Meghan
banner
deloisivete.bsky.social
Meghan
@deloisivete.bsky.social
3.6K followers 720 following 290 posts
surrounded by a chaos of my own making My posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:rhjpww65fgvbp2txyhl2zksb/feed/aaac2f5bigl42
Posts Media Videos Starter Packs
Pinned
Just popped a second ibuprofen, so yeah, I party
Reposted by Meghan
Based on research, I have concluded that when my toddler says ”you look so pretty, Mommy”, What she means is, “you’re not wearing leggings and I didn’t know you own real clothes”
Reposted by Meghan
Wife: The new neighbors are so quiet

Me: I knew moving next door to a black hole would pay off

Wife: something else just got sucked off the porch

Me: meh, it’s worth it
Vacuumed up some dried lavender that spilled and it smelled pretty good, follow me for more homemaking tips
Reposted by Meghan
New pope: (walks into the Vatican carrying a sink)

The whole world: omg no
Reposted by Meghan
especially now I think it’s important to underscore the importance of now especially
Reposted by Meghan
in England, "strawberry" sounds like "robbery" and that's all you need to know about them maybe
Reposted by Meghan
If you love something, set if free. If it comes back that means no one else wanted it. Set it free again.
Reposted by Meghan
My husband is out of town, but the cupboard doors are still open, so now I have to face some hard truths about myself
Reposted by Meghan
Subway should be able to make me a little charcuterie plate
Reposted by Meghan
YOU: Yes
I: No
YOU: Stop
I: Go Go Go
(Oh No)
YOU: Goodbye
I: Hello, Hello, Hello
YOU: Goodbye
I: Hello, Hello, Hello

- Paul McCartney, Playwright
My husband is out of town, but the cupboard doors are still open, so now I have to face some hard truths about myself
Reposted by Meghan
an inferiority complex? you mean dilutions of grandeur?
Reposted by Meghan
rip jesus you would have hated la croix
Reposted by Meghan
I can’t believe there’s a movie called, “IT,” and it’s not about playing tag.
I'm not saying I don't have a green thumb, I'm just saying my kids have started calling one part of the dining room "dead plant corner"
me: I'm not old

also me: *realizes the number of meteorologists I follow on social media is not zero*
Reposted by Meghan
Welp, I just reached my move goal.
<refuses to move again until tomorrow>
Reposted by Meghan
they probably had to name it ‘scoliosis’ because ‘s-curvy’ was taken
Reposted by Meghan
I asked my kid to help me convince his toddler sister to put her boots on. He was successful! Unfortunately, his trick was to tell her that I’d give her chocolate if she put her boots on. I don’t have any chocolate.
Reposted by Meghan
Boss: Can you work late tonight?

Me: Sure, let me quickly move the webcam so you can explain to my dog why there’ll be no couch cuddles tonight

Dog:

Boss: Go home, you can finish it tomorrow
Reposted by Meghan
I’m gonna try to go to bed early this week [goes to bed even later than usual every single night]
Check your Hesperus before you wreck your Hesperus
What is botox if not a murder of crow’s feet