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a few small beers

@atomicgiant.bsky.social

1K followers 920 following 4.8K posts

alex gradet // he/him writer/producer/director/editor for hire gradet.com // fivegreatminutes.substack.com i could be smoking a joint and watching jan de bont's "speed" on dvd, yet i am here. Слава Україні // йди на хуй Краснов

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · Nov 14

HI NEW FOLLOWERS!

A few things about me:

1. My feed is my cocktail party, act right or get blocked
2. Trans rights are human rights
3. Nazis can eat shit
4. I once highfived Joseph Gordon Levitt at the SNL afterparty
5. I’m open to work for yr writing/directing/producing/editing needs (gradet.com)

gradet.com

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 2h

You wish to have the curse reversed?
I’ll need a certain potion first!
Go to the wood and bring me back:
One: the apple bottom jeans
Two: the boots with the fur
Three: the baggy sweatpants
Four: the Reeboks with the straps!

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 3h

Bc he doesn’t want victory, he wants subservience.

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 23h

💔💔💔💔

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

a man in a military uniform salutes with his hand on his hat

ALT: a man in a military uniform salutes with his hand on his hat

media.tenor.com

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

oh man is the shiv ok?

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

It's probably 𝐂𝐎ol that the fine 𝐔𝐏stan𝐃in' g𝐄nerals who were at 𝐓h𝐀t Hegseth 𝐓alk last week aren't getting paid rn.

CNN @cnn.com · 1d

Top Republicans in Congress will take a massive gamble on shutdown politics in the coming days: GOP leaders will not step in to prevent missed paychecks to the military.

GOP leaders steadfast in shutdown stance despite rising pressure inside party | CNN Politics

Top Republicans in Congress will take a massive gamble on shutdown politics in the coming days: GOP leaders will not step in to prevent missed paychecks to the military.

www.cnn.com

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

one autocrat at a time

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Me (nonchalantly leaning against the giant cardboard headshot discs from the 1978 tokyo star wars marquee in the middle of my living room that I've hastily covered with a tarp):

Uh, I think if I'd *invented time travel* I'd tell people about it.

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

No YOU thought that was a bigass t-rex at first glance

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

1 From Dusk Till Dawn
2 Rosemary's Baby
3 Phantom of the Paradise
4 X
5 Hausu
6 Saloum

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

shorter judge:

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Brain: You know what you need to do next --
Me: oh god not you too, i just woke up
Brain: 𝘋𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘺?
Me: come on, not --
Brain: ROZ AL GHUL

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

brb building a gundam that’s just an 80’ david byrne suit

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Big fan. Haven’t been in a minute.

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Brain: Time to close the laptop for the night.
Vape Pen: Dr. Frasier Bane.
Brain: Come on, my eyes are exhausted--
Vape Pen: DR. FRASIER BANE.

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Bonkers way to do an admin reveal, Thomas Pynchon.

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

It's very possible.

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

I adore Rian Johnson but have to stay suspicious bc he has, to date, directed the final onscreen appearances of Angela Lansbury, Stephen Sondheim, Maximilian Schell & Christopher Plummer, now I'm not suggesting foul play, but who would ever suspect the guy writing m*rder mysteries ...?

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Meanwhile, in the timeline where the Academy doesn't hate horror:

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

I'm putting together a team

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Danceable?

Star Spangled Banner: Technically you could waltz to it, bc it's in 3/4 time, but *would* you?

Praise You by Fatboy Slim: Your honor, I'd like to present Exhibit Alpha and Motherfucking Omega, the defense rests.

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Written by:

Star Spangled Banner: Francis Scott Key owned slaves

Praise You by Fatboy Slim: Seeing how he's been a famous white man for 30 years, the fact that Norman "Fatboy Slim" Cook doesn't have any allegations on him should be considered a goddamn miracle.

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a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Word Count:

Star Spangled Banner: 80 (and that's just the words we sing at sporting events), in a confusingly-phrased tangle of questions and statements.

Praise You by Fatboy Slim: 28, in three declarative sentences.

a few small beers @atomicgiant.bsky.social · 1d

Singable Melody:

Star Spangled Banner: ❌

Praise You by Fatboy Slim: Try *not* singing it