Paul F. Tompkins
@pftompkins.bsky.social
TV & standup & improv & podcasts, hardly any movies
paulftompkins.com/live
paulftompkins.com/live
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
As someone who is this guy's age I can tell you 100% that if you were into Pixies, Nirvana, 120 Minutes stuff, etc. but didn't like the Beatles you had to have worked hard to contort yourself into that special little box. Your enemy, if you absolutely needed one, was hair metal. GTFO here with this.
November 23, 2025 at 1:27 PM
As someone who is this guy's age I can tell you 100% that if you were into Pixies, Nirvana, 120 Minutes stuff, etc. but didn't like the Beatles you had to have worked hard to contort yourself into that special little box. Your enemy, if you absolutely needed one, was hair metal. GTFO here with this.
When dogs sigh it is the craziest thing in the world, deserving of the loudest “OH REALLY” you can muster
it's funny to me when a dog is really sleepy. oh are you all burnt out from lying around all day? did you think too much with your primitive and underdeveloped brain? yeah I can see why you can barely keep your eyes open
November 23, 2025 at 7:09 AM
When dogs sigh it is the craziest thing in the world, deserving of the loudest “OH REALLY” you can muster
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Teamsters would never. But, also, too, even if you aren't a union member never, ever cross a picket line.
November 23, 2025 at 5:59 AM
Teamsters would never. But, also, too, even if you aren't a union member never, ever cross a picket line.
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
that humble little crocodile has returned
November 23, 2025 at 6:35 AM
that humble little crocodile has returned
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Your periodic reminder that @radiofreetom.bsky.social who many of you like to follow, and who writes for the Atlantic, was pushing the great replacement theory before Trump and has never apologized for it. He's part of what got us here.
October 26, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Your periodic reminder that @radiofreetom.bsky.social who many of you like to follow, and who writes for the Atlantic, was pushing the great replacement theory before Trump and has never apologized for it. He's part of what got us here.
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
It is such a disorienting feeling when someone you care about but hadn't talked to that much in a couple of years dies suddenly because there is now a freshly dug hole inside of you and yet the day to day routine of your life has not been altered one bit. www.welcometohellworld.com/watertown-ma...
Watertown, Massachusetts
This piece appears in my book We Had It Coming.
I am sitting in a waiting room right now none of us ever want to be inside of crying about an old friend I'm not entirely sure is even gone yet. The te...
www.welcometohellworld.com
November 22, 2025 at 1:38 PM
It is such a disorienting feeling when someone you care about but hadn't talked to that much in a couple of years dies suddenly because there is now a freshly dug hole inside of you and yet the day to day routine of your life has not been altered one bit. www.welcometohellworld.com/watertown-ma...
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Salad sucks and we eat it under protest, this isn’t complicated
Fast-casual salad chain Sweetgreen is struggling as its traffic and sales continue to fall and it reports millions in losses each quarter.
The company hasn’t figured out how to turn a profit.
The company hasn’t figured out how to turn a profit.
Why Americans are giving up on Sweetgreen
The fast-casual chain Sweetgreen's struggles are worsening.
cnb.cx
November 23, 2025 at 4:08 AM
Salad sucks and we eat it under protest, this isn’t complicated
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Marimar Martinez is a US citizen who was shot by ICE five times in Chicago.
She was then arrested, labelled a “domestic terrorist” and slandered on social media.
All charges against her have been dropped.
In this interview she shows on of the seven holes the ICE agent put in her body.
She was then arrested, labelled a “domestic terrorist” and slandered on social media.
All charges against her have been dropped.
In this interview she shows on of the seven holes the ICE agent put in her body.
November 22, 2025 at 4:59 AM
Marimar Martinez is a US citizen who was shot by ICE five times in Chicago.
She was then arrested, labelled a “domestic terrorist” and slandered on social media.
All charges against her have been dropped.
In this interview she shows on of the seven holes the ICE agent put in her body.
She was then arrested, labelled a “domestic terrorist” and slandered on social media.
All charges against her have been dropped.
In this interview she shows on of the seven holes the ICE agent put in her body.
