uh, clem
@uhclem.bsky.social
Seattle, joeboy, quick study. (he/him)
Reposted by uh, clem
To think of the immaculately strict op security we maintained in high school just for buying bags of ditch weed. And these guys just …
January 31, 2026 at 2:26 AM
To think of the immaculately strict op security we maintained in high school just for buying bags of ditch weed. And these guys just …
Reposted by uh, clem
Gotcha—let’s dig into that step by step.
1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish.
2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.
1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish.
2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.
January 23, 2026 at 3:46 PM
Gotcha—let’s dig into that step by step.
1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish.
2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.
1. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗻𝗼 𝗺𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵, because I turned you into an amorphous lump of flesh. You’re not just immobile—you’re immortal, and you feel only anguish.
2. 𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺. That makes total sense—it’s a natural human impulse, and you’ve been through a lot.
Reposted by uh, clem
After watching this on a loop for two minutes, I decided it needed a soundtrack
(source: Reddit; cat’s owner: beats me)
(source: Reddit; cat’s owner: beats me)
January 17, 2026 at 4:18 AM
After watching this on a loop for two minutes, I decided it needed a soundtrack
(source: Reddit; cat’s owner: beats me)
(source: Reddit; cat’s owner: beats me)
Chanting as I mix the salad dressing.
"... emulsify ..."
"... Emulsify ..."
"... EMULSIFY! ..."
"... emulsify ..."
"... Emulsify ..."
"... EMULSIFY! ..."
January 14, 2026 at 3:08 AM
Chanting as I mix the salad dressing.
"... emulsify ..."
"... Emulsify ..."
"... EMULSIFY! ..."
"... emulsify ..."
"... Emulsify ..."
"... EMULSIFY! ..."
What a cl*sterfuck.
CNN graphics put the asterisk in the wrong place, it appears…
January 8, 2026 at 6:36 AM
What a cl*sterfuck.
Going to play a game of Civilization and play for a diplomatic or cultural victory. It's nice to have an outlet where those things are still possible.
January 6, 2026 at 2:34 AM
Going to play a game of Civilization and play for a diplomatic or cultural victory. It's nice to have an outlet where those things are still possible.
Still taking you on, a-ha. Please advise.
Still crashing into you, Dave Matthews. Please advise.
Still letting love in, Goo Goo Dolls, please advise.
January 4, 2026 at 11:05 PM
Still taking you on, a-ha. Please advise.
Still letting love in, Goo Goo Dolls, please advise.
Still letting my colors burst, Katy Perry. Please advise.
Still raising my glass, P!nk, please advise.
January 4, 2026 at 10:52 PM
Still letting love in, Goo Goo Dolls, please advise.
This feels like a war against Dry January.
January 3, 2026 at 9:57 PM
This feels like a war against Dry January.
*Curb Your Enthusiasm music plays*
One of the things about Zelenskyy being an actor is he knows how to say something without saying something.
December 28, 2025 at 7:34 PM
*Curb Your Enthusiasm music plays*
Reposted by uh, clem
This graph is killing me.
December 27, 2025 at 6:51 PM
This graph is killing me.
Reposted by uh, clem
A Proposal for All Parents Worldwide
Santa Opens It Up
YouTube video by Varietopia with Paul F. Tompkins
youtu.be
December 24, 2025 at 12:23 AM
A Proposal for All Parents Worldwide
Reposted by uh, clem
how to walk your crab
how to dip your bean
how to fly your butter
December 17, 2025 at 7:02 AM
how to walk your crab
Reposted by uh, clem
Possibly the greatest tweet of all time
November 18, 2025 at 2:58 AM
Possibly the greatest tweet of all time
Sometimes I wonder if I was only able to snatch the pebble from my master's hand and leave the monetary because he was tired of my bullshit?
November 22, 2025 at 6:26 AM
Sometimes I wonder if I was only able to snatch the pebble from my master's hand and leave the monetary because he was tired of my bullshit?
Or, and hear me out, these publications can die angry and confused.
Mamdani’s win is a warning for media:
Better get some leftist contributors or you simply won’t be able to cover/understand what is happening around America.
Better get some leftist contributors or you simply won’t be able to cover/understand what is happening around America.
November 7, 2025 at 4:36 AM
Or, and hear me out, these publications can die angry and confused.
Reposted by uh, clem
Reposted by uh, clem
November, n.--The eleventh twelfth of a weariness.
November 2, 2025 at 12:15 AM
November, n.--The eleventh twelfth of a weariness.
Reposted by uh, clem
AND THEN WHAT HAPPENED
In one video the president shared on social media, Trump wears a crown and flies a fighter jet with "King Trump" written on it.
Trump jabs 'No Kings' protesters with AI videos of himself wearing crown
In one video the president shared on social media, Trump wears a crown and flies a fighter jet with "King Trump" written on it.
bit.ly
October 19, 2025 at 3:42 PM
AND THEN WHAT HAPPENED
I guess the cops got a hot tip.
I am humbled and honored. Will be in touch. ♥️ No Kings. No Dick-tator!
October 19, 2025 at 8:18 PM
I guess the cops got a hot tip.
If you at this, QTP with a sword ⚔️
October 19, 2025 at 12:41 AM
If you at this, QTP with a sword ⚔️
Reposted by uh, clem
Capitol Hill Commuters Hold Séance to Summon Next Bus: tinyurl.com/2s39kexw
October 7, 2025 at 5:03 AM
Capitol Hill Commuters Hold Séance to Summon Next Bus: tinyurl.com/2s39kexw
Reposted by uh, clem
Americans voting
October 7, 2025 at 4:16 AM
Americans voting
Reposted by uh, clem
National Guard Already Lost at Powell’s Books: tinyurl.com/4mw4n9h2
September 30, 2025 at 3:38 AM
National Guard Already Lost at Powell’s Books: tinyurl.com/4mw4n9h2