Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
@rustyhammer.bsky.social
Distracted.
Elder Millennial he/him
Humor, Sci-fi, General Goings-on...
[pfp: White guy in dark sweater laying prone on a beach with a white orb menacingly/oppressively laying on his back]
Elder Millennial he/him
Humor, Sci-fi, General Goings-on...
[pfp: White guy in dark sweater laying prone on a beach with a white orb menacingly/oppressively laying on his back]
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
👏SOMEONE 👏TELL👏THOSE👏FOUR 👏CALLING👏BIRDS👏THEIR👏FEATHERED👏ASSES👏COULDA👏JUST👏TEXTED👏I👏DON'T👏NEED👏TEN👏MINUTES👏OF👏SQUAWKIN'👏ON👏MY👏DAMN👏VOICEMAIL👏AND👏WHATNOT!👏
December 22, 2025 at 4:45 PM
👏SOMEONE 👏TELL👏THOSE👏FOUR 👏CALLING👏BIRDS👏THEIR👏FEATHERED👏ASSES👏COULDA👏JUST👏TEXTED👏I👏DON'T👏NEED👏TEN👏MINUTES👏OF👏SQUAWKIN'👏ON👏MY👏DAMN👏VOICEMAIL👏AND👏WHATNOT!👏
👀
An award-winning Connecticut pizzeria continues to be in expansion mode, with a location now in the works for the South Shore. on.nbcboston.com/qniRqg9
Sally's Apizza opening new location on South Shore
[This story first appeared on Boston Restaurant Talk.] An award-winning Connecticut pizzeria continues to be in expansion mode, with a location now in the works for the South Shore. According to a page within the website for the business, Sally’s Apizza is planning to open in an as-of-yet undisclosed location in Weymouth, with the page saying that it is one…
on.nbcboston.com
December 22, 2025 at 4:24 PM
👀
More Free-roaming Corruption out in the open for everyone to see….
Because they're grandfathered in under an old law, former Illinois House Speaker Michael Madigan and ex-Ald. Edward Burke can collectively pocket nearly $4 million and use it for virtually anything they want, so long as they pay income taxes.
These two crooks can still convert millions from their campaign funds into personal use if they want
chicago.suntimes.com
December 22, 2025 at 4:24 PM
More Free-roaming Corruption out in the open for everyone to see….
Refusing to eat my lima beans because photosynthesis led to aerobic metabolism which led to THIS *gestures at everything*
Oxygen feels essential to life.
But when it first spread across Earth, it nearly wiped life out.
For billions of years, organisms survived without it... until a slow chemical shift rewrote the rules.
Oxygen didn’t start life.
It almost ended it.
🧪 #SciComm
buff.ly/pn0A04F
But when it first spread across Earth, it nearly wiped life out.
For billions of years, organisms survived without it... until a slow chemical shift rewrote the rules.
Oxygen didn’t start life.
It almost ended it.
🧪 #SciComm
buff.ly/pn0A04F
That Time Oxygen Almost Killed Everything (And Made Us Possible)
How life survived a planet-changing chemical shift billions of years ago
medium.com
December 22, 2025 at 3:12 PM
Refusing to eat my lima beans because photosynthesis led to aerobic metabolism which led to THIS *gestures at everything*
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
James Talarico has been doing something really interesting: Preaching the actual teachings of Jesus and showcasing how Christian Nationalism distorts and contradicts the core tenets of Christianity. It’s a worthy, important endeavor I don’t see many politicians willing to do.
What would Jesus do if he visited the United States Senate?
December 21, 2025 at 9:33 PM
James Talarico has been doing something really interesting: Preaching the actual teachings of Jesus and showcasing how Christian Nationalism distorts and contradicts the core tenets of Christianity. It’s a worthy, important endeavor I don’t see many politicians willing to do.
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
The Lincolns have brought the coffin
December 20, 2025 at 6:16 PM
The Lincolns have brought the coffin
👀
okaay something is goin down soon….
okaay something is goin down soon….
Breaking News: Rep. Elise Stefanik of New York said she would leave Congress at the end of her term, and suspended her campaign for governor.
Elise Stefanik Drops Out of N.Y. Governor’s Race and Will Leave Congress
Ms. Stefanik, a Republican congresswoman and staunch ally of President Trump, abruptly ended her bid to unseat Gov. Kathy Hochul and said she would not seek another House term.
nyti.ms
December 19, 2025 at 9:23 PM
👀
okaay something is goin down soon….
okaay something is goin down soon….
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
"The garage?
Hey, fellas, the garage.
Ooh, la-di-da, Mr. French man."
"What do you call it?"
"A car hole."
Hey, fellas, the garage.
Ooh, la-di-da, Mr. French man."
"What do you call it?"
"A car hole."
December 19, 2025 at 7:02 PM
"The garage?
Hey, fellas, the garage.
Ooh, la-di-da, Mr. French man."
"What do you call it?"
"A car hole."
Hey, fellas, the garage.
Ooh, la-di-da, Mr. French man."
"What do you call it?"
"A car hole."
