Craig Deeley
@craiguito.bsky.social
4.6K followers 1.2K following 820 posts
I do stand-up and post silly things. I also did a podcast https://www.podbean.com/pi/pbblog-zf537-286755
Posts Media Videos Starter Packs
craiguito.bsky.social
In olden times people used 'hath' and 'doth' for 'has' and 'does' because they lost their teeth much earlier.
Reposted by Craig Deeley
wheeltod.bsky.social
“Hey. I’m not judging”
— lazy judge
craiguito.bsky.social
The most disappointing thing for me when I visited the Louvre was that none of its doors had slats
craiguito.bsky.social
I remember when the main Nazis we had to worry about were grammar ones
Reposted by Craig Deeley
kattsdogma.bsky.social
you can’t sue car companies. they have auto-immunity .
Reposted by Craig Deeley
chriso1.bsky.social
I wonder if U.K. Gold could possibly do some sort of advert for that Fawlty Towers stage play?

AND THEN SHOW IT IN EVERY COMMERCIAL BREAK.
craiguito.bsky.social
Still no response from my Microsoft Error Report 11 years ago
craiguito.bsky.social
They should have a special rapture for people like me who missed the rapture because they were on the toilet. They could call it the crapture.
Reposted by Craig Deeley
theliamnissan.bsky.social
BREAKING NEWS: TYLENOL RESEARCHERS FIND DISTURBING LINK BETWEEN DONALD TRUMP AND JEFFREY EPSTEIN
Reposted by Craig Deeley
nick-pettigrew.bsky.social
When you're grieving Charlie Kirk at 7 but you've got a Royal Rumble cage match with John Cena at 8.
adamjschwarz.bsky.social
Charlie Kirk's grieving widow had just left the stage moments before the fireworks for Trump kicked off.

Just so wildly and blatantly inappropriate for a memorial service for someone else.

Fucking nuts.
craiguito.bsky.social
I'm just a boy, standing in front of an open fridge, knowing this is not what I came in here for
Reposted by Craig Deeley
davelee.me
Dutch late night TV has its take
craiguito.bsky.social
In my spare time I enjoy going to the theatre, listening to music, and cooking Indian food, although everyone watching the play never seems very impressed
craiguito.bsky.social
“I don’t know the Malverns or Brecon Beacons but they sound funny”
“Yes, they’re hill areas”
Reposted by Craig Deeley
dankackroyd.bsky.social
Calling Jeffrey Epstein ‘the paedophile financier’ makes him sound like something from Patisserie Valerie
craiguito.bsky.social
Northern Ireland's favourite game show is Countydown
craiguito.bsky.social
I put some fridge magnets on my fridge door and now it's covered in fridges
Reposted by Craig Deeley
glennyrodge.bsky.social
Daddy bear: my porridge is too hot.
Mummy bear: my porridge is too cold.
Baby bear: aren't we supposed to eat fish?
craiguito.bsky.social
All the bad stuff that’s going on is punishment for not copying and pasting your Facebook friend’s status to “see who actually reads it”
craiguito.bsky.social
When I drape some toilet paper over the bath to help the spider climb out
Reposted by Craig Deeley
ofalafel.bsky.social
You join us live from Danny Dyer’s birthday drinks.