Lankum doing techno, you have been warned:
youtu.be/aLLnF4vxaeY?...
youtu.be/aLLnF4vxaeY?...
Lankum - Ghost Town (Official Video)
YouTube video by LankumDublin
youtu.be
October 30, 2025 at 11:21 AM
OK lads, the new @lankumdublin.bsky.social is about to drop and I can not prepare you adequately for Lankum doing techno, you have been warned:
youtu.be/aLLnF4vxaeY?...
youtu.be/aLLnF4vxaeY?...
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
Sadako crawling out of your tv, turning motion smoothing off, then crawling back in
October 26, 2025 at 1:13 PM
Sadako crawling out of your tv, turning motion smoothing off, then crawling back in
Final day of #Collabfest liveblogging on Untappd, everything still to play for. untappd.com/user/spanktm
Spank TheMonkey on Untappd
Spank TheMonkey Check-in Activity on Untappd with beer ratings, venues and more.
untappd.com
October 26, 2025 at 12:38 PM
Final day of #Collabfest liveblogging on Untappd, everything still to play for. untappd.com/user/spanktm
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
There are no Garth Marenghi quotes that you couldn't believably attribute to Michael Haneke.
October 25, 2025 at 10:55 AM
There are no Garth Marenghi quotes that you couldn't believably attribute to Michael Haneke.
Day 3 of liveblogging #Collabfest on Untappd, which is where the bar crawl starts in earnest. Watch my writing skills deteriorate in real time! untappd.com/user/spanktm
Spank TheMonkey on Untappd
Spank TheMonkey Check-in Activity on Untappd with beer ratings, venues and more.
untappd.com
October 25, 2025 at 11:42 AM
Day 3 of liveblogging #Collabfest on Untappd, which is where the bar crawl starts in earnest. Watch my writing skills deteriorate in real time! untappd.com/user/spanktm
Continuing to liveblog #Collabfest on Untappd, though the real work will start tomorrow. untappd.com/user/spanktm
Spank TheMonkey on Untappd
Spank TheMonkey Check-in Activity on Untappd with beer ratings, venues and more.
untappd.com
October 24, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Continuing to liveblog #Collabfest on Untappd, though the real work will start tomorrow. untappd.com/user/spanktm
Liveblogging #Collabfest 2025 on Untappd if anyone's interested in that sort of thing. untp.beer/a7abf34a6e
Spank is drinking a Local Heroes by Fierce Beer
Cranking this thing up again for Collabfest 2025. Comments themselves will be a collab between myself and The Belated Birthday Girl
Beer #1 - nice Westie DIPA to get us started. Decently hoppy with ...
untp.beer
October 23, 2025 at 7:41 PM
Liveblogging #Collabfest 2025 on Untappd if anyone's interested in that sort of thing. untp.beer/a7abf34a6e
Reposted by Spank The Monkey
Louvre Thieves Given Immunity After Confirming Jewels Stolen For Purpose Of Training AI Software https://waterfordwhispersnews.com/2025/10/20/louvre-thieves-given-immunity-after-confirming-jewels-stolen-for-purpose-of-training-ai-software/
Louvre Thieves Given Immunity After Confirming Jewels Stolen For Purpose Of Training AI Software
FRENCH POLICE have immediately ended all efforts to recover priceless Napoleon-era jewellery from the Louvre taken in a daring heist after it emerged the jewels were merely stolen for the purposes of training AI software.
When …
waterfordwhispersnews.com
October 20, 2025 at 11:01 AM
Louvre Thieves Given Immunity After Confirming Jewels Stolen For Purpose Of Training AI Software https://waterfordwhispersnews.com/2025/10/20/louvre-thieves-given-immunity-after-confirming-jewels-stolen-for-purpose-of-training-ai-software/
Last day of #LFF 2025, reviewing Die My Love, Sholay. Final thoughts to follow. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/10/20/s...
Spank’s LFF Diary, Sunday 19/10/2025
Reviewed today: Die My Love, Sholay.
spank-the-monkey.co.uk
October 20, 2025 at 11:16 AM
Last day of #LFF 2025, reviewing Die My Love, Sholay. Final thoughts to follow. spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/10/20/s...
Penultimate day of #LFF 2025, reviewing Broken English, Nouvelle Vague, Still Nouvelle, Straight Circle spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/10/19/s...
Spank’s LFF Diary, Saturday 18/10/2025
Reviewed today: Broken English, Nouvelle Vague, Still Nouvelle, Straight Circle.
spank-the-monkey.co.uk
October 19, 2025 at 9:33 AM
Penultimate day of #LFF 2025, reviewing Broken English, Nouvelle Vague, Still Nouvelle, Straight Circle spank-the-monkey.co.uk/2025/10/19/s...