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Glasgow Kiss

@xanderglasgow.bsky.social

690 followers 230 following 1.1K posts

I never saved anything for the swim back. 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 Don’t Carpe DM me.

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · Apr 18

Whenever I see a picture of this outfit, I always think to myself, “that must’ve cost him an arm and a leg”.

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 57m

We hear you Ravinder, oh and while I’ve got you, how’s my claim coming along for the car accident, I wasn’t involved in?

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Bigthinkingcap @bigthinkingcap.bsky.social · 12d

sure sure just sign the NDA,sugarplum

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Sadie @coatsee.bsky.social · 13d

Can you imagine if the Jerky Boys were around today?

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 1h

❤️

Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 1h

When you try to get the wee eyes, to stick to the face you’re making with fuzzy felt but they won’t stick exactly where you want them to go & now the cunts face looks weird & his squinty eyes are following you around the room & the only way you can escape this nightmare is to smash it up. AMARITE?!?

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 2h

The eternal battle between my circadian rhythm and the algorithm.

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 2h

Cheer up Donald, you’re still in the running for the “Nobel Piece of Shit Prize”. 🏆

Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 3h

Welcome to your fifties, where every compliment you receive, is followed by, “..for your age”.

“You look good…for your age”

“You can bench quite a lot ….for your age”

I usually return the compliment with, “you talk really good…..for your intelligence”.

Then we all feel good about ourselves.

🥰

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Cosmic Clau @cosmicclau.bsky.social · 1d

trying to get comfortable on two thirds of a couch cos one third contains dog toys

- a memoir

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 3h

Congratulations, you’re through to the next round of Bluesky.

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CrazyMyra @outonthemoors.bsky.social · 4h

To cats, trippy music doesn't mean psychedelics

Sketch of a cat walking determinedly between the legs of a human

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 3h

We've profiled you based on your actual profile and it reads disconnectedly as an erotic thriller of the highest intelligence, I might add hilarious. If you ever commit a crime I'll be the first to put red herring in bio, let's alt away together

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 12h

Just wash it down with an expresso.

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Joe G @eastendjoe.bsky.social · 2d

Best 3 minutes you will spend on the internet today.

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canadian blondii ︎✌🏼 @savageblondii.bsky.social · 1d

you haven’t deleted your account and come back 3 hours later in a while… you good?

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LovelyDeep @midnightviolets.bsky.social · 5d

when two people argue online, i believe whoever spells correctly

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 14h

What the world needs now, is a good old fashioned, dance craze.

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 14h

Sent an apprentice to get some tartan paint once.

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BrujoLoco☠️🖤🏺 @patnspankme.bsky.social · 18h

it’s antifa annual membership dues time

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Tusk Jenkins @tuskjenkins.bsky.social · 16h

Be careful saying negative things about yourself breathing through bamboo from the bottom of a pond. People walking by will tell the pond positive things about it and you'll believe them I love you pond

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Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 16h

Norway José.

Glasgow Kiss @xanderglasgow.bsky.social · 16h

Write to “Points of View”.

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Wiserafter90 @wiserafter90.bsky.social · 23h

"A man, after he has brushed off the dust and chips of his life, will have left only the hard, clean question: Was it good or was it evil? Have I done well--or ill? John Steinbeck. " The more we learn the more we realize how little we know." Buckminster Fuller.

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S🌟tella @havishaf.bsky.social · 23h

What’s wrong with people who actually reach out after you said “feel free to reach out if you need anything”?

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Cosmic Clau @cosmicclau.bsky.social · 1d

sometimes i think i'm doing ok then i start driving with the handbrake still up

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