Travis
@travixty.bsky.social
Reposted by Travis
everyday i wake up and fall out of bed and hit my head on the corner of the nightstand. it's stained with blood now, due to my numerous head wounds that have begun to fester. then, i eat breakfast and head to my job at the New York Times
August 12, 2024 at 10:17 PM
everyday i wake up and fall out of bed and hit my head on the corner of the nightstand. it's stained with blood now, due to my numerous head wounds that have begun to fester. then, i eat breakfast and head to my job at the New York Times
Reposted by Travis
Me losing my cool when someone asks me for the millionth time what South Korea’s currency is bsky.app/profile/redd...
January 4, 2025 at 7:02 PM
Me losing my cool when someone asks me for the millionth time what South Korea’s currency is bsky.app/profile/redd...
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my glass coffin company “remains to be seen” is not doing as well as i thought it would.
December 3, 2024 at 1:02 AM
my glass coffin company “remains to be seen” is not doing as well as i thought it would.
Reposted by Travis
Reposted by Travis
you know who should be inducted into the rock and roll hall of fame? Sisyphus
December 23, 2024 at 1:15 AM
you know who should be inducted into the rock and roll hall of fame? Sisyphus
Reposted by Travis
Reposted by Travis
Reposted by Travis
Reposted by Travis
![Trevor Moore @TrevorLess
HR LADY: And it says here under Emergency Contacts you just wrote "FIRE TRUCK"
ME: [visibly excited] Fire truck
8:02 PM • 2017-06-05](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:vzh3zzjcbamllzjadsmfooxq/bafkreicrboyssrn4mhsre3oxusk7ojgb3ek6zmencha5okn4s3cjdmj75a@jpeg)
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![brandAn is good @LeBearGirdle
[Dentist waiting room]
Me: [chanting] teeth, teeth-
Other patients: teeth, TEETH
Secretary: [pounding her clipboard] TEETH, TEETH, TEETH!
5:30 PM • 2017-08-17](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:vzh3zzjcbamllzjadsmfooxq/bafkreifhp2lctjlcjsemartdjp6cnshwcb6le267euf75rca4qfg3y2gda@jpeg)
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What's Breeding Gilbert's Gape
November 8, 2023 at 6:11 AM
What's Breeding Gilbert's Gape
Reposted by Travis
hallmark should make an evil dead movie
December 8, 2024 at 2:21 AM
hallmark should make an evil dead movie
Reposted by Travis
hitting the sad face button on my way out of the airport restroom after finding a guy dead on the toilet
November 28, 2024 at 6:38 PM
hitting the sad face button on my way out of the airport restroom after finding a guy dead on the toilet
Reposted by Travis
the worst part of getting fired from the unemployment office is still having to go in the next day
November 30, 2024 at 12:03 PM
the worst part of getting fired from the unemployment office is still having to go in the next day
Reposted by Travis
The Blu-Ray authoring software I use is called Kite UHD, it's programmed and supported by just two guys in Ukraine, and it's only one of about 3 software programs in the world that can author 4K Blu-Rays. And it's done by 2 guys in a war zone, and they always answer my emails the same day
November 29, 2024 at 8:54 AM
The Blu-Ray authoring software I use is called Kite UHD, it's programmed and supported by just two guys in Ukraine, and it's only one of about 3 software programs in the world that can author 4K Blu-Rays. And it's done by 2 guys in a war zone, and they always answer my emails the same day
Reposted by Travis
wow the parade this year was crazy
November 28, 2024 at 2:01 PM
wow the parade this year was crazy
Reposted by Travis
Doctor: Your baby has a temperature. You must make sure he's cool
Me *puts a baseball cap on him*
Doctor: He is sick!
Me: Thank you!
Me *puts a baseball cap on him*
Doctor: He is sick!
Me: Thank you!
November 27, 2024 at 6:54 PM
Doctor: Your baby has a temperature. You must make sure he's cool
Me *puts a baseball cap on him*
Doctor: He is sick!
Me: Thank you!
Me *puts a baseball cap on him*
Doctor: He is sick!
Me: Thank you!
Reposted by Travis
I was on a menswear forum with Michael Anton for many years. If you plan to work in the Trump White House and have a petty rivalry with him, let me know. I can help you say things around him that will get under his skin. @sebgorka.bsky.social
November 23, 2024 at 5:21 AM
I was on a menswear forum with Michael Anton for many years. If you plan to work in the Trump White House and have a petty rivalry with him, let me know. I can help you say things around him that will get under his skin. @sebgorka.bsky.social
Oh I'm cooking with this one. Check out my keg ice bucket for tomorrow
November 2, 2024 at 12:23 AM
Oh I'm cooking with this one. Check out my keg ice bucket for tomorrow
Reposted by Travis
Halloween is a dead give-away
October 31, 2024 at 12:25 PM
Halloween is a dead give-away
Who's the correct write-in? Cornell West, or someone else?
October 29, 2024 at 12:24 AM
Who's the correct write-in? Cornell West, or someone else?
How did 18 people favorite my pip boy tweet,I have 21 followers total lol
October 28, 2024 at 10:42 PM
How did 18 people favorite my pip boy tweet,I have 21 followers total lol
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Sorry, Verizon, but the only 5G I’m interested in this October is g-g-g-g-ghosts!!!
October 28, 2024 at 5:30 PM
Sorry, Verizon, but the only 5G I’m interested in this October is g-g-g-g-ghosts!!!
@caylen.bsky.social I meant to tell you earlier but you had like 18 replies already, but you look shockingly like burt gummer in that photo
October 28, 2024 at 3:11 AM
@caylen.bsky.social I meant to tell you earlier but you had like 18 replies already, but you look shockingly like burt gummer in that photo