@greenmamba.bsky.social
Rose Bowl Commercial: We've built a Cybertruck entirely out of flowers!!!
Roundup - Monsanto: Listen, I know we've not always made good choices, but this was what I was born to do.
America: Suit up, kid. Let's see what you've got. Also, for real, suit up. You know that shit gives you Lupus.
Roundup - Monsanto: Listen, I know we've not always made good choices, but this was what I was born to do.
America: Suit up, kid. Let's see what you've got. Also, for real, suit up. You know that shit gives you Lupus.
January 1, 2026 at 2:41 PM
Rose Bowl Commercial: We've built a Cybertruck entirely out of flowers!!!
Roundup - Monsanto: Listen, I know we've not always made good choices, but this was what I was born to do.
America: Suit up, kid. Let's see what you've got. Also, for real, suit up. You know that shit gives you Lupus.
Roundup - Monsanto: Listen, I know we've not always made good choices, but this was what I was born to do.
America: Suit up, kid. Let's see what you've got. Also, for real, suit up. You know that shit gives you Lupus.
It is wild to me that we let people who buy Copperfit stuff vote. By all means live your life, but you shouldn't be bothered with choices the rest of us have to live with.
January 1, 2026 at 1:44 PM
It is wild to me that we let people who buy Copperfit stuff vote. By all means live your life, but you shouldn't be bothered with choices the rest of us have to live with.
I just need everyone in this house to understand I am not personally responsible for the advertising content on ESPN. But I promise to bring it up with Bob Iger at the spring Illuminati / Eyes Wide Shut / pot luck.
December 31, 2025 at 2:15 AM
I just need everyone in this house to understand I am not personally responsible for the advertising content on ESPN. But I promise to bring it up with Bob Iger at the spring Illuminati / Eyes Wide Shut / pot luck.
Reposted
its honestly a pretty big responsibility being the last person on the planet with any understanding of spatial awareness when out in public among a large group
December 29, 2025 at 4:52 PM
its honestly a pretty big responsibility being the last person on the planet with any understanding of spatial awareness when out in public among a large group
Hey college engineering students. Forget data science. Make a remote that doesn't get lost in the couch cushions. There's way more money in that and you get to keep your soul.
December 29, 2025 at 4:28 PM
Hey college engineering students. Forget data science. Make a remote that doesn't get lost in the couch cushions. There's way more money in that and you get to keep your soul.
Reposted
another day working at the japanese artificial mouth company. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the artificial mouth. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it
This is an artificial mouth created by Japanese researchers. It uses artificial vocal cords, a trachea system, and a flexible silicone mouth that moves and shapes sound in real time.
It sounds so human-like!
It sounds so human-like!
December 29, 2025 at 1:02 AM
another day working at the japanese artificial mouth company. everyone keeps asking me if they can fuck the artificial mouth. buddy, they wont even let me fuck it
I've launched SHIRE, an app that protects you from crime BY the wealthy!
Excited to announce GOLLUM, an app that helps you focus on your most precious possession!
Sauron is appearing on the scene as concerns rise about crime among the most wealthy.
December 29, 2025 at 3:29 AM
I've launched SHIRE, an app that protects you from crime BY the wealthy!
Reposted
emerging nude from a large glowing orb next to a denny’s dumpster
December 28, 2025 at 1:19 PM
emerging nude from a large glowing orb next to a denny’s dumpster
If someone in the Arsenal fan base has not yet nicknamed Mikel Merino "wool"
yet, get with it.
yet, get with it.
December 27, 2025 at 3:44 PM
If someone in the Arsenal fan base has not yet nicknamed Mikel Merino "wool"
yet, get with it.
yet, get with it.
My in-law's cable subscription programming seems to exclusively feature recent murders, home shopping, Wayans brothers movies and browns you should be suspicious of.
December 26, 2025 at 5:07 PM
My in-law's cable subscription programming seems to exclusively feature recent murders, home shopping, Wayans brothers movies and browns you should be suspicious of.
I just missed my protected left turn because the teenagers in the Jeep in front of me had an old fashioned Chinese fire drill. I think the kids are gonna be alright, you guys.
December 23, 2025 at 5:40 PM
I just missed my protected left turn because the teenagers in the Jeep in front of me had an old fashioned Chinese fire drill. I think the kids are gonna be alright, you guys.
I don't know who needs to hear this, but if your employees are camped out in the bathroom on their phones because it's the only safe space, your work culture is toxic.