If RFKj could cry what would the consistency of the tears be? I bet viscous
November 23, 2025 at 3:44 AM
If RFKj could cry what would the consistency of the tears be? I bet viscous
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Fuckin rocking out
November 20, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Fuckin rocking out
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
He said "Amen" straight into the drop
Lmao Pope Leo threw a rave for an archbishop's 75th birthday this is kind of incredible
Lmao Pope Leo threw a rave for an archbishop's 75th birthday this is kind of incredible
November 20, 2025 at 4:22 PM
He said "Amen" straight into the drop
Lmao Pope Leo threw a rave for an archbishop's 75th birthday this is kind of incredible
Lmao Pope Leo threw a rave for an archbishop's 75th birthday this is kind of incredible
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
every year someone does a study that’s like “we gave 100 homeless ppl money and their lives improved” and every year the government kills that guy
November 21, 2025 at 4:44 PM
every year someone does a study that’s like “we gave 100 homeless ppl money and their lives improved” and every year the government kills that guy
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
I wonder if right now, zohran is talking to his wife about the smell
November 22, 2025 at 2:54 AM
I wonder if right now, zohran is talking to his wife about the smell
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
MTG should have to go give scared straight lectures at high schools about looking at your phone too much
November 22, 2025 at 4:55 AM
MTG should have to go give scared straight lectures at high schools about looking at your phone too much
I feel like a lot of us in the comedy world failed the world at large when we stayed silent despite knowing all about Cosby and Louis so let me say right now that Steve Martin has eaten one banjo a year for the last 25 years
November 22, 2025 at 5:00 AM
I feel like a lot of us in the comedy world failed the world at large when we stayed silent despite knowing all about Cosby and Louis so let me say right now that Steve Martin has eaten one banjo a year for the last 25 years
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
MTG is resigning from Congress because she has agreed to be my business partner in a cart selling the world's first alcoholic hot dogs
November 22, 2025 at 3:04 AM
MTG is resigning from Congress because she has agreed to be my business partner in a cart selling the world's first alcoholic hot dogs
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
i love how bsky posters are so eager to appear worldly and wise that they'll jump to say "AND YOU'RE SURPRISED????" to the craziest shit that's ever happened. if bluesky existed on 9/11/01 you fucking bet these people would out here with "obviously, everyone with a brain cell could see this coming"
does mamdani smell really good in person or something. like he seems very charming yes but what the fuck lol
November 22, 2025 at 1:16 AM
i love how bsky posters are so eager to appear worldly and wise that they'll jump to say "AND YOU'RE SURPRISED????" to the craziest shit that's ever happened. if bluesky existed on 9/11/01 you fucking bet these people would out here with "obviously, everyone with a brain cell could see this coming"
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Should I join Threads or should I watch Secret Lives of Mormon Wives:
o Yes
o No
o Yes
o No
November 22, 2025 at 4:04 AM
Should I join Threads or should I watch Secret Lives of Mormon Wives:
o Yes
o No
o Yes
o No
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
November 22, 2025 at 1:04 AM
imagine walking down the beach and seeing jesus carrying some guy
If Marjorie Taylor Greene won’t fight for us who will
November 22, 2025 at 3:21 AM
If Marjorie Taylor Greene won’t fight for us who will
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
who is following you dorks that you feel the need to repeatedly post that mtg is not on the side of the angels. it feels like spending a lot of time telling people not to eat hams they find on the ground
November 22, 2025 at 2:16 AM
who is following you dorks that you feel the need to repeatedly post that mtg is not on the side of the angels. it feels like spending a lot of time telling people not to eat hams they find on the ground
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
In the 1930s & 40s Hollywood execs changed all the up-and-coming starlets’ names because they all came in with names like Blanchetta Blinkeldonk or Mary Gutts
June 30, 2025 at 2:25 PM
In the 1930s & 40s Hollywood execs changed all the up-and-coming starlets’ names because they all came in with names like Blanchetta Blinkeldonk or Mary Gutts
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
Neither rain nor sleet nor ICE
A U.S. postal worker on Long Island is accused of trying to help a man escape from ICE custody earlier this month, according to a federal criminal complaint: https://gothamist.visitlink.me/YNagDp
US postal worker charged with breaking man out of ICE custody on Long Island
Police arrested the worker and the man she tried to free.
gothamist.visitlink.me
November 21, 2025 at 2:27 AM
Neither rain nor sleet nor ICE
Reposted by Paul F. Tompkins
im fucking crying dawg
November 20, 2025 at 8:05 PM
im fucking crying dawg
I call this “The Vaudevillian’s Friend”
Every few years I feel compelled to post about the best hotel hack ever, because every time I post about it, it turns out to be new to lots of folks …
November 20, 2025 at 7:38 AM
I call this “The Vaudevillian’s Friend”