Wilde Thingy
@wildethingy.bsky.social
Pinned
Wilde Thingy
@wildethingy.bsky.social
· Nov 30
Not going is the new leaving early.
Apophenia is: “the human tendency to perceive a connection or meaningful pattern between unrelated or random things.”
Once you know about it, you see it everywhere.
Once you know about it, you see it everywhere.
February 5, 2026 at 8:37 PM
Apophenia is: “the human tendency to perceive a connection or meaningful pattern between unrelated or random things.”
Once you know about it, you see it everywhere.
Once you know about it, you see it everywhere.
[stuck in a lift]
Me: Oh God!
Mine artist *mimes being stuck in a smaller lift*
Me: OH GOD!
Me: Oh God!
Mine artist *mimes being stuck in a smaller lift*
Me: OH GOD!
February 4, 2026 at 9:14 AM
[stuck in a lift]
Me: Oh God!
Mine artist *mimes being stuck in a smaller lift*
Me: OH GOD!
Me: Oh God!
Mine artist *mimes being stuck in a smaller lift*
Me: OH GOD!
Me: I like what you've done with your eyebrows.
Her: That's not my eyebrows. That's my chihuahua.
Her: That's not my eyebrows. That's my chihuahua.
February 3, 2026 at 7:48 PM
Me: I like what you've done with your eyebrows.
Her: That's not my eyebrows. That's my chihuahua.
Her: That's not my eyebrows. That's my chihuahua.
Classic Starmer: here's a thing I think should happen but I, as prime minister, am not going to do anything about it.
No 10 says Starmer wants Mandelson permanently removed from Lords - but won't commit to legislation taking away his peerage - www.theguardian.com/politics/liv...
February 2, 2026 at 1:06 PM
Classic Starmer: here's a thing I think should happen but I, as prime minister, am not going to do anything about it.
Reposted by Wilde Thingy
I'd been using my new hand-mirror for over 6 months before I realized it was actually a framed stock photo of a much less handsome man.
February 2, 2026 at 12:45 PM
I'd been using my new hand-mirror for over 6 months before I realized it was actually a framed stock photo of a much less handsome man.
They say ignorance kills.
How I wish that was true.
How I wish that was true.
February 1, 2026 at 7:52 PM
They say ignorance kills.
How I wish that was true.
How I wish that was true.
Reposted by Wilde Thingy
interviewer: is there anything more you could tell us about yourself?
cookie monster: me want cooki-
interviewer: besides that
cookie monster: me want cooki-
interviewer: besides that
January 3, 2026 at 4:22 AM
interviewer: is there anything more you could tell us about yourself?
cookie monster: me want cooki-
interviewer: besides that
cookie monster: me want cooki-
interviewer: besides that
Reposted by Wilde Thingy
i bet the first surgeon was probably like “eww”
January 7, 2026 at 3:50 AM
i bet the first surgeon was probably like “eww”
Reposted by Wilde Thingy
Fuck “the summer you turned pretty”—tell me about the season you went absolutely batshit weirdo.
January 15, 2026 at 3:08 AM
Fuck “the summer you turned pretty”—tell me about the season you went absolutely batshit weirdo.
Thank god today is 1st February, bringing to an end my grim month of alcohol free Tuesdays.
February 1, 2026 at 4:11 PM
Thank god today is 1st February, bringing to an end my grim month of alcohol free Tuesdays.
*spends 20 years learning origami.
*folds the perfect paper girlfriend.
*gets serious paper cuts.
*dies of a broken heart.
*folds the perfect paper girlfriend.
*gets serious paper cuts.
*dies of a broken heart.
February 1, 2026 at 9:44 AM
*spends 20 years learning origami.
*folds the perfect paper girlfriend.
*gets serious paper cuts.
*dies of a broken heart.
*folds the perfect paper girlfriend.
*gets serious paper cuts.
*dies of a broken heart.
Me: Why does this cheese taste like soap?
Wife: Probably for the same reason you smell like cheese.
Wife: Probably for the same reason you smell like cheese.
January 28, 2026 at 5:38 PM
Me: Why does this cheese taste like soap?
Wife: Probably for the same reason you smell like cheese.
Wife: Probably for the same reason you smell like cheese.
Reposted by Wilde Thingy
You had sex with a clown?
Well that's just fucking funny.
Well that's just fucking funny.
August 4, 2025 at 6:51 PM
You had sex with a clown?
Well that's just fucking funny.
Well that's just fucking funny.
