Nick (derogatory) ✨
@slothropsmap.bsky.social
Yinzer ambassador to the west coast • Moo Deng’s spiritual successor • Tallest Italian with type 2 trigeminal neuralgia • What you fail to see, Mr Pope
Don't fuck with me. I'll spend another three hours in Excel. I don't care.
Don't fuck with me. I'll spend another three hours in Excel. I don't care.
Pinned
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
[rereading it to correct initial impression that he laid the eggs ON Kimmel] no no this is still problematical no matter how the sentence is written
Picturing this guy's now on the run from the same feds who hunted down Alf
November 27, 2025 at 4:57 AM
[rereading it to correct initial impression that he laid the eggs ON Kimmel] no no this is still problematical no matter how the sentence is written
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
We have Thanksgiving at 1pm because my inlaws are insane, so we always have the "what do we have for dinner on THANKSGIVING" conversation.
The tradition has become there's one Chinese restaurant that stays open until 9pm. So...
The tradition has become there's one Chinese restaurant that stays open until 9pm. So...
Tell me something that’s Thanksgiving tradition in your family that would be super weird to folks on the outside.
November 26, 2025 at 11:19 PM
We have Thanksgiving at 1pm because my inlaws are insane, so we always have the "what do we have for dinner on THANKSGIVING" conversation.
The tradition has become there's one Chinese restaurant that stays open until 9pm. So...
The tradition has become there's one Chinese restaurant that stays open until 9pm. So...
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
As the youngest of 9. 7 girls 2 boys. After eating the turkey and clean the kitchen, we girls and mom would get our jars of pennies and play penny poker. All night thursday, sleep a little on Friday then again until we went home on Sunday. Jokes, stories, food, laughter for 3 days. I miss this.
November 26, 2025 at 11:26 PM
As the youngest of 9. 7 girls 2 boys. After eating the turkey and clean the kitchen, we girls and mom would get our jars of pennies and play penny poker. All night thursday, sleep a little on Friday then again until we went home on Sunday. Jokes, stories, food, laughter for 3 days. I miss this.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
important to have at least a couple good friends who care enough to say something like “this substack makes you look crazy”
November 26, 2025 at 11:14 PM
important to have at least a couple good friends who care enough to say something like “this substack makes you look crazy”
There are maybe twenty people alive whose personal capers can justify this level of intrigue, and Olivia Nuzzi is not one of them.
November 26, 2025 at 11:08 PM
There are maybe twenty people alive whose personal capers can justify this level of intrigue, and Olivia Nuzzi is not one of them.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
the requirement is, of course, “be white” amp.miamiherald.com/news/nation-...
Trump says Haiti no longer meets requirements for TPS. Haitians have to leave
The Department of Homeland Security said TPS for Haiti ends Feb. 3, 2026, affecting over half a million people who may face return to gang-controlled Port-au-Prince.
amp.miamiherald.com
November 26, 2025 at 10:43 PM
the requirement is, of course, “be white” amp.miamiherald.com/news/nation-...
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
the poverty line is $130k. not that I would know. my butler tells me that bottle service is getting expensive
November 26, 2025 at 3:58 PM
the poverty line is $130k. not that I would know. my butler tells me that bottle service is getting expensive
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
We listen to all 18 minutes and 34 seconds of "Alice's Restaurant Massacree" yearly, to ward off the draft.
November 26, 2025 at 10:48 PM
We listen to all 18 minutes and 34 seconds of "Alice's Restaurant Massacree" yearly, to ward off the draft.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
Imagine how much more compelling this whole affair would be were we talking about Ryan Pizza and Olivia Gnocchi.
November 24, 2025 at 1:22 AM
Imagine how much more compelling this whole affair would be were we talking about Ryan Pizza and Olivia Gnocchi.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
Autocorrect just changed “Ryan Lizza” to “Ryan Pizza,” which means for the briefest of moments, the man became interesting to me.
November 24, 2025 at 1:18 AM
Autocorrect just changed “Ryan Lizza” to “Ryan Pizza,” which means for the briefest of moments, the man became interesting to me.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
My father, every year as he finished carving the turkey, while holding up what he claimed was the turkey's butt:
"Who wants the part that goes over the fence last?"
Robust evidence of amusement was mandatory.
"Who wants the part that goes over the fence last?"
Robust evidence of amusement was mandatory.
