Mr John Robertson
@robbotron.bsky.social
Comic/Cult Leader/THE DARK ROOM 🍍
London. Work: [email protected] NEXT TOUR STOPS: We start up again in 2026! 20+ tour dates and live shows already announced: thejohnrobertson.com/livedates
London. Work: [email protected] NEXT TOUR STOPS: We start up again in 2026! 20+ tour dates and live shows already announced: thejohnrobertson.com/livedates
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
Today I learned “Norwegian Christian laws forbade citizens from conversing with and interacting with trolls, and in documents dating from 1274 to 1781, doing so would result in severe punishment” (source: Wikipedia), and I kinda think many people nowadays would be better off if this law was revived
January 24, 2026 at 7:31 AM
Today I learned “Norwegian Christian laws forbade citizens from conversing with and interacting with trolls, and in documents dating from 1274 to 1781, doing so would result in severe punishment” (source: Wikipedia), and I kinda think many people nowadays would be better off if this law was revived
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
This week, an X user created an AI video of me being chloroformed and prepared for rape.
Victims are told it's not real and they're getting offended for no reason.
But nudification tools are weapons of sexual assault, and the harm they cause is real 👇
jessasato.substack.com/p/ai-nudific...
Victims are told it's not real and they're getting offended for no reason.
But nudification tools are weapons of sexual assault, and the harm they cause is real 👇
jessasato.substack.com/p/ai-nudific...
AI nudification: the latest weapon of violence against women and girls
In Julie Burchill’s recent article in the Spectator, Does it really matter if Grok undresses us all?, she makes the argument that those who, like me, have repeatedly had their clothes removed by socia...
jessasato.substack.com
January 23, 2026 at 11:21 AM
This week, an X user created an AI video of me being chloroformed and prepared for rape.
Victims are told it's not real and they're getting offended for no reason.
But nudification tools are weapons of sexual assault, and the harm they cause is real 👇
jessasato.substack.com/p/ai-nudific...
Victims are told it's not real and they're getting offended for no reason.
But nudification tools are weapons of sexual assault, and the harm they cause is real 👇
jessasato.substack.com/p/ai-nudific...
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
Leicester Comedy Festival starts soon.
Say, why not get tickets www.comedy-festival.co.uk/festival-eve... for e.g. @drucripps.bsky.social, @adelecliff.bsky.social, @frizfrizzle.bsky.social, @robbotron.bsky.social, @rialina.com, Sophie Duker, @aniamagliano.bsky.social, @vanderlaugh.bsky.social...
Say, why not get tickets www.comedy-festival.co.uk/festival-eve... for e.g. @drucripps.bsky.social, @adelecliff.bsky.social, @frizfrizzle.bsky.social, @robbotron.bsky.social, @rialina.com, Sophie Duker, @aniamagliano.bsky.social, @vanderlaugh.bsky.social...
January 23, 2026 at 4:53 PM
Leicester Comedy Festival starts soon.
Say, why not get tickets www.comedy-festival.co.uk/festival-eve... for e.g. @drucripps.bsky.social, @adelecliff.bsky.social, @frizfrizzle.bsky.social, @robbotron.bsky.social, @rialina.com, Sophie Duker, @aniamagliano.bsky.social, @vanderlaugh.bsky.social...
Say, why not get tickets www.comedy-festival.co.uk/festival-eve... for e.g. @drucripps.bsky.social, @adelecliff.bsky.social, @frizfrizzle.bsky.social, @robbotron.bsky.social, @rialina.com, Sophie Duker, @aniamagliano.bsky.social, @vanderlaugh.bsky.social...
I love The Traitors - the personal trainer who always says he’s a personal trainer, the moustache guy who’s constantly touching his face, and of course James, the dumbest motherfucker alive
January 22, 2026 at 8:39 PM
I love The Traitors - the personal trainer who always says he’s a personal trainer, the moustache guy who’s constantly touching his face, and of course James, the dumbest motherfucker alive
March 19th: THE DARK ROOM hits Wakefield Exchange, and look who’s there - it’s goddamn JOHN ROMERO (Doom, Wolfenstein, Quake) and BAFTA-winner BRENDA ROMERO!
Pop on down for an especially doomed evening! Get the chainsaw! We’re going to hell!
www.wxwakefield.co.uk/Whats-On/Det...
Pop on down for an especially doomed evening! Get the chainsaw! We’re going to hell!
www.wxwakefield.co.uk/Whats-On/Det...
January 20, 2026 at 3:04 PM
March 19th: THE DARK ROOM hits Wakefield Exchange, and look who’s there - it’s goddamn JOHN ROMERO (Doom, Wolfenstein, Quake) and BAFTA-winner BRENDA ROMERO!
