Author | Lightnews

Pasha Paterson

@zer0bandwidth.bsky.social

130 followers 76 following 1.6K posts

A professional geek. This one time, on Jeopardy, I got to respond correctly with "What is Nine Inch Nails?" and it made my day. This profile consists mainly of three things: #Jeopardy, #FFXIV, #simracing twitch.tv/zer0bandwidth

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Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · Sep 6

BlueSky finally supports this now, so, I shall repeat the post that is pinned to my Twitter profile:
Credits and thanks to Jeb H for the best GIF ever.
#Jeopardy #NIN

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Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 7h

Cosigned.

Qasim Rashid, Esq. @qasimrashid.com · 8h

I’m good with my taxes subsidizing social welfare for people who can’t afford food.

I’m enraged with my taxes subsidizing corporate welfare to businesses that won’t pay a living wage.

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 20h

I did *not* expect to check "First Scrape of Ice Off the Windshield" from my 2025-2026 school year bingo card on October 24th. #RVA 🥶

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Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 1d

I want to see all the training games with other former J! players vs. the not-quite-ready-for-primetime Watson.

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 1d

The President of the United States of America posted an AI-generated video depicting him dumping giant globs of feces onto his own people. Officials are responding to inquiries from the media with "Your mom." I think we're there.

Reposted by Pasha Paterson

Jenny & Butlerian War Elephants @j-jordan-poet.bsky.social · 1d

Huh.

ACECO's website seems to be about as informative as the website of the architecture firm that designed the ballroom. 🤔 Very curious! Giving me strong "Erdogan's new airport" vibes.

Aaron Rupar @atrupar.com · 1d

a live look this morning at the demolished East Wing of the White House

Reposted by Pasha Paterson

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · Jul 17

I am so goddamn tired of being ashamed of my country and countrymen.

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Reposted by Pasha Paterson

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · Sep 3

You could replace the entire executive branch with the worst 11-year-olds you can remember from middle school, and change essentially nothing.

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Reposted by Pasha Paterson

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · Sep 10

Another morning, another heavy sigh as the progressive will of the entire human race continues to be dragged backward by the nonsensical actions of a handful of elderly, narcissistic sociopaths.

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Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 2d

[ ACHIEVEMENT UNCOUGHED ]

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 2d

Hey, you.
Yeah. You.
Stop this sickness stuff.
Get better.
You hear me?
Do it.
😘

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Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 2d

Maybe not *most* known for, but—

a black and white checkered pattern with a rainbow colored background

Alt: An animation of a black-and-white checkered pattern where the rows or columns of black squares occasionally move. Bonus for people who read the alt text: Azure once sent me this picture from their "teen girl angst" period, wearing a checker-patterned swimsuit, and that was (cough cough) years ago, and I sure do still remember it. Sadly, I may have lost the copy I had? Hmm.

media.tenor.com

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 2d

Y'all remember that architecture model that showed the entire East Wing gone and replaced with Shitburger Hall, right? The one nobody thought he'd be shitty enough to try? Come on. If there's one thing you should have figured out about Demon J Troompaloompa by now, it's that he's infinitely shitty.

Reposted by Pasha Paterson

🦔 Evie 🏳️‍⚧️ @notkimboslice.bsky.social · 6d

Vance is very much the "little brother with the unplugged controller" of politicians

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Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 2d

A secondary concern, to be sure, but the contractor who agreed to take the job of (checks notes) illegally tearing down the East Wing of the White House during a government shutdown, while the panel whose approval is required is unable to do so, needs to be driven right the hell out of business.

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Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 4d

Imagine being the contractor who actually agreed to this job.

"Sure, yeah, I'll be totally OK with *tearing off the east end of the White House*."

There is just no bottom to the pit, is there.

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 5d

"This is a dignified realm of nobility, honor, and knightly chivalry."

(moments later)

"This donkey's name is Badonka, and his previous owner was a hermit named Honk O'Tonk."

#TabletopGaming

Reposted by Pasha Paterson

Brian Tyler Cohen @briantylercohen.bsky.social · 6d

NYPD announces that zero arrests were made at the massive No Kings protests today after Republicans spent days claiming the protestors are violent terrorists.

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Reposted by Pasha Paterson

The Argonauts (FFXIV) @ffxivargonauts.bsky.social · 6d

Even the fantasy world of #FFXIV doesn't have any kings (because their people got rid of them all). #NoKings

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Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 7d

omg release the Mrs Doubtfire outtakes
#Jeopardy

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 7d

Half of my daughter's playlists are music that was on the radio when I was her age, and it all happened organically (from friends, etc), so either the music really is good, or my daughter's entire circle of friends are being raised by "cool parents" who have all entrapped them thusly.

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 7d

It still blows my mind that we have seen the Demon J Troompaloompa administration speed-run through practically every heinous act that was listed as a grievance in the Declaration of Independence in less than a single year, and yet those who took oaths to protect from such things remain placid.

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 7d

Sitting at my desk on a Friday morning, minding my own business, when some process in my brain flash-banged me with this potential protest sign:

THE LAST PRESIDENT
TO ATTACK THIS MANY
* * * AMERICANS * * *
WAS JEFFERSON DAVIS

Gee I wonder if there will be an opportunity to use it soon.

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 8d

"But how else will you see the middle contestant's soul leaving his body when the champ nails an all-in Daily Double?" asks a man who was that guy clearly visible next to a certain bartender.

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 8d

You are in a maze of twisty images, each slightly different.

Pasha Paterson @zer0bandwidth.bsky.social · 8d

I show the flags on the inventory screen, with the mouseover tooltips up, which show how the banners were constructed. There are some closeups at the end. And if you don't have an ad blocker, wow, I did not realize how bad Imgur has become with inline junk ads.