Bevix
@bevix.bsky.social
Reposted by Bevix
how can we exist in a world ran by people who don’t think this shit is a problem
January 2, 2026 at 2:08 AM
how can we exist in a world ran by people who don’t think this shit is a problem
Reposted by Bevix
squirrel: *points gun*
me: what do you want me to do?
squirrel: *gestures at sign*
me: alright, i get it *opens book drop*
squirrel: *makes hurry-up motion*
me: NOT A SQUIRREL!
squirrel: *disappears into book drop*
me: *whispers* forgive me, keith
me: what do you want me to do?
squirrel: *gestures at sign*
me: alright, i get it *opens book drop*
squirrel: *makes hurry-up motion*
me: NOT A SQUIRREL!
squirrel: *disappears into book drop*
me: *whispers* forgive me, keith
November 19, 2025 at 1:41 PM
squirrel: *points gun*
me: what do you want me to do?
squirrel: *gestures at sign*
me: alright, i get it *opens book drop*
squirrel: *makes hurry-up motion*
me: NOT A SQUIRREL!
squirrel: *disappears into book drop*
me: *whispers* forgive me, keith
me: what do you want me to do?
squirrel: *gestures at sign*
me: alright, i get it *opens book drop*
squirrel: *makes hurry-up motion*
me: NOT A SQUIRREL!
squirrel: *disappears into book drop*
me: *whispers* forgive me, keith
Reposted by Bevix
Cosigned. As @pattonoswalt.bsky.social just said: Wood chipper, feet first.
I see the “technically it’s ephebophelia” crowd is out today, so just a reminder that A) this is NOT a case where technically correct is the best kind of correct and B) the minute you say this, the gods dump you in the “irredeemable creeper” basket and wash their hands thoroughly after touching you.
November 13, 2025 at 7:38 PM
Cosigned. As @pattonoswalt.bsky.social just said: Wood chipper, feet first.
Reposted by Bevix
Reposted by Bevix
I lost my job, my kids have measles, and it is now clear to me that the President of the United States is a pedophile. But at least I know that the Cracker Barrel logo won't be changed any time soon.
November 12, 2025 at 5:48 PM
I lost my job, my kids have measles, and it is now clear to me that the President of the United States is a pedophile. But at least I know that the Cracker Barrel logo won't be changed any time soon.
Reposted by Bevix
If sandwich shops don’t start offering a sandwich named “the acquittal” then what are we even doing
November 6, 2025 at 9:27 PM
If sandwich shops don’t start offering a sandwich named “the acquittal” then what are we even doing
These are not serious people
EXCLUSIVE: One Saturday afternoon in October, my phone lit up with a notification.
I glanced down at the message.
“Anna, Lindsey Halligan here,” it began.
So began my text exchange with the woman who is prosecuting the president's perceived political enemies.
www.lawfaremedia.org/article/anna...
I glanced down at the message.
“Anna, Lindsey Halligan here,” it began.
So began my text exchange with the woman who is prosecuting the president's perceived political enemies.
www.lawfaremedia.org/article/anna...
October 21, 2025 at 11:31 PM
These are not serious people
Reposted by Bevix
Congress Sends Unemployed Americans 40 Million Boxes Of Saltwater Taffy From Vacation https://theonion.com/congress-sends-unemployed-americans-40-million-boxes-of-1844729789/
October 21, 2025 at 6:00 PM
Congress Sends Unemployed Americans 40 Million Boxes Of Saltwater Taffy From Vacation https://theonion.com/congress-sends-unemployed-americans-40-million-boxes-of-1844729789/
Reposted by Bevix
Let’s check in on the warzone in Portland.
October 8, 2025 at 8:33 PM
Let’s check in on the warzone in Portland.
Reposted by Bevix
The effort by the Pentagon to crack down on reporters should scare every American. The civilian leadership obviously wants stenographers covering the U.S. military - and not reporters.
October 8, 2025 at 5:21 PM
The effort by the Pentagon to crack down on reporters should scare every American. The civilian leadership obviously wants stenographers covering the U.S. military - and not reporters.
Reposted by Bevix
ICE attempted
and failed to disappear a food delivery guy.
It needed to be scored.
and failed to disappear a food delivery guy.
It needed to be scored.
September 29, 2025 at 3:10 AM
ICE attempted
and failed to disappear a food delivery guy.
It needed to be scored.
and failed to disappear a food delivery guy.
It needed to be scored.
Reposted by Bevix
They’re only going after Tylenol because the president of the United States can’t say acetaminophen. 🤦♂️
September 22, 2025 at 10:16 PM
They’re only going after Tylenol because the president of the United States can’t say acetaminophen. 🤦♂️
Reposted by Bevix
Reposted by Bevix
RFK Jr. Recommends Eating Good Cancer To Kill The Bad Cancer theonion.com/rfk-jr-...
August 8, 2025 at 4:01 PM
RFK Jr. Recommends Eating Good Cancer To Kill The Bad Cancer theonion.com/rfk-jr-...
Reposted by Bevix
Reposted by Bevix
Reposted by Bevix
It’s so transparent and desperate
July 20, 2025 at 2:32 AM
It’s so transparent and desperate
Reposted by Bevix
literal antichrist
July 16, 2025 at 8:57 PM
literal antichrist
Reposted by Bevix
MAGA Voter Drills Hole Into Skull To Relieve Sudden Doubts About Trump
July 15, 2025 at 8:00 PM
MAGA Voter Drills Hole Into Skull To Relieve Sudden Doubts About Trump
A little too on the nose...😆
Dad Spends Retirement Untangling Big Mess Of Wires
theonion.com/dad-spe...
theonion.com/dad-spe...
July 10, 2025 at 9:51 PM
A little too on the nose...😆
Reposted by Bevix
By 2030, 1 in 4 women in developed countries will remain childfree.
Up to 45% will be single by choice.
Society will frame this as a crisis.
Governments will panic over birth rates.
This is about choice though…
It's about women walking away from the roles that kept men comfortable and powerful.
Up to 45% will be single by choice.
Society will frame this as a crisis.
Governments will panic over birth rates.
This is about choice though…
It's about women walking away from the roles that kept men comfortable and powerful.
July 10, 2025 at 2:22 AM
By 2030, 1 in 4 women in developed countries will remain childfree.
Up to 45% will be single by choice.
Society will frame this as a crisis.
Governments will panic over birth rates.
This is about choice though…
It's about women walking away from the roles that kept men comfortable and powerful.
Up to 45% will be single by choice.
Society will frame this as a crisis.
Governments will panic over birth rates.
This is about choice though…
It's about women walking away from the roles that kept men comfortable and powerful.
Reposted by Bevix
“No collusion”
“I won the election”
“She wasn’t my type”
“I never slept with her”
“It was a perfect phone call”
“We didn’t commit any fraud”
“I never paid her any hush money”
“There are no classified records here”
“There is no Epstein client list”
“I won the election”
“She wasn’t my type”
“I never slept with her”
“It was a perfect phone call”
“We didn’t commit any fraud”
“I never paid her any hush money”
“There are no classified records here”
“There is no Epstein client list”
July 8, 2025 at 12:04 AM
“No collusion”
“I won the election”
“She wasn’t my type”
“I never slept with her”
“It was a perfect phone call”
“We didn’t commit any fraud”
“I never paid her any hush money”
“There are no classified records here”
“There is no Epstein client list”
“I won the election”
“She wasn’t my type”
“I never slept with her”
“It was a perfect phone call”
“We didn’t commit any fraud”
“I never paid her any hush money”
“There are no classified records here”
“There is no Epstein client list”