Jeremy Hellwig
@jeremyhellwig.bsky.social
I do standup. Member of Fatal Bus Accident. Probably other stuff.
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
Newly Unsealed Batch Of Epstein Estate Photos Contains Rare Holographic Dershowitz
December 12, 2025 at 8:20 PM
Newly Unsealed Batch Of Epstein Estate Photos Contains Rare Holographic Dershowitz
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
The USPS posting a NINE BILLION DOLLAR LOSS!!! sounds terrible. Certainly worse than if you said "USPS costs thirty dollars per person per year" even though that means the same thing and more accurately describes a government service
December 5, 2025 at 1:31 PM
The USPS posting a NINE BILLION DOLLAR LOSS!!! sounds terrible. Certainly worse than if you said "USPS costs thirty dollars per person per year" even though that means the same thing and more accurately describes a government service
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
I’ve forgotten this sometimes but being able to discover something you like, curate it, and make time to enjoy it *is* intelligence, connecting with art is intelligence, empathy is intelligence, the way of the dullard is to find nothing meaningful in art except for a way to seem snidely clever
December 4, 2025 at 3:21 AM
I’ve forgotten this sometimes but being able to discover something you like, curate it, and make time to enjoy it *is* intelligence, connecting with art is intelligence, empathy is intelligence, the way of the dullard is to find nothing meaningful in art except for a way to seem snidely clever
I've gotten out of the habit lately, but if I find myself still thinking about someone's joke days after I heard it, I try to remember to reach out and tell them. Great joke! It's so good I can't stop thinking about it. I look forward to hearing it again!
I’ve sometimes fallen into the trap of thinking that complementing a creative person for their work is less sophisticated or desired than discussion or debate about it but very often the best thing you can say to them is hell yeah and that doesn’t make you dumb it just makes you nice
December 4, 2025 at 7:13 AM
I've gotten out of the habit lately, but if I find myself still thinking about someone's joke days after I heard it, I try to remember to reach out and tell them. Great joke! It's so good I can't stop thinking about it. I look forward to hearing it again!
A more minor issue, sure, but it's wild to me that when you hover over the show, the preview isn't a trailer or something from the first episode, but rather the entirety of the climactic scene of the first season finale.
HBOMax has started showing a 'remastered' 4K Mad Men and they’ve messed things up so during Roger’s oyster vomit scene you can now see the crew men with the vomit hose on the right
December 2, 2025 at 4:02 PM
A more minor issue, sure, but it's wild to me that when you hover over the show, the preview isn't a trailer or something from the first episode, but rather the entirety of the climactic scene of the first season finale.
@demilardner.bsky.social just listened to the latest BST, and as someone from St Louis, my wife (who isn't on this app) needs you to know that, although the song pronounces it "Saint Louie," literally nobody here pronounces it like that.
November 30, 2025 at 6:21 AM
@demilardner.bsky.social just listened to the latest BST, and as someone from St Louis, my wife (who isn't on this app) needs you to know that, although the song pronounces it "Saint Louie," literally nobody here pronounces it like that.
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
The "Larry Summers complained to Jeffrey Epstein that MeToo went too far" and "Olivia Nuzzi committed crimes on behalf of the fascist she masturbated with while reporting on him" are the same story: American elites have no ideology other than "I should be untouchable." Society is run by empty husks
November 28, 2025 at 1:50 PM
The "Larry Summers complained to Jeffrey Epstein that MeToo went too far" and "Olivia Nuzzi committed crimes on behalf of the fascist she masturbated with while reporting on him" are the same story: American elites have no ideology other than "I should be untouchable." Society is run by empty husks
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
they are removing a big australian beach christmas artwork from redfern station (a huge train station) because it's ai garbage. kangaroos have koala heads and some animals have missing limbs and one of them is WEARING A BRA
November 28, 2025 at 4:43 AM
they are removing a big australian beach christmas artwork from redfern station (a huge train station) because it's ai garbage. kangaroos have koala heads and some animals have missing limbs and one of them is WEARING A BRA
I feel like if most of your mayoral campaign was complaining about the incumbent messing up snow clearing during a huge storm, you don't get to miss a month of street cleaning during fall. Walking my neighborhood, everyone raked leaves into the street and they're still there.
November 25, 2025 at 8:39 PM
I feel like if most of your mayoral campaign was complaining about the incumbent messing up snow clearing during a huge storm, you don't get to miss a month of street cleaning during fall. Walking my neighborhood, everyone raked leaves into the street and they're still there.
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
Yes, HID headlights are very bright but the bigger problem is the proliferation of gargantuan vehicles with 5’+ hood heights so that if you’re driving a normal sized car their headlights are at your eye level rather than seat level like they’re supposed to be.
