Noah Smith
@smithnoah.bsky.social
Noah Smith is a writer or something.
I guess it makes sense, since the actors playing 15 on Stranger Things are all like 23 at this point. But it is still weird to see 13- and 14-year-old actors playing 7-year-olds. You’d think people would have realized something was up in Hawkins sooner when they saw second graders who had to shave.
December 1, 2025 at 2:23 AM
I guess it makes sense, since the actors playing 15 on Stranger Things are all like 23 at this point. But it is still weird to see 13- and 14-year-old actors playing 7-year-olds. You’d think people would have realized something was up in Hawkins sooner when they saw second graders who had to shave.
Hamlet, Act V, Scene 2
AMBASSADOR
The ears are senseless that should give us hearing
To tell him his commandment is fulfilled,
That Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead.
HORATIO: That’s too bad, I guess.
AMBASSADOR: Also, Tom Stoppard has died.
HORATIO: Oh no! Dear god, no! Fuck.
AMBASSADOR
The ears are senseless that should give us hearing
To tell him his commandment is fulfilled,
That Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead.
HORATIO: That’s too bad, I guess.
AMBASSADOR: Also, Tom Stoppard has died.
HORATIO: Oh no! Dear god, no! Fuck.
November 29, 2025 at 6:07 PM
Hamlet, Act V, Scene 2
AMBASSADOR
The ears are senseless that should give us hearing
To tell him his commandment is fulfilled,
That Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead.
HORATIO: That’s too bad, I guess.
AMBASSADOR: Also, Tom Stoppard has died.
HORATIO: Oh no! Dear god, no! Fuck.
AMBASSADOR
The ears are senseless that should give us hearing
To tell him his commandment is fulfilled,
That Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead.
HORATIO: That’s too bad, I guess.
AMBASSADOR: Also, Tom Stoppard has died.
HORATIO: Oh no! Dear god, no! Fuck.
We didn’t call them hoodies in the 80s, did we? #strangerthings #season5episode2
November 29, 2025 at 1:47 AM
We didn’t call them hoodies in the 80s, did we? #strangerthings #season5episode2
“You’ll be visited by three spirits.”
The three spirits:
The three spirits:
November 28, 2025 at 6:00 PM
“You’ll be visited by three spirits.”
The three spirits:
The three spirits:
If I’m spending $100k on a personal vehicle it better come with 4 insane boys, age 17-21.
November 28, 2025 at 1:55 PM
If I’m spending $100k on a personal vehicle it better come with 4 insane boys, age 17-21.
Reposted by Noah Smith
If I’m spending $100k on a personal vehicle, it should be bigger on the inside and travel through time.
November 28, 2025 at 3:23 AM
If I’m spending $100k on a personal vehicle, it should be bigger on the inside and travel through time.
Reposted by Noah Smith
*Demogorgon grabs*
SANTA I LOVE YOU
*is dragged into the Upside Down playing saxophone*
SANTA I LOVE YOU
*is dragged into the Upside Down playing saxophone*
November 27, 2025 at 5:02 PM
*Demogorgon grabs*
SANTA I LOVE YOU
*is dragged into the Upside Down playing saxophone*
SANTA I LOVE YOU
*is dragged into the Upside Down playing saxophone*
Reposted by Noah Smith
Was not expecting this blatant xenophobia on my tv first thing in the morning...
November 27, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Was not expecting this blatant xenophobia on my tv first thing in the morning...
Reposted by Noah Smith
MY LOVE OF SANTA HAS GIVEN ME SAXOPHONE POWERS
*plays unrelated notes*
*plays unrelated notes*
November 27, 2025 at 4:30 PM
MY LOVE OF SANTA HAS GIVEN ME SAXOPHONE POWERS
*plays unrelated notes*
*plays unrelated notes*
Reposted by Noah Smith
*bikes through Demon Hunters on bike with massive cheese grater*
November 27, 2025 at 4:06 PM
*bikes through Demon Hunters on bike with massive cheese grater*
Reposted by Noah Smith
*gently puts a Stranger Things kid into a sleeper hold*
*quietly takes bike*
*quietly takes bike*
November 27, 2025 at 3:30 PM
*gently puts a Stranger Things kid into a sleeper hold*
*quietly takes bike*
*quietly takes bike*
Reposted by Noah Smith
it’s crazy that for the rest of my life I’m going to think about this man every single thanksgiving
a man wearing glasses and a flat cap says " bring out the girls "
ALT: a man wearing glasses and a flat cap says " bring out the girls "
media.tenor.com
November 27, 2025 at 1:41 PM
it’s crazy that for the rest of my life I’m going to think about this man every single thanksgiving
Parade Time. Always weird to see which stars you thought were still kind of a big deal are now parade nostalgia acts. Not surprised to see Debbie Gibson and Foreigner on the list but Jewel and Busta Rhymes? Hitting me right in the I’m-almost-50. #macysparade #macysthanksgivingdayparade
November 27, 2025 at 1:39 PM
Parade Time. Always weird to see which stars you thought were still kind of a big deal are now parade nostalgia acts. Not surprised to see Debbie Gibson and Foreigner on the list but Jewel and Busta Rhymes? Hitting me right in the I’m-almost-50. #macysparade #macysthanksgivingdayparade
I only have one pair of Thanksgiving-themed socks. I wore them on Sunday thinking I would have time to wash them before tomorrow. Guess I flew too close to the sun.