November 26, 2025 at 10:31 PM
My father, every year as he finished carving the turkey, while holding up what he claimed was the turkey's butt:
"Who wants the part that goes over the fence last?"
Robust evidence of amusement was mandatory.
"Who wants the part that goes over the fence last?"
Robust evidence of amusement was mandatory.
Is this man naked?
November 26, 2025 at 10:27 PM
Is this man naked?
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
It's just my son & me. When he was young we were very poor so we did nothing but go to starbucks as a treat at 7 am, then for lunch & dinner eat deli turkey & pumpkin pie. Then we graduated to takeout barbecue for about 5 years. Now we go to a nice restaurant for Thanksgiving.
Tell me something that’s Thanksgiving tradition in your family that would be super weird to folks on the outside.
November 26, 2025 at 10:23 PM
It's just my son & me. When he was young we were very poor so we did nothing but go to starbucks as a treat at 7 am, then for lunch & dinner eat deli turkey & pumpkin pie. Then we graduated to takeout barbecue for about 5 years. Now we go to a nice restaurant for Thanksgiving.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
The post-dessert tomato pie.
November 26, 2025 at 10:12 PM
The post-dessert tomato pie.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
My mother’s family insisted that before we could eat the meal we had to slurp down a hellish combination of 7-UP, canned bananas, cherries, and grapes. My grandmother, a saintly and patient woman, became a beast every Thanksgiving walking up and down the table demanding EVERYONE SLURP UP AND FINISH.
November 26, 2025 at 10:11 PM
My mother’s family insisted that before we could eat the meal we had to slurp down a hellish combination of 7-UP, canned bananas, cherries, and grapes. My grandmother, a saintly and patient woman, became a beast every Thanksgiving walking up and down the table demanding EVERYONE SLURP UP AND FINISH.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
My husband’s family would serve an antipasto course (cured meats and mozzarella and bread, etc), then serve a pasta with sausage and meatballs, then clear that away and serve turkey, stuffing, all the sides, etc.
November 26, 2025 at 10:10 PM
My husband’s family would serve an antipasto course (cured meats and mozzarella and bread, etc), then serve a pasta with sausage and meatballs, then clear that away and serve turkey, stuffing, all the sides, etc.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
We roll. After dinner but before dessert, we lay in the living room and slowly roll on the floor to settle the food. I’m no doctor but it WORKS!
November 26, 2025 at 10:08 PM
We roll. After dinner but before dessert, we lay in the living room and slowly roll on the floor to settle the food. I’m no doctor but it WORKS!
Tell me something that’s Thanksgiving tradition in your family that would be super weird to folks on the outside.
November 26, 2025 at 10:04 PM
Tell me something that’s Thanksgiving tradition in your family that would be super weird to folks on the outside.
The New Yorker has picked a side.
November 26, 2025 at 9:28 PM
The New Yorker has picked a side.
Careful. Pictures of the shooting aftermath floating around.
November 26, 2025 at 8:08 PM
Careful. Pictures of the shooting aftermath floating around.
As always, George’s threads are a source of immense economic knowledge. Another great one.
Beige Book word counts: uncertainty continues to fall as focus on tariffs declines, while labor markets offer a very mixed picture. Hiring was mentioned near the most frequently on record but layoff mentions also accelerating; that latter indicator has worked as a recession indicator historically.
November 26, 2025 at 8:05 PM
As always, George’s threads are a source of immense economic knowledge. Another great one.
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
I hope that the press finds a source about the DC shooting other than the White House because I don't trust anything they say. Not one thing.
DC shooting live blog in case you just got online: www.bbc.com/news/live/cm...
DC shooting live blog in case you just got online: www.bbc.com/news/live/cm...
November 26, 2025 at 8:03 PM
I hope that the press finds a source about the DC shooting other than the White House because I don't trust anything they say. Not one thing.
DC shooting live blog in case you just got online: www.bbc.com/news/live/cm...
DC shooting live blog in case you just got online: www.bbc.com/news/live/cm...
Reposted by Nick (derogatory) ✨
D.C. POLICE DEPARTMENT SAYS SUSPECT IN CUSTODY
November 26, 2025 at 8:00 PM
D.C. POLICE DEPARTMENT SAYS SUSPECT IN CUSTODY
Can anyone confirm this?
SHOTS FIRED, 2 National Guard, downtown DC, just now. At least one dead. Near Farragut metro.
November 26, 2025 at 7:51 PM
Can anyone confirm this?