Haunted Hamburger
@hauntedhamburger.bsky.social
I like to sit on my porch
I thought I had the Sunday Sads for about 20 minutes until I realized it’s Saturday and my mood lifted instantly.
December 28, 2025 at 4:35 AM
I thought I had the Sunday Sads for about 20 minutes until I realized it’s Saturday and my mood lifted instantly.
I miss old school Twitter because everyone knew I loved pickle flavored anything
December 28, 2025 at 3:54 AM
I miss old school Twitter because everyone knew I loved pickle flavored anything
If I win the lottery, the first thing I’m doing is renting a cottage in Scotland for the summer and staring at everything.
December 28, 2025 at 3:53 AM
If I win the lottery, the first thing I’m doing is renting a cottage in Scotland for the summer and staring at everything.
wtf? I’ve had hypothyroid for 30 years and now I had hyperthyroid? I just want a full nights sleep for the love of Pete.
December 28, 2025 at 3:49 AM
wtf? I’ve had hypothyroid for 30 years and now I had hyperthyroid? I just want a full nights sleep for the love of Pete.
Merry Christmas to all the parents waiting for their over excited children to go the fuck to sleep so they can put the presents under the tree and go to sleep themselves
December 25, 2025 at 6:05 AM
Merry Christmas to all the parents waiting for their over excited children to go the fuck to sleep so they can put the presents under the tree and go to sleep themselves
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
All I want is a cottage in the Scottish Highlands, a raging snowstorm, an Agatha Christie novel, a crackling fire, a kettle on the stove, a purring cat, and a basket of emotional support scones.
December 22, 2025 at 6:43 PM
All I want is a cottage in the Scottish Highlands, a raging snowstorm, an Agatha Christie novel, a crackling fire, a kettle on the stove, a purring cat, and a basket of emotional support scones.
Holiday Inn has a crazy plot line. This is soap opera level romance drama. Now I get why they made White Christmas.
December 25, 2025 at 5:02 AM
Holiday Inn has a crazy plot line. This is soap opera level romance drama. Now I get why they made White Christmas.
Can you imagine if ToysRUs had a 24 hour pop up right now? They’d be killing it. If they offered assembly? Wow
December 25, 2025 at 4:58 AM
Can you imagine if ToysRUs had a 24 hour pop up right now? They’d be killing it. If they offered assembly? Wow
Since I’m stuck in the living room, who is hotter? Luther or Alice? Idris Elba is a good looking man, but as Luther, he’s pretty toxic. Alice is definitely dangerous, but she is awfully handy at getting rid of problems and always interesting
December 25, 2025 at 4:43 AM
Since I’m stuck in the living room, who is hotter? Luther or Alice? Idris Elba is a good looking man, but as Luther, he’s pretty toxic. Alice is definitely dangerous, but she is awfully handy at getting rid of problems and always interesting
Listen: if you to create all the Holiday magic and your partner can’t be bothered to get you one gift to open or put anything in your stocking, LEAVE THEM. My ex never got me Xmas gifts. My now husband has shut me out of a room so he can wrap multiple gifts to me and my son.
December 25, 2025 at 4:36 AM
Listen: if you to create all the Holiday magic and your partner can’t be bothered to get you one gift to open or put anything in your stocking, LEAVE THEM. My ex never got me Xmas gifts. My now husband has shut me out of a room so he can wrap multiple gifts to me and my son.
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
Extremely funny to call the pope “holier-than-thou”
December 25, 2025 at 4:05 AM
Extremely funny to call the pope “holier-than-thou”
I will never be good at wrapping presents and I am totally fine with that. If you can’t see the packaging underneath, good enough.
December 25, 2025 at 4:21 AM
I will never be good at wrapping presents and I am totally fine with that. If you can’t see the packaging underneath, good enough.
I was never attracted to Bruce Willis before, but I’m watching Die Hard again and this age me thinks this man is fine af.
December 24, 2025 at 6:38 PM
I was never attracted to Bruce Willis before, but I’m watching Die Hard again and this age me thinks this man is fine af.
Cheese toast is so underrated.
December 24, 2025 at 4:31 PM
Cheese toast is so underrated.
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
I’m the personality hire of my family
December 24, 2025 at 4:00 PM
I’m the personality hire of my family
My grown son still believes in Santa and it so lovely. I know people think my life is hard because my son has IDD, ASD, and Epilepsy and sure, there are issues we face and our lives look different, but do you see how magical our life is?
December 24, 2025 at 3:55 PM
My grown son still believes in Santa and it so lovely. I know people think my life is hard because my son has IDD, ASD, and Epilepsy and sure, there are issues we face and our lives look different, but do you see how magical our life is?
The worst trait I inherited from my mom is being put out when everyone else is still asleep and I’ve been up for hours. The difference is, I’m not banging a vacuum against people’s bedroom doors, I’m just sitting quietly. We are breaking the cycles, even when irritable.
December 24, 2025 at 3:49 PM
The worst trait I inherited from my mom is being put out when everyone else is still asleep and I’ve been up for hours. The difference is, I’m not banging a vacuum against people’s bedroom doors, I’m just sitting quietly. We are breaking the cycles, even when irritable.
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
I am about as "give every student the benefit of the doubt" as you can be, but eff this student. Willfully setting up a TA and professor; nakedly lying to destroy others' careers; shamelessly cashing in with the right-wing grievance complex. What a miserable person. I hope she never graduates.
Worth noting that the student admits that she just threw the thing together in 30 minutes without reading the paper she was supposed to be responding to.
December 23, 2025 at 8:21 PM
I am about as "give every student the benefit of the doubt" as you can be, but eff this student. Willfully setting up a TA and professor; nakedly lying to destroy others' careers; shamelessly cashing in with the right-wing grievance complex. What a miserable person. I hope she never graduates.
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
I need an IV drip of terrible influencers being boxed back into the Stone Age, please and thank you
🚨 Andrew Tate has been BATTERED and comprehensively beaten by a novice boxer, Chase DeMoor
December 21, 2025 at 12:27 AM
I need an IV drip of terrible influencers being boxed back into the Stone Age, please and thank you
I’m upset we don’t have any snack food in the house. I know I am the purchaser of groceries, but still…
December 20, 2025 at 7:24 AM
I’m upset we don’t have any snack food in the house. I know I am the purchaser of groceries, but still…
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
I would like a second grilled cheese
I would like a grilled cheese
December 20, 2025 at 6:01 AM
I would like a second grilled cheese
I just had a 2+ hour phone conversation with my bestie and laughed my ass off so many times.
December 20, 2025 at 7:16 AM
I just had a 2+ hour phone conversation with my bestie and laughed my ass off so many times.
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
I may have shouted “Roger Ackroyd!” at the screen like he owed me money, lol
December 16, 2025 at 11:44 PM
I may have shouted “Roger Ackroyd!” at the screen like he owed me money, lol
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
posting is rly embarrassing
December 16, 2025 at 11:21 PM
posting is rly embarrassing
Reposted by Haunted Hamburger
Blanc’s Foghorn Leghorn accent is also not found in nature, but it’s part of how the story is constructed, marking him (like Poirot being Belgian) as an outside observer in the cases where he finds himself, someone who Isn’t From Round Here and therefore has an alternate perspective
December 17, 2025 at 2:22 AM
Blanc’s Foghorn Leghorn accent is also not found in nature, but it’s part of how the story is constructed, marking him (like Poirot being Belgian) as an outside observer in the cases where he finds himself, someone who Isn’t From Round Here and therefore has an alternate perspective