William Howard Taft (Real)
@the-bepis-consumer.bsky.social
I expand to fill the size of whatever container you put me in
Pronouns: He/Him or whatever makes the bit funniest
Pronouns: He/Him or whatever makes the bit funniest
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
invented a secret stealth drone that doesn't make any noise and i put bright red and green blinking lights on it too i hope my boss at the foreign spy agency likes my design for operation fly-above-america-especially-near-airports
December 15, 2024 at 6:53 AM
invented a secret stealth drone that doesn't make any noise and i put bright red and green blinking lights on it too i hope my boss at the foreign spy agency likes my design for operation fly-above-america-especially-near-airports
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
Peruvian giant corn grown in Sheboygan county Wisconsin. Please repost
November 25, 2024 at 6:35 PM
Peruvian giant corn grown in Sheboygan county Wisconsin. Please repost
Welcome to Night Vale season one
"there's drones in the night sky and nobody knows where they came from" who cares not my problem
December 14, 2024 at 2:35 PM
Welcome to Night Vale season one
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
i would never post anything stupid online, my exceedingly intelligent followers would not stand for that kind of nonsense
December 10, 2024 at 6:27 PM
i would never post anything stupid online, my exceedingly intelligent followers would not stand for that kind of nonsense
*guy who named worm gears looking at a screw* yeah that's a fuckin uhhh...
Worm
Worm
December 10, 2024 at 4:54 AM
*guy who named worm gears looking at a screw* yeah that's a fuckin uhhh...
Worm
Worm
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
Instead of resorting to violence, football players should use their words to find out who is best at playing football
December 9, 2024 at 1:07 AM
Instead of resorting to violence, football players should use their words to find out who is best at playing football
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
if i were the NYPD i would try releasing some facts about the shooter that do not make him sound awesome
December 8, 2024 at 1:49 AM
if i were the NYPD i would try releasing some facts about the shooter that do not make him sound awesome
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
[suspect pretending to walk downstairs behind the couch]
new york detective: it’s possible he left new york
new york detective: it’s possible he left new york
December 7, 2024 at 3:07 AM
[suspect pretending to walk downstairs behind the couch]
new york detective: it’s possible he left new york
new york detective: it’s possible he left new york
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
I heard “Have a Holly Jolly Christmas” on the radio when it used to be “Have a Holly Jolly PRONOUN”
December 6, 2024 at 11:07 PM
I heard “Have a Holly Jolly Christmas” on the radio when it used to be “Have a Holly Jolly PRONOUN”
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
Nation Tires Of Deals, Bargains
theonion.com/nation-tires...
theonion.com/nation-tires...
December 6, 2024 at 7:54 PM
Nation Tires Of Deals, Bargains
theonion.com/nation-tires...
theonion.com/nation-tires...
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
the "notch" space on an iphone should be used for a serial port imo
November 29, 2024 at 6:43 AM
the "notch" space on an iphone should be used for a serial port imo
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
how are people still getting shitcoin rugpulled? do you also fall for it when someone says it smells like updog in here?
December 6, 2024 at 9:18 AM
how are people still getting shitcoin rugpulled? do you also fall for it when someone says it smells like updog in here?
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
on “Wonderful Christmastime,” Sir Paul McCartney set out to make a timeless christmas classic and also to figure out what every button on his synthesizer did, and he absolutely succeeded at one of those things
December 5, 2024 at 7:01 PM
on “Wonderful Christmastime,” Sir Paul McCartney set out to make a timeless christmas classic and also to figure out what every button on his synthesizer did, and he absolutely succeeded at one of those things
"Congration You Done It" has irrevocably altered my brain chemistry, I just say it at every opportunity and no one has called me out on my bull shit
December 5, 2024 at 6:42 PM
"Congration You Done It" has irrevocably altered my brain chemistry, I just say it at every opportunity and no one has called me out on my bull shit
If that CEO guy had been as rotund as me, his natural defenses would have been high enough to survive. Ozempic was actually a psyop to make rich people more vulnerable all this time.
December 5, 2024 at 2:09 PM
If that CEO guy had been as rotund as me, his natural defenses would have been high enough to survive. Ozempic was actually a psyop to make rich people more vulnerable all this time.
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
Quality of life has gotten so low people are saying it's on sight to CEOs
December 4, 2024 at 9:57 PM
Quality of life has gotten so low people are saying it's on sight to CEOs
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
“i hate health insurance CEOs” now replace health insurance CEOs with women. not so funny, is it?
December 5, 2024 at 10:36 AM
“i hate health insurance CEOs” now replace health insurance CEOs with women. not so funny, is it?
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
It's not that I'm incurious. It's that I already know everything.
December 4, 2024 at 5:43 PM
It's not that I'm incurious. It's that I already know everything.
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
"You may shoot me dead in the street, but in the Arena of Principled Debate I'll remain undefeated. Ha. Enjoy your delusion."—His Last Words
December 4, 2024 at 5:49 PM
"You may shoot me dead in the street, but in the Arena of Principled Debate I'll remain undefeated. Ha. Enjoy your delusion."—His Last Words
Reposted by William Howard Taft (Real)
they're gatekeeping crack groups on x the everything app
December 4, 2024 at 1:29 AM
they're gatekeeping crack groups on x the everything app
Every couple months there's a new word game that updates daily and people will be like "here's today's slumbus!" and post a picture of a bunch of squares in various pastel colors
December 4, 2024 at 1:40 PM
Every couple months there's a new word game that updates daily and people will be like "here's today's slumbus!" and post a picture of a bunch of squares in various pastel colors