Eris Montez
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erismontez.bsky.social
Eris Montez
@erismontez.bsky.social
They/Them 🇵🇭🇺🇸 Friendly neighborhood arachnochist. Discordihuh. Relative to Aneris and high fiving. Pecan pie w/o the pecans. Bartender because everything else sucks. insta/twitch: ErisMontez

Wont follow but I'll list. I'm trying to keep that 69. Nice
Pinned
*screms in typos*
a cup of coffee with a smiley face on the top of it
ALT: a cup of coffee with a smiley face on the top of it
media.tenor.com
I didn’t even like this shoe nor did I watch much of this and I can hear this in the Coach’s voice.

Yeah. I wish I could go back in time and unlearn this bit. The blowjob one. I don’t mind hearing this being said in that voice.
“He blew him, Brendan. He blew Bubba and now Putin has a picture of it. Makes sense though. If a guy sucks your dick you have to invite him to your daughter’s wedding, it’s part of the code. The brojob code, Brendan”
November 15, 2025 at 12:39 PM
One of the main reasons why I’ve pulled away from instagram. I’m sure I’m missing out on some awesome memes from friends but… I really don’t want to fucking have a constant stream of AI slop slapping my face constantly.
every time i open instagram
November 15, 2025 at 11:43 AM
Ok. I think it’s time to mute the ketchup post on my end. There is only so much time and desire I really want to sit and talk or write about ketchup. Even if it is one of my favorite condiments, I don’t like it enough to fixate or read THAT much about it.
November 15, 2025 at 11:41 AM
I just found the Garth Brooks is a murderer rabbit hole. I don’t know if I should stop and run or press go.
November 15, 2025 at 10:32 AM
I just love smelling like a bonfire / wood smoke. I could live on this smell forever.
November 15, 2025 at 9:49 AM
I just use a bidet and bidet towels. Haven’t looked back since. (Trying to figure out how long it takes before the rolls save me money, I just know I haven’t bought any TP in ages/ one reg roll in the shared bathroom with my bidet towel lasts over a month)
The fuckin bears did it. They built the toilet paper MOAB
November 15, 2025 at 9:23 AM
Reposted by Eris Montez
A local bakery just posted this photo on Facebook. I’ve gotten stuff from her before. Nice older lady. I do not know if she made it but…it’s perfect. Perfect.
November 15, 2025 at 4:07 AM
Reposted by Eris Montez
Every intricate element narrates a tale intricately intertwined with opulence and elegance.

“Long Live McQueen” by Richard Burbridge featuring Alexander McQueen by Lee Alexander McQueen SS ‘07 “Sarabande” collection styled by Jay Massacret in V Magazine via McQueen Vault"

#beautifulbizarre #art
November 15, 2025 at 7:30 AM
Part of why I got a pillbug tattoo. What little cuties they are. 🥺
Mood, by noonsillustrations on IG.
November 14, 2025 at 6:27 PM
Reposted by Eris Montez
Holy shit
True comedy is watching Dave Portnay trying to use a hammer
November 14, 2025 at 5:18 PM
Alleged answer in the comments. I don’t know what to say if this is true outside of, this may be a thing I just… was ok with not knowing.
pour one out for nancy reagan losing her title as white house throat goat
November 14, 2025 at 6:02 PM
For those who are pro book bans but only in the sense of banning “poorly written” books, if we banned said things.. then we’d never have the Twilight movies.

And that movie series is a cultural feast for the soul.

I may not care for the books, but holy shit those movies cure all that ail me.
November 14, 2025 at 5:52 PM
Reposted by Eris Montez
In all the political chaos, it’s easy to lose sight of other global crises.

Typhoon Fung-wong devastated the Philippines this week, at least 18 dead and over 1.4 million displaced. 💔

Climate change is making communities more vulnerable. We need bold action now.

apnews.com/article/typh...
Storm approaches Taiwan after causing 18 deaths and destruction in the Philippines
Typhoon Fung-wong has blown out of the northwestern Philippines after causing floods and landslides.
apnews.com
November 14, 2025 at 5:34 PM
Reposted by Eris Montez
Happy Partially Muscled Skeleton Stands by the Perimeter Fence and Screams for 30 Seconds Before Vanishing Day to all who observe.
November 14, 2025 at 3:42 PM
As a short person who looked very young for most of their life… it was the realization that the allure of me was that I looked like a kid that made me be extremely wary when it came to folks attracted to me.
in america, everyone is a pedophile
November 14, 2025 at 5:04 PM
And for my next trick… is hot dog a sandwich?

*eyes notifications* I sure as hell will have to mute this one if it rockets off into space.
November 14, 2025 at 5:03 PM
I would like to state that… restaurants should not try to make their version of ketchup. Heinz got that good good. Unless you got that recipe on lock? It’s just sad tomato soup.
November 14, 2025 at 7:00 AM
Reposted by Eris Montez
the way basic human decency hits these days is crazy
So the streamer Ludwig recently found out that one of his earliest regular viewers, who was trans, passed away and tonight he's doing a charity stream for the Trevor Project. So far he's raised over $46,000 in about 5 hours. www.twitch.tv/ludwig
November 14, 2025 at 3:25 AM
Reposted by Eris Montez
everything is a joke but nothing is funny anymore
October 8, 2025 at 5:13 AM
My scent range for my personal preference now ranges from cupcake sweetness to old creaky dusty church.
November 13, 2025 at 8:22 PM
Wish I could be surprised but given the lifetime of being witness to shit like this. Yep. Of course this was how it was handled.
"One of the first people to make public allegations against now-deceased billionaire child sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein was Ava Cordero, a transgender Latina woman. Cordero, a model, was transphobically mocked in the media after she filed an October 2007 lawsuit"
When a trans woman first accused Jeffrey Epstein of rape, the media mocked her - LGBTQ Nation
The New York Post called her a "man" and a "gender-bend shocker."
www.lgbtqnation.com
November 13, 2025 at 8:12 PM
Woah. It comes with a little crossbow!?! Of course!?! What kind of monster wouldn’t want to play a little plant guy. He’s just a guy. 🥹
Who doesn’t want to play a carnivorous plant?

🧵↓
November 13, 2025 at 8:06 PM
Reposted by Eris Montez
i don’t even read my own emails and you expect me to comb through someone else’s? and a pedophile, no less?? no thank you.
November 13, 2025 at 8:00 PM
*Eyes constant stream of interaction on the tastebud post*

Woah. I never thought. Oh. I see. I see why people tend to mute posts that seem to strike a chord this way. 👁️👄👁️
November 13, 2025 at 8:04 PM
Reposted by Eris Montez
November 13, 2025 at 8:21 AM