Theodore Hill (he/him)
@probablyharmless.bsky.social
Writer of (mostly) horror. Also trans, queer, polyam, and Jewish. theodorehill.weebly.com for contact info, publication credits, and super strange testimonials. Co-Editor @dielaughingmag.bsky.social / Wario of @cassandradaucus.bsky.social
Just finished DS9 s6e13 and I'm printing out the script to this episode and encasing it in resin for the next time someone around my age says sci fi wasn't woke when they were a kid so I have something with which to beat them to death.
January 12, 2026 at 6:30 PM
Just finished DS9 s6e13 and I'm printing out the script to this episode and encasing it in resin for the next time someone around my age says sci fi wasn't woke when they were a kid so I have something with which to beat them to death.
Life update for those interested: though things have settled down somewhat as far as immediate conflict, I'm still leaving asap. It's a pattern of behavior that I can't be part of. If she's gonna threaten to disown me every time I try to be vulnerable that's not ok even if she's sorry for now. (1/3)
January 11, 2026 at 6:59 PM
Life update for those interested: though things have settled down somewhat as far as immediate conflict, I'm still leaving asap. It's a pattern of behavior that I can't be part of. If she's gonna threaten to disown me every time I try to be vulnerable that's not ok even if she's sorry for now. (1/3)
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
holy fuck it’s real
January 11, 2026 at 3:24 AM
holy fuck it’s real
Very important thread here
i admit that i am having a hard time trying to advocate for people with severe mental illness rn, bc SMI makes you SO vulnerable to state and police violence; we are unseen victims of institutional brutality, absolutely. we are not remembered, or honored. but there are no hashtags, calls to action
January 11, 2026 at 3:13 AM
Very important thread here
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
ICE is NOT psychotic. they are hateful, fascist, evil, horrible, motherfuckers. but they are not /psychotic/. people who are actually psychotic., i.e. lost in a world of hallucination and delusion and confusion, are some of the MOST at risk of being murdered by law enforcement
January 11, 2026 at 2:54 AM
ICE is NOT psychotic. they are hateful, fascist, evil, horrible, motherfuckers. but they are not /psychotic/. people who are actually psychotic., i.e. lost in a world of hallucination and delusion and confusion, are some of the MOST at risk of being murdered by law enforcement
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
ken did a really great thread here that nicely articulates why i block doomers.
the only thing i’ll add is this: doomerism is a form of voter suppression. saying shit like “there won’t be elections” is saying there’s no point in fighting. it’s demotivating. fuck that.
the only thing i’ll add is this: doomerism is a form of voter suppression. saying shit like “there won’t be elections” is saying there’s no point in fighting. it’s demotivating. fuck that.
This kind of thing does point out a real ethical dilemma: block or mute?
January 10, 2026 at 6:48 PM
ken did a really great thread here that nicely articulates why i block doomers.
the only thing i’ll add is this: doomerism is a form of voter suppression. saying shit like “there won’t be elections” is saying there’s no point in fighting. it’s demotivating. fuck that.
the only thing i’ll add is this: doomerism is a form of voter suppression. saying shit like “there won’t be elections” is saying there’s no point in fighting. it’s demotivating. fuck that.
Today I went to the art museum and in this age of "AI" and other forms of artistic hopelessness I cannot recommend this activity highly enough. I feel inspired, rejuvenated, sated.
Lots of them have free days and many libraries offer passes. It doesn't have to be expensive. Go to the art museum!!
Lots of them have free days and many libraries offer passes. It doesn't have to be expensive. Go to the art museum!!
January 11, 2026 at 1:28 AM
Today I went to the art museum and in this age of "AI" and other forms of artistic hopelessness I cannot recommend this activity highly enough. I feel inspired, rejuvenated, sated.
Lots of them have free days and many libraries offer passes. It doesn't have to be expensive. Go to the art museum!!
Lots of them have free days and many libraries offer passes. It doesn't have to be expensive. Go to the art museum!!
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
Another delightful thing that happened last night at karaoke: I was talking about what happened with my mom and how karaoke nights were like my one chance a week to feel like a guy and one of my friends (kind of drunk) decided it was time for a gender affirming dance lesson (he taught me to skank).
January 8, 2026 at 11:29 PM
Another delightful thing that happened last night at karaoke: I was talking about what happened with my mom and how karaoke nights were like my one chance a week to feel like a guy and one of my friends (kind of drunk) decided it was time for a gender affirming dance lesson (he taught me to skank).
At karaoke and I keep cracking jokes that make the karaoke host double over laughing her ass off and honestly like forget alcohol, this is the only drug I need.
January 8, 2026 at 7:51 AM
At karaoke and I keep cracking jokes that make the karaoke host double over laughing her ass off and honestly like forget alcohol, this is the only drug I need.
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
My newest creation is Amelia the Lovely and the Terrible. I designed and hand-sewed her, and I hand-embroidered all her flowers and markings. She is lovely to good people and terrible to bad ones. She enjoys coming up with new blessings, curses, and cookie recipes.
jeremycreature.bigcartel.com
jeremycreature.bigcartel.com
January 8, 2026 at 12:48 AM
My newest creation is Amelia the Lovely and the Terrible. I designed and hand-sewed her, and I hand-embroidered all her flowers and markings. She is lovely to good people and terrible to bad ones. She enjoys coming up with new blessings, curses, and cookie recipes.
jeremycreature.bigcartel.com
jeremycreature.bigcartel.com
So today has been bad in so many ways, but I needed help this morning and friends, colleagues, and strangers delivered far more than I could have imagined. I'm overwhelmed, and grateful, and more than a little weepy. I'm gonna be able to make this trip, and things are going to be okay.