Pop on down for an especially doomed evening! Get the chainsaw! We’re going to hell!
www.wxwakefield.co.uk/Whats-On/Det...
Pop on down for an especially doomed evening! Get the chainsaw! We’re going to hell!
www.wxwakefield.co.uk/Whats-On/Det...
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
Lord Haw Haws laud war whores.
January 19, 2026 at 4:19 PM
Lord Haw Haws laud war whores.
Three weeks to go and 1/3 seats already sold for THE DARK ROOM at Leicester Comedy Festival Feb 6th!
Thank you, folks!
🍍🍍💀
Grab yours, Darrens! events.comedy-festival.co.uk/events/john-...
Thank you, folks!
🍍🍍💀
Grab yours, Darrens! events.comedy-festival.co.uk/events/john-...
January 19, 2026 at 2:43 PM
Three weeks to go and 1/3 seats already sold for THE DARK ROOM at Leicester Comedy Festival Feb 6th!
Thank you, folks!
🍍🍍💀
Grab yours, Darrens! events.comedy-festival.co.uk/events/john-...
Thank you, folks!
🍍🍍💀
Grab yours, Darrens! events.comedy-festival.co.uk/events/john-...
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
This map exposes the Greenland lie.
The US used to have a massive military footprint here.
Today, they operate just ONE base.
If Trump were actually worried about Russian vessels, he would simply open more bases, which Denmark allows
The US used to have a massive military footprint here.
Today, they operate just ONE base.
If Trump were actually worried about Russian vessels, he would simply open more bases, which Denmark allows
January 17, 2026 at 2:27 PM
This map exposes the Greenland lie.
The US used to have a massive military footprint here.
Today, they operate just ONE base.
If Trump were actually worried about Russian vessels, he would simply open more bases, which Denmark allows
The US used to have a massive military footprint here.
Today, they operate just ONE base.
If Trump were actually worried about Russian vessels, he would simply open more bases, which Denmark allows
World News:
🇺🇸 Please stop calling our Gestapo the Gestapo, they think they’re the SS
🇷🇺 Thank you, America, for keeping us out of the news
🇨🇳 [redacted]
🇬🇱 Oh what is this shit.
🇺🇸 Please stop calling our Gestapo the Gestapo, they think they’re the SS
🇷🇺 Thank you, America, for keeping us out of the news
🇨🇳 [redacted]
🇬🇱 Oh what is this shit.
January 15, 2026 at 3:27 PM
World News:
🇺🇸 Please stop calling our Gestapo the Gestapo, they think they’re the SS
🇷🇺 Thank you, America, for keeping us out of the news
🇨🇳 [redacted]
🇬🇱 Oh what is this shit.
🇺🇸 Please stop calling our Gestapo the Gestapo, they think they’re the SS
🇷🇺 Thank you, America, for keeping us out of the news
🇨🇳 [redacted]
🇬🇱 Oh what is this shit.
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
wikipedia turns 25 today! the last unenshittified major website! backbone of online info! triumph of humanity! powered by urge of unpaid randos to correct each other! somehow mostly reliable! "good thing wikipedia works in practice, because it sure doesn't work in theory" - old wiki adage
January 15, 2026 at 1:47 PM
wikipedia turns 25 today! the last unenshittified major website! backbone of online info! triumph of humanity! powered by urge of unpaid randos to correct each other! somehow mostly reliable! "good thing wikipedia works in practice, because it sure doesn't work in theory" - old wiki adage
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
Holy crap i didn't realise @robbotron.bsky.social was on an episode of Tables Lists and Chairs 😁
January 15, 2026 at 2:29 PM
Holy crap i didn't realise @robbotron.bsky.social was on an episode of Tables Lists and Chairs 😁
Today I learned it’s pronounced “Dilbert” like “Ernie and Bert”
And not “Dil-bear” like, “I’ve just put a dildo in a bear”.
And not “Dil-bear” like, “I’ve just put a dildo in a bear”.
January 14, 2026 at 1:55 PM
Today I learned it’s pronounced “Dilbert” like “Ernie and Bert”
And not “Dil-bear” like, “I’ve just put a dildo in a bear”.
And not “Dil-bear” like, “I’ve just put a dildo in a bear”.
A real pleasure to meet the gang of influencers who ran up to my pals at 11pm yesterday screaming “We’ll pay you to let us give you a haircut”.
1. Dashing out of the shadows mentioning blades is a bad idea.
2. Knife crime rates in London are down, glad to hear scissoring is on the rise.
1. Dashing out of the shadows mentioning blades is a bad idea.
2. Knife crime rates in London are down, glad to hear scissoring is on the rise.
January 14, 2026 at 3:44 AM
A real pleasure to meet the gang of influencers who ran up to my pals at 11pm yesterday screaming “We’ll pay you to let us give you a haircut”.