November 26, 2025 at 10:00 PM
I only have one pair of Thanksgiving-themed socks. I wore them on Sunday thinking I would have time to wash them before tomorrow. Guess I flew too close to the sun.
Is this asshole gonna ruin my favorite place to buy novelty T-shirts? www.teepublic.com
November 26, 2025 at 3:02 PM
Is this asshole gonna ruin my favorite place to buy novelty T-shirts? www.teepublic.com
They should do it and make the villain a blatant Trump stand-in and the character should be incredibly evil and stupid and constantly embarrassing himself and at the the end of the movie he should die in the most painful, humiliating way possible. We need that.
www.huffpost.com/entry/rush-h...
www.huffpost.com/entry/rush-h...
Trump Privately Pushed For 'Rush Hour' Revival: Report
The revival will star its original cast, Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker.
www.huffpost.com
November 26, 2025 at 12:22 AM
They should do it and make the villain a blatant Trump stand-in and the character should be incredibly evil and stupid and constantly embarrassing himself and at the the end of the movie he should die in the most painful, humiliating way possible. We need that.
www.huffpost.com/entry/rush-h...
www.huffpost.com/entry/rush-h...
Tom Hanks branded makeshift prison weapons called Hanks Shanks.
Tom Hanks branded shapewear called Hanks Spanks
Tom Hanks branded tank tops called Hanks Tanks
November 25, 2025 at 9:34 PM
Tom Hanks branded makeshift prison weapons called Hanks Shanks.
This is the actual insufferable Thanksgiving argument that pops up every time this year. What? You think turkey is dry? You don’t like certain kinds of pie? Tell me more, Professor Fascinating!
the food you like? it's bad. the food *i* like? good. checkmate, losers
November 25, 2025 at 9:13 PM
This is the actual insufferable Thanksgiving argument that pops up every time this year. What? You think turkey is dry? You don’t like certain kinds of pie? Tell me more, Professor Fascinating!
Reposted by Noah Smith
currently Thanksgiving shopping and way out of my depth
November 25, 2025 at 8:20 PM
currently Thanksgiving shopping and way out of my depth
I’ve always found “take a shit “odd. Because you’re not taking something. You’re leaving something behind.
Motion to replace the phrase "take a shower" with "have a shower." I'm about to have a shower.
November 25, 2025 at 3:54 PM
I’ve always found “take a shit “odd. Because you’re not taking something. You’re leaving something behind.
Just learned that today is Joey Chestnut’s birthday, which means that his birthday falls on Thanksgiving one or twice a decade.
I’m guessing things get pretty crazy when that happens.
I’m guessing things get pretty crazy when that happens.
November 25, 2025 at 3:39 PM
Just learned that today is Joey Chestnut’s birthday, which means that his birthday falls on Thanksgiving one or twice a decade.
I’m guessing things get pretty crazy when that happens.
I’m guessing things get pretty crazy when that happens.
The only surviving Gilligan’s Island cast member is Ginger, but all three actresses who played Ginger in live action are still alive.
November 25, 2025 at 2:33 AM
The only surviving Gilligan’s Island cast member is Ginger, but all three actresses who played Ginger in live action are still alive.
There must be some reason …
November 24, 2025 at 1:31 PM
There must be some reason …
I learned recently that, when she was growing up, my wife’s family didn’t usually have loaves of bread in the house. It was just my wife and her mother. They didn’t have toast at breakfast, or pack sandwiches to go to school or work, so they didn’t really need it. But that still seems bizarre to me.
My husband has never had a grilled cheese or a pb&j.
Hey @gailsimone.bsky.social what's your favorite kind of grilled cheese?
Mine is quesadilla.
Mine is quesadilla.
November 23, 2025 at 9:21 PM
I learned recently that, when she was growing up, my wife’s family didn’t usually have loaves of bread in the house. It was just my wife and her mother. They didn’t have toast at breakfast, or pack sandwiches to go to school or work, so they didn’t really need it. But that still seems bizarre to me.
A movie that takes place where you're from
November 23, 2025 at 8:54 PM
A movie that takes place where you're from