January 8, 2026 at 2:15 AM
So today has been bad in so many ways, but I needed help this morning and friends, colleagues, and strangers delivered far more than I could have imagined. I'm overwhelmed, and grateful, and more than a little weepy. I'm gonna be able to make this trip, and things are going to be okay.
Lol. Lmao, even.
(This is very not happening. Maybe in 2030 I'll give it another shot.)
(This is very not happening. Maybe in 2030 I'll give it another shot.)
So I am going to try to write a short story every week this year. I'm pinning this to my profile for accountability and will hopefully thread all the stories as I go. Wish me luck!
January 7, 2026 at 10:43 PM
Lol. Lmao, even.
(This is very not happening. Maybe in 2030 I'll give it another shot.)
(This is very not happening. Maybe in 2030 I'll give it another shot.)
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
Hi hey my new book comes out on Jan 20, and she's real pretty, and there's a giveaway of ten of these shiny sprayed hardcovers on GR, otherwise you can ask your local bookstore for one and that would mean the world to me!
www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Ni...
www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Ni...
January 7, 2026 at 4:09 PM
Hi hey my new book comes out on Jan 20, and she's real pretty, and there's a giveaway of ten of these shiny sprayed hardcovers on GR, otherwise you can ask your local bookstore for one and that would mean the world to me!
www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Ni...
www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Ni...
Okay so I am verklempt, I have already reached OVER the $500 I needed to feel secure about the car registration, and I am SO SO SO GRATEFUL. I'm leaving the post up because I still have to like...feed myself, but the emergency no longer feels emergent, and I appreciate you all so, so so much.
So living with my parents abruptly became unsafe (mentally/emotionally) and I'm leaving ASAP. I have somewhere to go, but it's out of state. I'm packing now but I have to register my car before I go and that's $500. Anything helps. 🫀
Venmo: probablyharmless
PayPal: theohillwriter at gmail
Venmo: probablyharmless
PayPal: theohillwriter at gmail
January 7, 2026 at 6:19 PM
Okay so I am verklempt, I have already reached OVER the $500 I needed to feel secure about the car registration, and I am SO SO SO GRATEFUL. I'm leaving the post up because I still have to like...feed myself, but the emergency no longer feels emergent, and I appreciate you all so, so so much.
So living with my parents abruptly became unsafe (mentally/emotionally) and I'm leaving ASAP. I have somewhere to go, but it's out of state. I'm packing now but I have to register my car before I go and that's $500. Anything helps. 🫀
Venmo: probablyharmless
PayPal: theohillwriter at gmail
Venmo: probablyharmless
PayPal: theohillwriter at gmail
January 7, 2026 at 5:27 PM
So living with my parents abruptly became unsafe (mentally/emotionally) and I'm leaving ASAP. I have somewhere to go, but it's out of state. I'm packing now but I have to register my car before I go and that's $500. Anything helps. 🫀
Venmo: probablyharmless
PayPal: theohillwriter at gmail
Venmo: probablyharmless
PayPal: theohillwriter at gmail
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
creepy television interview dude:
do you have a steady boyfriend? what kind of fella would you like?
jodie foster, lesbian icon:
😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏
do you have a steady boyfriend? what kind of fella would you like?
jodie foster, lesbian icon:
😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏
March 16, 2025 at 3:11 PM
creepy television interview dude:
do you have a steady boyfriend? what kind of fella would you like?
jodie foster, lesbian icon:
😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏
do you have a steady boyfriend? what kind of fella would you like?
jodie foster, lesbian icon:
😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
the ability to tell a great story about a normal or mundane event
anyone can grab the room by like idk having witnessed a diamond heist and just telling us about it. you get more points if you have us rolling on the floor over, like, the haunted office photocopier or your kid’s weirdest questions
anyone can grab the room by like idk having witnessed a diamond heist and just telling us about it. you get more points if you have us rolling on the floor over, like, the haunted office photocopier or your kid’s weirdest questions
17. What is a trait that isn't visible that makes someone memorable?
January 6, 2026 at 5:03 AM
the ability to tell a great story about a normal or mundane event
anyone can grab the room by like idk having witnessed a diamond heist and just telling us about it. you get more points if you have us rolling on the floor over, like, the haunted office photocopier or your kid’s weirdest questions
anyone can grab the room by like idk having witnessed a diamond heist and just telling us about it. you get more points if you have us rolling on the floor over, like, the haunted office photocopier or your kid’s weirdest questions
Suddenly somehow went from hopeless to hopeful in the span of like 15 seconds just now. (On a personal level. I think some stuff might work out.)
January 6, 2026 at 3:33 AM
Suddenly somehow went from hopeless to hopeful in the span of like 15 seconds just now. (On a personal level. I think some stuff might work out.)
I urgently need like at least five things from this shop.
I'm an untrained artist designing merch that draws on niche pop culture mashups for queer pride, nerd humor, and agitprop for a better world being possible. This thread includes a sampling of my work, which you can find on stickers and shirts, pins, prints, and patches at willburrows.art/shop
January 6, 2026 at 3:10 AM
I urgently need like at least five things from this shop.
Excuse me, "powerful blue horse" has a name.
If you won't listen to us, maybe you'll listen to this horse.
January 5, 2026 at 10:25 PM
Excuse me, "powerful blue horse" has a name.
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
Ever relevant, this poem by Mary Oliver, especially today.
January 3, 2026 at 2:02 PM
Ever relevant, this poem by Mary Oliver, especially today.
Reposted by Theodore Hill (he/him)
Porn and erotica are important and societally valuable forms of speech, and the defense of them, in the face of state and church attempts at repression, is a necessary political act.
January 4, 2026 at 6:58 PM
Porn and erotica are important and societally valuable forms of speech, and the defense of them, in the face of state and church attempts at repression, is a necessary political act.