Don't look to me for leadership. Sometimes I let YouTube ads play until the end because I feel bad for them.

Guy in the "I Am Not Paris Hilton" hat looked really familiar.

Right on, congratulations!

UNCONVENTIONAL: This woman ran out of hot dog buns and is having hot dog on a hamburger bun. She must manipulate its form. Hot dog reborn

Theme of my journal: I should start writing in my journal.

Emojis and their skeletons:

➡️ -->
😃 (-_-)
🐌 @
🐔 <0
💚 <3
💪 La

possible & possibly fashionable un-earnest outrage forms (partial list):

bemused
smooth
jaunty
jazzy
arch
lilting
trilling
mock-thrilled
ironic (steely)
ironic (sexy)
knowingly obsequious
Mae West

"Ed Sheeran" sounds like a drunk person trying to remember the name "Edward Scissorhands"

Spiritually this just feels right.

😀

Decorative boulders say a lot about a person.

We’re pretty sure we saw David Duchovny water skiing on the river today.

Sharing a plate of fries with a one hit wonder from the 90s who’s let her teeth go badly enough for me to notice in the dimly lit brewpub with the help of some light from the sparklers on another patron’s birthday cheesecake as the waitresses clap in unison like deranged cult members at twilight.

This is the season where I dress like a taxidermist.

Please, enough questions about my hair care routine. I will reveal all at some point.

I absolutely cannot stop living my life by the #1 rule, which is party

one time my grandma gave me some life advice & it was this: never get between her & a bloomin’ onion from outback steakhouse. she also told me that in 5 billion years the sun will expand to the size of a red giant, gasifying the three inner planets, making existence quite futile.

You've always been a rebel.

Reading is really just for people who like words.

The only good thing to come out of a file cabinet is liquor.

We must either increase our chip integrity or reduce the viscosity of our dips

Hi I'm clowndro and I'm your candidate for state comptroller

beeline service station, fairview, utah, 1981

Neighbor's window is glowing red (no judgment).

It appears that electing a mayor of New York City is a process that takes place over the span of approximately four centuries