1. Dashing out of the shadows mentioning blades is a bad idea.
2. Knife crime rates in London are down, glad to hear scissoring is on the rise.
1. Dashing out of the shadows mentioning blades is a bad idea.
2. Knife crime rates in London are down, glad to hear scissoring is on the rise.
I’m not saying that Gary Larson did it, but the imprints in Scott Adams back sure look a lot like cow tools
January 13, 2026 at 9:27 PM
I’m not saying that Gary Larson did it, but the imprints in Scott Adams back sure look a lot like cow tools
FIRE
I got bored so made an edit of @robbotron.bsky.social facing off with the fire alarm at the Frog and Bucket Comedy Club in Manchester.
#ManVsFireAlarm
#ToiletVape
#TheFireiesAreTheTrueHeroes
#ManVsFireAlarm
#ToiletVape
#TheFireiesAreTheTrueHeroes
John Robertson vs Fire Alarm @robbotrontwitchtakes on the fire alarm at #TheFrogAndBucketManchester comedy club!
TikTok video by everyfairydies4
www.tiktok.com
January 13, 2026 at 3:24 PM
FIRE
Quick glance at the news got me real nostalgic for the pandemic.
January 12, 2026 at 10:08 AM
Quick glance at the news got me real nostalgic for the pandemic.
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
*posting on twitter* oh ho, I’ve made a wry observation. Better make sure a bunch of pedophiles see it
January 10, 2026 at 10:46 PM
*posting on twitter* oh ho, I’ve made a wry observation. Better make sure a bunch of pedophiles see it
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
honk honk, that's the sound of the geese
January 11, 2026 at 11:42 PM
honk honk, that's the sound of the geese
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
Years ago my friend Dave’s then-four-year-old son walked into a room, looked at Dave, and said, “Well, well, well. If it isn’t Mr. Daddy.”
January 8, 2026 at 2:46 AM
Years ago my friend Dave’s then-four-year-old son walked into a room, looked at Dave, and said, “Well, well, well. If it isn’t Mr. Daddy.”
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
The shooting is shocking enough but the government's response is off the charts when you consider that this incident is forensically documented on video.
January 8, 2026 at 12:38 PM
The shooting is shocking enough but the government's response is off the charts when you consider that this incident is forensically documented on video.
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
We have DOUBLE the @robbotron.bsky.social acts comfirmed at EPIC.LAN events in 2026, but with a twist...
He's coming for you at:
🍍EPIC48 (July) - The Dark Room
🎤EPIC49 (October) - Stand-Up
Plenty more to come from EPIC.LAN this year, get yourselves there Darrens👆
He's coming for you at:
🍍EPIC48 (July) - The Dark Room
🎤EPIC49 (October) - Stand-Up
Plenty more to come from EPIC.LAN this year, get yourselves there Darrens👆
January 8, 2026 at 10:20 AM
We have DOUBLE the @robbotron.bsky.social acts comfirmed at EPIC.LAN events in 2026, but with a twist...
He's coming for you at:
🍍EPIC48 (July) - The Dark Room
🎤EPIC49 (October) - Stand-Up
Plenty more to come from EPIC.LAN this year, get yourselves there Darrens👆
He's coming for you at:
🍍EPIC48 (July) - The Dark Room
🎤EPIC49 (October) - Stand-Up
Plenty more to come from EPIC.LAN this year, get yourselves there Darrens👆
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
I'm so delighted that I complied with the Online Safety Act, blocking an accessibility feature on my site from UK users to 'protect the children' while Elon Musk's site can just generate CSAM with total impunity.
January 7, 2026 at 10:04 AM
I'm so delighted that I complied with the Online Safety Act, blocking an accessibility feature on my site from UK users to 'protect the children' while Elon Musk's site can just generate CSAM with total impunity.
Hiyao Miyazaki is 85 years old, which means he’ll come out of retirement at least twice more before he dies.
January 6, 2026 at 7:01 PM
Hiyao Miyazaki is 85 years old, which means he’ll come out of retirement at least twice more before he dies.
Reposted by Mr John Robertson
TONIGHT! @robbotron.bsky.social brings us cult classic The Dark Room, there's support from Ayo Adenekan, Alex Mitchell, and Jo Owen, AND we've got our own cult hero @tobyhadoke.bsky.social keeping it all together www.wegottickets.com/xsmalarkey
January 6, 2026 at 5:51 PM
TONIGHT! @robbotron.bsky.social brings us cult classic The Dark Room, there's support from Ayo Adenekan, Alex Mitchell, and Jo Owen, AND we've got our own cult hero @tobyhadoke.bsky.social keeping it all together www.wegottickets.com/xsmalarkey