December 22, 2025 at 5:27 PM
I don't know who needs to hear this, but if your employees are camped out in the bathroom on their phones because it's the only safe space, your work culture is toxic.
The TV commercial where the young boy-girl siblings just use ChatGPT to fully plan a first road trip for them rather than spending 30 minutes to look at a map and just connect and share their interests and curiosities and common humanity is the most depressing thing I've ever seen.
December 21, 2025 at 2:35 AM
The TV commercial where the young boy-girl siblings just use ChatGPT to fully plan a first road trip for them rather than spending 30 minutes to look at a map and just connect and share their interests and curiosities and common humanity is the most depressing thing I've ever seen.
You know Sean McVay must have a "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" sized mashed potato mountain of Bolivian cocaine laced with human growth hormone "just to take the edge off, bro!" in his office.
December 19, 2025 at 3:51 AM
You know Sean McVay must have a "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" sized mashed potato mountain of Bolivian cocaine laced with human growth hormone "just to take the edge off, bro!" in his office.
Somewhere in the distance you can hear a fragile conservative man smashing a mostly completed Lego Star Destroyer while screaming, "THAT'S A FUCKING MAN'S JOB!!!!!" at the TV when he notices Sarah Thomas is the Downs Judge on the officiating crew for Thursday Night Football.
December 19, 2025 at 3:25 AM
Somewhere in the distance you can hear a fragile conservative man smashing a mostly completed Lego Star Destroyer while screaming, "THAT'S A FUCKING MAN'S JOB!!!!!" at the TV when he notices Sarah Thomas is the Downs Judge on the officiating crew for Thursday Night Football.
I once read "The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich" while delayed in airports. The most interesting part was Hitler's insane jealousy of his half brother Alois who was a very ordinary bartender. For decades customers would ask Alois about Adolf, and he would just basically say, woof that messy bitch.
December 18, 2025 at 10:25 PM
I once read "The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich" while delayed in airports. The most interesting part was Hitler's insane jealousy of his half brother Alois who was a very ordinary bartender. For decades customers would ask Alois about Adolf, and he would just basically say, woof that messy bitch.
If you also have not read the Chuck Tingle Wikipedia article I highly recommend it. Mood has been greatly improved.
December 18, 2025 at 9:22 PM
If you also have not read the Chuck Tingle Wikipedia article I highly recommend it. Mood has been greatly improved.
Reposted
The early bird might get the worm but they didn’t get all the worms because I looked around and baby there’s still worms
December 4, 2025 at 6:17 PM
The early bird might get the worm but they didn’t get all the worms because I looked around and baby there’s still worms
Reposted
It takes 3 ghosts to reform 1 billionaire, how many ghosts do we have
December 18, 2025 at 3:25 PM
It takes 3 ghosts to reform 1 billionaire, how many ghosts do we have
Sometimes relationships are just hearing your partner in another room loudly booing shit.
December 18, 2025 at 3:13 AM
Sometimes relationships are just hearing your partner in another room loudly booing shit.
Reposted
Christmas night: "But Santa, you've hardly touched your Zardoz cookies."
December 14, 2025 at 4:26 PM
Christmas night: "But Santa, you've hardly touched your Zardoz cookies."
On the way home I passed a port-o-potty pumping truck with no logo or company name. The only thing written on its side was "NOT MILK". And the fact that it was completely necessary to say that explains a lot about our culture.
December 11, 2025 at 8:18 PM
On the way home I passed a port-o-potty pumping truck with no logo or company name. The only thing written on its side was "NOT MILK". And the fact that it was completely necessary to say that explains a lot about our culture.
Reposted
Movies in the 80s had zero fucks to give and I watched them all.
80s Movies I Watched More Than Once — Banned Library
The majority of my childhood was consuming media. Reading books while the television was on kinda kid. Because of this and an aunt who got us free HBO, I had a steady stream of low budget movies going...
www.bannedlibrary.com
December 10, 2025 at 8:55 PM
Movies in the 80s had zero fucks to give and I watched them all.
Reposted
Glad I learned how to conserve water in elementary school so AI can suggest glue as a pizza topping
December 10, 2025 at 2:26 AM
Glad I learned how to conserve water in elementary school so AI can suggest glue as a pizza topping
You guys, who told Howie Mandel he was cool? Shame on you.
December 8, 2025 at 1:43 PM
You guys, who told Howie Mandel he was cool? Shame on you.