Unemployable Man
@unemployableman.bsky.social
Ok bartender, now available in the USVI!
Should NOT be encouraged.
Should NOT be encouraged.
Reposted by Unemployable Man
People are like “if I won the lottery, I’d keep on working.”
I’d show up at the office one last time, cook an entire trout in the microwave, and leave.
I’d show up at the office one last time, cook an entire trout in the microwave, and leave.
November 23, 2024 at 10:47 PM
People are like “if I won the lottery, I’d keep on working.”
I’d show up at the office one last time, cook an entire trout in the microwave, and leave.
I’d show up at the office one last time, cook an entire trout in the microwave, and leave.
Reposted by Unemployable Man
One of my favorite Jack Handey Deep Thoughts is “If you're a cowboy and you're dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet it would really make you mad if you looked back and the guy was reading a magazine.” I think that’s how conservatives feel about bluesky
November 23, 2024 at 6:48 AM
One of my favorite Jack Handey Deep Thoughts is “If you're a cowboy and you're dragging a guy behind your horse, I bet it would really make you mad if you looked back and the guy was reading a magazine.” I think that’s how conservatives feel about bluesky
Reposted by Unemployable Man
Guy with a buckle on his hat: goodmorrow
Guy who was touching different wires together and accidentally time travelled: ah shit
Guy who was touching different wires together and accidentally time travelled: ah shit
November 23, 2024 at 12:50 PM
Guy with a buckle on his hat: goodmorrow
Guy who was touching different wires together and accidentally time travelled: ah shit
Guy who was touching different wires together and accidentally time travelled: ah shit
Reposted by Unemployable Man
It's unconscionable that grifter aggregation accounts have many multiples of followers compared to the journalists that they steal content from. I never steal content, that's the ̶S̶t̶e̶v̶e̶n̶ ̶M̶o̶n̶a̶c̶e̶l̶l̶i̶ Unemployable Man promise.
It's unconscionable that grifter aggregation accounts have many multiples of followers compared to the journalists that they steal content from. I never steal content, that's the Steven Monacelli promise.
Stop following these shit ass accounts
November 23, 2024 at 11:40 AM
It's unconscionable that grifter aggregation accounts have many multiples of followers compared to the journalists that they steal content from. I never steal content, that's the ̶S̶t̶e̶v̶e̶n̶ ̶M̶o̶n̶a̶c̶e̶l̶l̶i̶ Unemployable Man promise.
No invite codes needed? Just a reminder I’ve been mediocre here for some time.
February 6, 2024 at 2:53 PM
No invite codes needed? Just a reminder I’ve been mediocre here for some time.
Reposted by Unemployable Man
Gonna launch my new AI that’s just old Andrew Dice Clay stand up routines. Gonna make 20 billion dollars in start up money and then get it into the Tallahassee public school system. What’s the Pythagorean theorem? Hickory Dickory Dock mother fucker
December 9, 2023 at 4:45 AM
Gonna launch my new AI that’s just old Andrew Dice Clay stand up routines. Gonna make 20 billion dollars in start up money and then get it into the Tallahassee public school system. What’s the Pythagorean theorem? Hickory Dickory Dock mother fucker
Reposted by Unemployable Man
a note to Washington Post readers: On Dec. 7, we ask you to respect our walkout by not crossing the picket line: For 24 hours, please do not engage with any Post content. That includes our print + online news stories, podcasts, videos, games and recipes.
A letter to our readers
docs.google.com
December 5, 2023 at 4:55 PM
a note to Washington Post readers: On Dec. 7, we ask you to respect our walkout by not crossing the picket line: For 24 hours, please do not engage with any Post content. That includes our print + online news stories, podcasts, videos, games and recipes.
Just started a rewatch of Peacemaker, because it’s important to look at the single dumbest “Skip Intro” button ever.
December 5, 2023 at 2:08 AM
Just started a rewatch of Peacemaker, because it’s important to look at the single dumbest “Skip Intro” button ever.
You know how, in a poorly written teen novel with blonde people on the cover, the protagonist meets their perfect match when they’re at their absolute lowest point?
I think that’s how I just met my new weed guy.
I think that’s how I just met my new weed guy.
December 1, 2023 at 2:39 AM
You know how, in a poorly written teen novel with blonde people on the cover, the protagonist meets their perfect match when they’re at their absolute lowest point?
I think that’s how I just met my new weed guy.
I think that’s how I just met my new weed guy.
Please excuse Brud from work today, as he will be speaking ill of the dead.
November 30, 2023 at 9:20 AM
Please excuse Brud from work today, as he will be speaking ill of the dead.
Welp, I let my nephew run my Guitars account for the weekend, better log in just to see how things went.
November 27, 2023 at 11:49 AM
Welp, I let my nephew run my Guitars account for the weekend, better log in just to see how things went.
Reposted by Unemployable Man
Elon being rescued by the League of Men I Wouldn't Trust To Watch My Drink
November 22, 2023 at 12:08 PM
Elon being rescued by the League of Men I Wouldn't Trust To Watch My Drink
Reposted by Unemployable Man
"Look, I’m obviously happy that our state agreed to protect people’s ability to make choices about their own body, but it just kind of sucks to have to breastfeed during math class."