Reposted by Wilde Thingy
was privileged enough to go to an advanced screening, and don't believe what the critics are saying - MELANIA is a triumph. Yes the dance numbers lag a bit, and the Trump birthday sex scene is a smidge long, but the bit in the airlock where the Melania bursts out of Zachary Levi's stomach? Inspired.
January 21, 2026 at 1:33 PM
was privileged enough to go to an advanced screening, and don't believe what the critics are saying - MELANIA is a triumph. Yes the dance numbers lag a bit, and the Trump birthday sex scene is a smidge long, but the bit in the airlock where the Melania bursts out of Zachary Levi's stomach? Inspired.
You are my machine.
I am your ghost.
- Cartesian dualist sext
I am your ghost.
- Cartesian dualist sext
January 25, 2026 at 9:14 PM
You are my machine.
I am your ghost.
- Cartesian dualist sext
I am your ghost.
- Cartesian dualist sext
The most important force in human history is stupidity and if you need proof... *gestures at everything*
January 25, 2026 at 7:49 PM
The most important force in human history is stupidity and if you need proof... *gestures at everything*
Enjoy the best of both worlds with a dogmatic cat.
Or a catatonic dog.
Or a catatonic dog.
January 18, 2026 at 7:34 PM
Enjoy the best of both worlds with a dogmatic cat.
Or a catatonic dog.
Or a catatonic dog.
How much chocolate is too much chocolate before it is technically no longer a salad?
January 17, 2026 at 8:09 AM
How much chocolate is too much chocolate before it is technically no longer a salad?
Reposted by Wilde Thingy
“did you see that Brianna Wu was flirting with Elisabeth Holmes by talking about cutting off Brian Johnson’s Johns-“
You bolt awake. You are not online. You are General Hannibal. It is 218 BC. You have seen the future and it cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.
You bolt awake. You are not online. You are General Hannibal. It is 218 BC. You have seen the future and it cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.
January 12, 2026 at 3:48 PM
“did you see that Brianna Wu was flirting with Elisabeth Holmes by talking about cutting off Brian Johnson’s Johns-“
You bolt awake. You are not online. You are General Hannibal. It is 218 BC. You have seen the future and it cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.
You bolt awake. You are not online. You are General Hannibal. It is 218 BC. You have seen the future and it cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.
Sometimes I worry I'm doing life all wrong if I ever want to be rich and successful
❤️🔥Tory sources confirm that Nadhim Zahawi made approaches to senior members of Kemi Badenoch's team about getting a peerage just weeks before defecting to Reform UK - but was turned down.
January 12, 2026 at 4:46 PM
Sometimes I worry I'm doing life all wrong if I ever want to be rich and successful
Stop trying to make Reform's latest recruit look bad with all these accurate stories from his past!
our profile of Nadhim Zahawi from 2023, including
- his friendship with author-turned-jailbird Jeffrey Archer
- his HMRC settlement of nearly £5mn, made up of £3.7mn of unpaid taxes, a £1.1mn fine and some interest
- his work as an oil industry fixer *while* a Tory MP
www.ft.com/content/9a49...
- his friendship with author-turned-jailbird Jeffrey Archer
- his HMRC settlement of nearly £5mn, made up of £3.7mn of unpaid taxes, a £1.1mn fine and some interest
- his work as an oil industry fixer *while* a Tory MP
www.ft.com/content/9a49...
From Iraqi oilfields to Tory HQ: how Nadhim Zahawi mixed business and politics
The UK Conservative party chair’s tax travails are the latest chapter in a career that has brought him great wealth
www.ft.com
January 12, 2026 at 1:33 PM
Stop trying to make Reform's latest recruit look bad with all these accurate stories from his past!
Her: I don't believe in coincidences.
Me: OMG! Me neither!
Me: OMG! Me neither!
January 11, 2026 at 8:45 PM
Her: I don't believe in coincidences.
Me: OMG! Me neither!
Me: OMG! Me neither!
Wave your hands in the air like you just don't understand the concept of having genuine empathy for anyone else.
December 31, 2025 at 12:36 PM
Wave your hands in the air like you just don't understand the concept of having genuine empathy for anyone else.
Reposted by Wilde Thingy
My look today was isolated wind gust
December 31, 2025 at 7:39 AM
My look today was isolated wind gust
Today's to-do list:
☑️ Do nothing
☑️ Do nothing
December 29, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Today's to-do list:
☑️ Do nothing
☑️ Do nothing