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Dak

@dak.myatproto.social

35K followers 1.2K following 460 posts

I’m here to escape from reality Feeder: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:piswk46uuf4lsb2ms7lu2b76/feed/aaaihct52zljg

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Dak @dak.myatproto.social · Jul 19

I didn’t grow up in the wild, but I was raised by a family who used margarine containers as Tupperware.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 46m

I finally achieved balance. I am equally disappointed in myself as I am in the rest of the species.

Reposted by Dak

BEAVE @beaveinflow.bsky.social · 6h

Honestly shocked no one has written a hit song about my butthole yet.

Reposted by Dak

andy vs. @im-all-id.me · 15h

Bluesky taught me the joy of blocking. I block people everywhere now. I just blocked an ex boyfriend on duolingo. I can't stop.

Reposted by Dak

weeder @weeder.bsky.social · 6h

Is it safe to drink spring water in autumn or should I pour it out?

Reposted by Dak

Mary Gillis @marygillis.bsky.social · 4h

I like it when there are a bunch of people on here talking about a sporting event that I'm not watching.

It's like seeing a flock of pigeons eating a smashed sidewalk donut together. I'm not partaking, but you guys dig in.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 53m

The news said we're running out of fresh water. I'm not worried. My generation already knows how to survive on a diet of regret and social media updates.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 3h

Thanks I was lost for a while

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 3h

I think I migrated successfully

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 13h

The real cultural moment is the fear of fleeting popularity only to be swiftly forgotten by algorithms.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 15h

I trust a celebrity apology less than a streaming service promising “no ads”.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 18h

I haven’t watched any of the prestige shows. My brain is simply too preoccupied with watching videos of people falling.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 20h

Thanks for reaching out

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 20h

No. It’s me. Thanks. I’m trying to migrate to myatproto.social

https://myatproto.social

[-----------------------------------------] | _____________________________________ | | [ CD-ROM 16X ] | | [______________________________.______] | | .oO ...

myatproto.social

Reposted by Dak

Surprised Face Guy @surprisedface.bsky.social · 23h

Sex so kinky the memory foam mattress drinks to forget

Reposted by Dak

jordan @jordangerous.bsky.social · 22h

sure, I could think before I speak, but where’s the fun in that?

Reposted by Dak

Gef the Toking Mongoose @geftokingmongoose.bsky.social · 22h

A Star Wars Sister Act crossover film called Force of Habit

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 21h

The only thing more disappointing than my dating life is the 20 years it took for them to announce The Simpsons Movie 2.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 21h

I saw a trailer for a new episode of the Kardashians. I'd rather invest that energy into finding my car keys.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 22h

My entire personality is now 80% based on the four-second clip I saw on a "For You" page.

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 23h

Who should you follow, you ask?
👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇

Forrest Plump @nahyoudoit.bsky.social · 1d

🎶 she’s some kind of wonderful, yes she is 🎶

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 23h

I looked into the abyss. It offered me a coupon for 10% off my next emotional breakdown.

Reposted by Dak

d.ly @dly.bsky.social · 1d

I think it's very cool that we're able to make each other laugh

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 1d

The biggest failure of global politics is that we can't all just agree to hate the same guy.

Reposted by Dak

Frovo @frovo.bsky.social · 2d

it's called a fleshlight because jack-o-lantern was taken

Dak @dak.myatproto.social · 1d

Scientists say the universe is vast. Yeah? Well, I still can't find my keys. Scale is relative.