Matt Sims
@mercifull.com
(Ex)Viral poster, “comedian”, radio producer, cosplaying dad, failed YouTuber, 80s fanboy & one of the UKs lowest ranked pinballers. Views expressed are my own. @Mercifull in most places.
Last minute panic buying for the wife…
December 24, 2025 at 11:36 AM
Last minute panic buying for the wife…
"In the United States of America you don't have to apologize for being white anymore"
December 22, 2025 at 9:11 AM
"In the United States of America you don't have to apologize for being white anymore"
No snap 2025 election then.
Starmer will ‘absolutely’ still be prime minister by next Christmas, says Labour chair – UK politics live
Starmer will ‘absolutely’ still be prime minister by next Christmas, says Labour chair – UK politics live
Anna Turley says people will start to ‘see and feel’ change in public services and cost of living from next year
www.theguardian.com
December 21, 2025 at 5:34 PM
No snap 2025 election then.
Can you believe it’s been a year since I went to New York.
December 21, 2025 at 9:25 AM
Can you believe it’s been a year since I went to New York.
Reposted by Matt Sims
Reposted by Matt Sims
When I was working at an event recently I had the opportunity to meet Walliams. I refused to even look at him. Didn’t even want to give him the satisfaction of my audience. At the time I was told I was being weird. Feel somewhat vindicated now.
December 19, 2025 at 5:44 PM
When I was working at an event recently I had the opportunity to meet Walliams. I refused to even look at him. Didn’t even want to give him the satisfaction of my audience. At the time I was told I was being weird. Feel somewhat vindicated now.
This and Tom Scott’s video from a few years ago are just the exact thing we need at this time of year. My daughter (6) who goes to the same primary school as I did has the first verse the same as I learnt but is very much in the Uncle Billy camp… much to her amusement.
For your collective delectation this holiday season:
Quite possibly the silliest thing I've ever written (and definitely the most ridiculous graph I've ever made!)
loreandordure.com/2025/12/16/j...
Quite possibly the silliest thing I've ever written (and definitely the most ridiculous graph I've ever made!)
loreandordure.com/2025/12/16/j...
Jingle Bells (Batman Smells): an incomplete festive folk-rhyme taxonomy
Gather round the fire, everyone, and let me tell you a story. It has everything you could want in a Christmas blockbuster: superheroes and villains, a car crash, children singing, a mystery to solv…
loreandordure.com
December 16, 2025 at 11:11 PM
This and Tom Scott’s video from a few years ago are just the exact thing we need at this time of year. My daughter (6) who goes to the same primary school as I did has the first verse the same as I learnt but is very much in the Uncle Billy camp… much to her amusement.
Reposted by Matt Sims
For your collective delectation this holiday season:
Quite possibly the silliest thing I've ever written (and definitely the most ridiculous graph I've ever made!)
loreandordure.com/2025/12/16/j...
Quite possibly the silliest thing I've ever written (and definitely the most ridiculous graph I've ever made!)
loreandordure.com/2025/12/16/j...
Jingle Bells (Batman Smells): an incomplete festive folk-rhyme taxonomy
Gather round the fire, everyone, and let me tell you a story. It has everything you could want in a Christmas blockbuster: superheroes and villains, a car crash, children singing, a mystery to solv…
loreandordure.com
December 16, 2025 at 5:06 PM
For your collective delectation this holiday season:
Quite possibly the silliest thing I've ever written (and definitely the most ridiculous graph I've ever made!)
loreandordure.com/2025/12/16/j...
Quite possibly the silliest thing I've ever written (and definitely the most ridiculous graph I've ever made!)
loreandordure.com/2025/12/16/j...
Reposted by Matt Sims
I do not want Gaston backstory, I do not need Gaston backstory, I reject Gaston backstory
he is a fully formed oaf, consuming eggs by the dozen in one of the greatest villain songs ever written, and that is all we need of him
he is a fully formed oaf, consuming eggs by the dozen in one of the greatest villain songs ever written, and that is all we need of him
Disney Developing Live-Action ‘Gaston’ Movie From Writer Dave Callaham And Producer Michelle Rejwan
Disney is in early development on a new live-action pic centered on the Beauty and the Beast character Gaston.
deadline.com
December 15, 2025 at 9:18 PM
I do not want Gaston backstory, I do not need Gaston backstory, I reject Gaston backstory
he is a fully formed oaf, consuming eggs by the dozen in one of the greatest villain songs ever written, and that is all we need of him
he is a fully formed oaf, consuming eggs by the dozen in one of the greatest villain songs ever written, and that is all we need of him
I’ve been playing #RuneScape for too long to fall for this luring scam.
December 13, 2025 at 11:53 PM
I’ve been playing #RuneScape for too long to fall for this luring scam.
Reposted by Matt Sims
I wil never take ozempic, because what if the time finally comes to eat the rich and I have no appetite?
December 13, 2025 at 8:21 AM
I wil never take ozempic, because what if the time finally comes to eat the rich and I have no appetite?
