Emily
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otherpens.bsky.social
Emily
@otherpens.bsky.social
150 followers 520 following 1.8K posts
Reader, I ate his heart in the marketplace. she/her
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Reposted by Emily
i think this goose sweatshirt might fix me
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Timeline cleanser, here’s Dolly Parton holding a cat ✨
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not finishing what you started isn’t always lazy, sometimes it’s ok to just say fuck that shit
Waiting until it drops onto BritBox 🥲
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May these possums shouting in Werner Herzog's voice bring comfort to your day.
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It is 29°C and I have started a brewery in the previously vacant lot where my bra rubs underneath my boobs.
Please let someone go trekking across the icy wastes pulled by a team of kinksters in collars.
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“I asked ChatGPT.”

Ok, well I dialed 1-800-MISS-CLEO because she said “CALL ME NOW,” so I did and now I owe her $138 but I know when I’m going to die
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Omg, 😍.

“This is a site for pictures of owls… in towels.”

owlsintowels.org
They want them to have ADHD with poor emotional regulation and literally be stressed to tears over the pettiest shit????? That’s definitely a thing but I don’t know that it makes for compelling fiction.
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“Joke’s on you, I actually look super cute in this tube top.”
🎸THAT AIN’T WORKIN
THAT’S THE WAY YOU DO IT
MONEY FOR NOTHIN
AND YOUR CHICKS FOR FREE🤪
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There's a secret to folding a fitted sheet and it's simple: have low expectations
Dangit, I could’ve run on that platform myself!
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I'm so pumped, let's pull an 1814 and convince the British to burn down the White House again.
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Common grackle coming in to land 🪶
“God forgives, but only my financial and sex crimes that make me a parasite and a danger to my community, not your demands for basic human rights.” 😎
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Final_Version_of_Tarrifs_actualFINALcopy_version7_USETHISONE.docx
You’d think there would have been SOME shred of a Teachable Moment for Wall Street after of the entire Bernie Madoff situation, and yet…
I am not immune to having brain-dead takes. 🙊💐
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Woman during a zombie outbreak: I have a bite mark on my arm and a high fever.

Doctor: Have you tried losing weight