The smallest and saddest of men
Kennedy Center to be renamed 'Trump-Kennedy Center,' White House says
Kennedy Center to be renamed 'Trump-Kennedy Center,' White House says
The John F. Kennedy Memorial Center for the Performing Arts will be renamed the "Trump-Kennedy Center," White House press secretary Karoline Leavitt said.
cnb.cx
December 18, 2025 at 6:32 PM
The smallest and saddest of men
Ha!
Today’s Daily Cartoon, by Brendan Loper. #NewYorkerCartoons
Sign up for our humor newsletter to get more funny stuff directly in your inbox: newyorkermag.visitlink.me/ymKOjA
Sign up for our humor newsletter to get more funny stuff directly in your inbox: newyorkermag.visitlink.me/ymKOjA
December 16, 2025 at 8:06 PM
Ha!
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
NEW: The most symbolic thing ever just happened in Guaíba, Brazil.
December 15, 2025 at 9:15 PM
NEW: The most symbolic thing ever just happened in Guaíba, Brazil.
RIP Meathead, damn....
December 15, 2025 at 1:13 PM
RIP Meathead, damn....
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
What will historians write about this in 100 years? How would the world be different if this had gone in Gore's favor? We will never know.
25 years ago today, SCOTUS elected George W Bush president of the United States by blocking completion of a voting canvass in Florida. A subsequent canvass by the Associated Press showed that Bush's rival, Al Gore, had won the race in Florida—and thus the contest for the presidency—by 700 votes.
December 12, 2025 at 12:23 PM
What will historians write about this in 100 years? How would the world be different if this had gone in Gore's favor? We will never know.
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
Pretty soon anyone with more than 3 spices in their kitchen is gonna get deported
December 12, 2025 at 12:25 PM
Pretty soon anyone with more than 3 spices in their kitchen is gonna get deported
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
I like my neighbors
December 11, 2025 at 8:21 PM
I like my neighbors
lmaoooo
but also fuck you Noem
but also fuck you Noem
Magaziner: How many US military veterans have you deported?
Noem: We have not deported military veterans.
Magaziner: We are joined on zoom by a gentleman who is an army combat veteran who was shot twice while serving our country. You deported him to Korea.
Noem: We have not deported military veterans.
Magaziner: We are joined on zoom by a gentleman who is an army combat veteran who was shot twice while serving our country. You deported him to Korea.
December 11, 2025 at 5:58 PM
lmaoooo
but also fuck you Noem
but also fuck you Noem
Since nobody ever* finishes all 4 verses. Mass is in for a huge budget surplus....
*I'm know there's some people** that have sang the whole dang thing
**nerds
*I'm know there's some people** that have sang the whole dang thing
**nerds
In Massachusetts, you can be fined $100 for starting the National Anthem and not finishing it.
🇺🇸
🇺🇸
December 11, 2025 at 1:13 PM
Since nobody ever* finishes all 4 verses. Mass is in for a huge budget surplus....
*I'm know there's some people** that have sang the whole dang thing
**nerds
*I'm know there's some people** that have sang the whole dang thing
**nerds
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
“And what is the charge? Eating a seal? A succulent Chinese seal? GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS!”
December 6, 2025 at 12:38 PM
“And what is the charge? Eating a seal? A succulent Chinese seal? GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS!”
Would
Burger King Stuffed Steakhouse (2011-2011): A thick 1/4-pound beef patty filled with pieces of jalapeno pepper & little globules of cheddar cheese, then topped with lettuce, tomato, & a creamy poblano sauce and served on a fluffy, cornmeal-dusted bun
December 3, 2025 at 8:42 PM
Would
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
Well played.
ALERT: At US House Homeland Security Committee about violence against law enforcement, Democrats have put the January 6th plaque on a stand behind the Democratic members of panel
(House leadership has declined to hang the plaque at Capitol by mandated 2023 deadline)
(House leadership has declined to hang the plaque at Capitol by mandated 2023 deadline)
December 3, 2025 at 5:28 PM
Well played.
Zack Morris was swingin bags of coke…
Motorola's early cell phone, the DynaTAC, was $3,995 at launch in 1984. That's $12,500 today.
November 29, 2025 at 11:08 PM
Zack Morris was swingin bags of coke…
Reposted by Festive Stocking Coal Hammer (Rusted)
"The master class has always declared the wars; the subject class has always fought the battles. The master class has had all to gain and nothing to lose, while the subject class has had nothing to gain and all to lose—especially their lives."
- Eugene Debs, 1918 (this speech landed him in prison)
- Eugene Debs, 1918 (this speech landed him in prison)
November 26, 2025 at 9:30 PM
"The master class has always declared the wars; the subject class has always fought the battles. The master class has had all to gain and nothing to lose, while the subject class has had nothing to gain and all to lose—especially their lives."
- Eugene Debs, 1918 (this speech landed him in prison)
- Eugene Debs, 1918 (this speech landed him in prison)
The interview at the end of this thread taught me that the handle/stem of a pumpkin is called a peduncle and I’m really happy with this knowledge
It's squash, pumpkin, and gourd season! Test your knowledge on these colorful fall favorites with Chris Hernandez, director of the University of New Hampshire’s squash, pumpkin, and melon breeding program.
🧵 1/5
🧵 1/5
November 26, 2025 at 7:23 PM
The interview at the end of this thread taught me that the handle/stem of a pumpkin is called a peduncle and I’m really happy with this knowledge