Think about it. All these Eurovision countries boycotting the next contest could be really good for the UK. At this rate we might even come second… out of two… behind Israel.
December 10, 2025 at 8:48 PM
Think about it. All these Eurovision countries boycotting the next contest could be really good for the UK. At this rate we might even come second… out of two… behind Israel.
Let’s be honest this is peak train livery and nobody can change my mind 🇬🇧 #greatbritishrailways #britishrail
December 10, 2025 at 7:25 AM
Let’s be honest this is peak train livery and nobody can change my mind 🇬🇧 #greatbritishrailways #britishrail
Reposted by Matt Sims
Plex Submits $35 Bid For Warner Bros.
Plex Submits $35 Bid For Warner Bros.
LOS GATOS, CA—In an attempt to fend off growing competition from Paramount and Netflix, Plex CEO Keith Valory announced Monday that the streaming platform had submitted a $35 bid for Warner Bros. Disc...
theonion.com
December 8, 2025 at 10:30 PM
Plex Submits $35 Bid For Warner Bros.
Finally some good news.
It’s two perfectly identical snowflakes about to collide, the improbability of which will cause the end of all existence.
December 3, 2025 at 8:56 AM
Finally some good news.
The anti-woke president.
Trump dozes while Marco Rubio speaks to him directly next to him. Just insane optics.
December 3, 2025 at 7:28 AM
The anti-woke president.
Tfw you go to check on your 5 hour 3d print after “starting” it 4 hours ago and it’s sat there with nothing on the bed awaiting for someone to press the reprint button.
a man with a mustache wearing a suit and tie is looking at the camera
Alt: a man with a mustache wearing a suit and tie is looking at the camera
media.tenor.com
December 1, 2025 at 8:45 PM
Tfw you go to check on your 5 hour 3d print after “starting” it 4 hours ago and it’s sat there with nothing on the bed awaiting for someone to press the reprint button.
Introduce yourself with 5 cars you’ve owned
Peugeot 106
Peugeot 206
Honda Civic Type S
Toyota Proace City
Oh shit I’ve only had 4 vehicles in the 24 years I’ve been driving. Had the civic for 18 of them haha.
Peugeot 106
Peugeot 206
Honda Civic Type S
Toyota Proace City
Oh shit I’ve only had 4 vehicles in the 24 years I’ve been driving. Had the civic for 18 of them haha.
Introduce yourself with 5 cars you've owned
Mk2 Polo Coupe Sport
Mercedes C Class Coupe
Alfa Romeo GTV Cup
VW Tiguan
Nissan Juke
Mk2 Polo Coupe Sport
Mercedes C Class Coupe
Alfa Romeo GTV Cup
VW Tiguan
Nissan Juke
Introduce yourself with 5 cars you've owned
Peugeot 104
Volvo 244
Ford Escort mk1
Vauxhall Victor FB
British Leyland Mini Clubman
Peugeot 104
Volvo 244
Ford Escort mk1
Vauxhall Victor FB
British Leyland Mini Clubman
November 28, 2025 at 11:43 PM
Introduce yourself with 5 cars you’ve owned
Peugeot 106
Peugeot 206
Honda Civic Type S
Toyota Proace City
Oh shit I’ve only had 4 vehicles in the 24 years I’ve been driving. Had the civic for 18 of them haha.
Peugeot 106
Peugeot 206
Honda Civic Type S
Toyota Proace City
Oh shit I’ve only had 4 vehicles in the 24 years I’ve been driving. Had the civic for 18 of them haha.
Don’t worry, after this budget he’ll never be able to afford to move out.
My son is now 15. My wife argues with him constantly about his appalling personal habits. I'm secretly delighted as I am no longer the most disgusting person in the house. I almost don't want him to move out.
November 26, 2025 at 9:48 AM
Don’t worry, after this budget he’ll never be able to afford to move out.
Reposted by Matt Sims
Brexit has cost each and every one of us £3,700 a year.
But instead of solving the problem, Labour are using Brexit as an excuse to raise your taxes.
My message ahead of the Budget: Stop blaming Brexit and start fixing it!
But instead of solving the problem, Labour are using Brexit as an excuse to raise your taxes.
My message ahead of the Budget: Stop blaming Brexit and start fixing it!
November 25, 2025 at 4:02 PM
Brexit has cost each and every one of us £3,700 a year.
But instead of solving the problem, Labour are using Brexit as an excuse to raise your taxes.
My message ahead of the Budget: Stop blaming Brexit and start fixing it!
But instead of solving the problem, Labour are using Brexit as an excuse to raise your taxes.
My message ahead of the Budget: Stop blaming Brexit and start fixing it!
Reposted by Matt Sims
11 days apart. Brutal.
November 25, 2025 at 11:27 AM
11 days apart. Brutal.
Reposted by Matt Sims
there is ironically no better self roast than "I used an AI to come up with insults about you"
Everything about this might be the saddest thing I’ve ever seen
November 24, 2025 at 3:20 PM
there is ironically no better self roast than "I used an AI to come up with insults about you"