November 25, 2025 at 5:21 AM
Yes, HID headlights are very bright but the bigger problem is the proliferation of gargantuan vehicles with 5’+ hood heights so that if you’re driving a normal sized car their headlights are at your eye level rather than seat level like they’re supposed to be.
I thought this said Michael Clayton. I was like, man I need to rewatch that movie because I don't remember any of this.
Michael Crichton researching dinosaur behavior and genetic engineering versus Michael Crichton researching whether Costa Rica has an air force
November 19, 2025 at 8:21 PM
I thought this said Michael Clayton. I was like, man I need to rewatch that movie because I don't remember any of this.
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
women are always saying “lord grant me the confidence of a mediocre man.” ok well he did. now what. is the world a better place? look at what you’ve wrought.
Olivia Nuzzi's 'American Canto': Read the Exclusive Excerpt
She flamed out and she faded away. 'Vanity Fair'’s West Coast Editor returns to the written word to survey scorched earth.
www.vanityfair.com
November 17, 2025 at 3:46 PM
women are always saying “lord grant me the confidence of a mediocre man.” ok well he did. now what. is the world a better place? look at what you’ve wrought.
Now You See Me: Here We Go Again
November 12, 2025 at 1:17 AM
Now You See Me: Here We Go Again
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
I've noticed the opposing team's fans only cheer when the opponents score on us. To win those fans over, I recommend we score on ourselves repeatedly; that will surely make them so happy they'll start supporting us. And I'm sure all our fans will keep cheering for us—who else is there to cheer for?
October 10, 2025 at 12:19 PM
I've noticed the opposing team's fans only cheer when the opponents score on us. To win those fans over, I recommend we score on ourselves repeatedly; that will surely make them so happy they'll start supporting us. And I'm sure all our fans will keep cheering for us—who else is there to cheer for?
My debut standup album is available for pre-order. It's very good and I think you will enjoy it. Also, my wife has a romance novel coming out later this month, and if you pre-order both of them, we'll mail you one item we found in our house.
November 10, 2025 at 4:29 PM
My debut standup album is available for pre-order. It's very good and I think you will enjoy it. Also, my wife has a romance novel coming out later this month, and if you pre-order both of them, we'll mail you one item we found in our house.
Devin has been working on this book for years, and I know from reading some of his articles and listening to some podcast appearances that this is going to be really good. Pre-order it from your favorite local bookstore.
November 7, 2025 at 2:16 PM
Devin has been working on this book for years, and I know from reading some of his articles and listening to some podcast appearances that this is going to be really good. Pre-order it from your favorite local bookstore.
Next week my album goes on presale, I get to be part of Flyover Comedy Festival, and I get to announce that Fatal Bus Accident got into a really awesome festival next year. It's going to be a great week!
November 6, 2025 at 5:33 PM
Next week my album goes on presale, I get to be part of Flyover Comedy Festival, and I get to announce that Fatal Bus Accident got into a really awesome festival next year. It's going to be a great week!
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
Head in hands wondering how this could happen to me, the popular president who posted a video of myself shitting on everyone 2 weeks ago
November 5, 2025 at 1:57 AM
Head in hands wondering how this could happen to me, the popular president who posted a video of myself shitting on everyone 2 weeks ago
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
on the topic of dick cheney, one thing i’ve always said is that you shouldn’t kill a million people
November 4, 2025 at 12:07 PM
on the topic of dick cheney, one thing i’ve always said is that you shouldn’t kill a million people
Just turned on Monday Night Football, and maybe I'm a traditionalist, but if you're going to cover Phil Collins, you should have to play the drums while singing.
October 28, 2025 at 12:03 AM
Just turned on Monday Night Football, and maybe I'm a traditionalist, but if you're going to cover Phil Collins, you should have to play the drums while singing.
Reposted by Jeremy Hellwig
i know it sucks but it must feel a little fun to be that guy with the backhoe destroying the white house. that’s like the final boss of operating heavy machinery
October 21, 2025 at 9:03 PM
i know it sucks but it must feel a little fun to be that guy with the backhoe destroying the white house. that’s like the final boss of operating heavy machinery
Shoot for the moon, and if you miss, you'll be among the moon.
October 10, 2025 at 1:49 AM
Shoot for the moon, and if you miss, you'll be among the moon.
Reconnected with someone on Facebook a few years after college. Now we've been married 10 years.
Has anything great happened in your life because of social media?
October 10, 2025 at 1:33 AM
Reconnected with someone on Facebook a few years after college. Now we've been married 10 years.