Ohio 6th-Grader Forced To Give Birth Last Year Slightly Annoyed At Timing Of Abortion Ratification
CLEVELAND—Stressing that she was relieved to know others would now be able to control their own futures, sixth-grader Amanda Zwillet, a local girl forced to give birth last year, told reporters W...
www.theonion.com
November 15, 2023 at 9:37 PM
"Look, I’m obviously happy that our state agreed to protect people’s ability to make choices about their own body, but it just kind of sucks to have to breastfeed during math class."
Look, I’m not advocating cannibalism, but if you ask me whether rich people or poor people taste better it’s rich people every time and twice on Sundays.
November 14, 2023 at 10:25 AM
Look, I’m not advocating cannibalism, but if you ask me whether rich people or poor people taste better it’s rich people every time and twice on Sundays.
I don’t know, man. Shooting your way out of minor inconveniences, calling motherfuckers “galoots”… maybe Yosemite Sam had it right all along.
November 4, 2023 at 6:52 PM
I don’t know, man. Shooting your way out of minor inconveniences, calling motherfuckers “galoots”… maybe Yosemite Sam had it right all along.
“Don’t forget to set your clocks back an hour tonight!”
Do you hear yourself? You rube, you buffoon. Set your clo… who are you even helping? Farmers? They have roosters, and they’re already awake.
Do even hear how stupid you sound? “Get off your duffs boys, we’re gonna save daylight!” Idiots.
Do you hear yourself? You rube, you buffoon. Set your clo… who are you even helping? Farmers? They have roosters, and they’re already awake.
Do even hear how stupid you sound? “Get off your duffs boys, we’re gonna save daylight!” Idiots.
November 4, 2023 at 10:51 AM
“Don’t forget to set your clocks back an hour tonight!”
Do you hear yourself? You rube, you buffoon. Set your clo… who are you even helping? Farmers? They have roosters, and they’re already awake.
Do even hear how stupid you sound? “Get off your duffs boys, we’re gonna save daylight!” Idiots.
Do you hear yourself? You rube, you buffoon. Set your clo… who are you even helping? Farmers? They have roosters, and they’re already awake.
Do even hear how stupid you sound? “Get off your duffs boys, we’re gonna save daylight!” Idiots.
Hurricane Tammy is about 185 miles that a way, which is muting my first light pics.
I hate to give 45* any credit, but we’ve got some bad ombrés out there, and we’ve got to do something’s about it.
I hate to give 45* any credit, but we’ve got some bad ombrés out there, and we’ve got to do something’s about it.
October 22, 2023 at 9:51 AM
Hurricane Tammy is about 185 miles that a way, which is muting my first light pics.
I hate to give 45* any credit, but we’ve got some bad ombrés out there, and we’ve got to do something’s about it.
I hate to give 45* any credit, but we’ve got some bad ombrés out there, and we’ve got to do something’s about it.
Reposted by Unemployable Man
I nominate Air Bud for Speaker of the House
October 20, 2023 at 6:44 AM
I nominate Air Bud for Speaker of the House
Repost with how people would know if you suddenly became rich
October 20, 2023 at 11:29 AM
Repost with how people would know if you suddenly became rich
Weatherman says rain is possible after 2pm today, but Rain? If you’re out there listening, I want you to know that you’re possible every minute of every day. If you could see what I see in you… I guess I just want you to believe in yourself the way I believe in you.
October 20, 2023 at 11:26 AM
Weatherman says rain is possible after 2pm today, but Rain? If you’re out there listening, I want you to know that you’re possible every minute of every day. If you could see what I see in you… I guess I just want you to believe in yourself the way I believe in you.
Deplurarlize a band
U1
U1
depluralize a band
bad brain
bad brain
depluralize a band
1 Non-Blonde
1 Non-Blonde
October 19, 2023 at 7:18 PM
Deplurarlize a band
U1
U1
I think Gym Jordan’s bid for the speakership will be entertaining as well. www.politico.com/live-updates...
October 4, 2023 at 3:35 AM
I think Gym Jordan’s bid for the speakership will be entertaining as well. www.politico.com/live-updates...
Reposted by Unemployable Man
#CraftyTunes #MusicChallenge
Day 2 Glass/Stained
Starbelly - Made Of Glass
A favorite Power Pop band from Maryland
youtu.be/GjhghKjk5hQ?...
Day 2 Glass/Stained
Starbelly - Made Of Glass
A favorite Power Pop band from Maryland
youtu.be/GjhghKjk5hQ?...
Made of Glass
Provided to YouTube by DistroKidMade of Glass · StarbellyLemon Fresh℗ Notlame RecordsReleased on: 1998-11-24Auto-generated by YouTube.
youtu.be
October 2, 2023 at 10:14 AM
#CraftyTunes #MusicChallenge
Day 2 Glass/Stained
Starbelly - Made Of Glass
A favorite Power Pop band from Maryland
youtu.be/GjhghKjk5hQ?...
Day 2 Glass/Stained
Starbelly - Made Of Glass
A favorite Power Pop band from Maryland
youtu.be/GjhghKjk5hQ?...