Baroness Schadenfreude
@helenahoneypot.bsky.social
Pinned
Microplastics? In my micropenis?
Gonna short Jesus
Jesus Christ did not return to Earth in 2025 — returning a tidy annualized profit for some bettors on Polymarket and even beating US Treasury bills before fees.
Wagers are now open for 2026, with a potential 5,700% gain in the event of a Second Coming: bloom.bg/3LgMhW8
📷️: Egberto Ras/AFP via Getty
Wagers are now open for 2026, with a potential 5,700% gain in the event of a Second Coming: bloom.bg/3LgMhW8
📷️: Egberto Ras/AFP via Getty
January 3, 2026 at 3:06 AM
Gonna short Jesus
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
I just hope that even in the afterlife, she’s down there still following her passions - blaming women for being raped and calling gay people freaks
December 28, 2025 at 8:58 PM
I just hope that even in the afterlife, she’s down there still following her passions - blaming women for being raped and calling gay people freaks
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Such a shame to hear about Brigitte Bardot. 91 is too young of an age to be taken out of this world, and it’s so depressing to think that she’s no longer out there doing what she loved - getting charged by the French government for inciting racial hatred for a seventh time 😔
December 28, 2025 at 8:54 PM
Such a shame to hear about Brigitte Bardot. 91 is too young of an age to be taken out of this world, and it’s so depressing to think that she’s no longer out there doing what she loved - getting charged by the French government for inciting racial hatred for a seventh time 😔
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Christmas is just 20 days away...
December 5, 2025 at 7:26 PM
Christmas is just 20 days away...
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
I just saw this photo and now you have to see this photo
November 14, 2025 at 7:18 PM
I just saw this photo and now you have to see this photo
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
a lesson here for us all
A French cyclist survived for three days after a horrendous 130-foot fall into a ravine, kept alive by the bottles of red wine he had in his shopping bag, police said.
Cyclist falls down 130-foot ravine in France, survives 3 days by drinking wine he had in shopping bag
A helicopter airlifted him to hospital, with a rescue doctor calling his survival "a miracle."
cbsn.ws
October 31, 2025 at 12:56 PM
a lesson here for us all
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
My body is a temple.
More specifically, Shirley.
More specifically, Shirley.
April 17, 2025 at 10:14 PM
My body is a temple.
More specifically, Shirley.
More specifically, Shirley.
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
"Bitch, I will fight you"
To shut down rude behavior instantly, try a simple yet powerful five-word response.
Use this 5-word phrase when someone is rude to you—it's like 'holding up a mirror,' says public speaking expert
When we encounter a rude person, our first instinct might be to fire back with a snarky comment. But that's not the right move, says public speaking expert John Bowe. Here's the perfect response to instantly shut down rude behavior.
cnb.cx
October 6, 2025 at 4:36 AM
"Bitch, I will fight you"
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Happy Rapture Day!
September 23, 2025 at 2:35 PM
Happy Rapture Day!
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Thankfully we never had to rally around defending James Cordon
September 22, 2025 at 8:29 PM
Thankfully we never had to rally around defending James Cordon
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Daddy-son roleplay: I cry at a restaurant and all the other parents start judging you
September 6, 2025 at 4:45 PM
Daddy-son roleplay: I cry at a restaurant and all the other parents start judging you
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Don’t bother having empathy for Charlie Kirk. He literally didn’t believe in the concept of empathy.
In his own words: “I think empathy is a made up New Age term that does a lot of damage."
In his own words: “I think empathy is a made up New Age term that does a lot of damage."
September 10, 2025 at 10:11 PM
Don’t bother having empathy for Charlie Kirk. He literally didn’t believe in the concept of empathy.
In his own words: “I think empathy is a made up New Age term that does a lot of damage."
In his own words: “I think empathy is a made up New Age term that does a lot of damage."
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
if someone tells me they’re scared of the subway I steal their wallet
August 24, 2025 at 1:30 AM
if someone tells me they’re scared of the subway I steal their wallet
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
I think Im ready to enter my kaftan stage of life.
August 15, 2025 at 9:25 AM
I think Im ready to enter my kaftan stage of life.
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
reverse cowgirl so i can download pdfs
July 29, 2025 at 3:46 PM
reverse cowgirl so i can download pdfs
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
I seriously do not know how this title got through even a single launch meeting.
July 29, 2025 at 3:58 PM
I seriously do not know how this title got through even a single launch meeting.
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
I hate when someone unearths my pube-autograph to the world's most famous pedophile while I'm dying of cankles
July 18, 2025 at 12:14 AM
I hate when someone unearths my pube-autograph to the world's most famous pedophile while I'm dying of cankles
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
2000's era educational school video about financial literacy called Frugalicious
June 25, 2025 at 9:06 PM
2000's era educational school video about financial literacy called Frugalicious
Reposted by Baroness Schadenfreude
Inject it into my veins
"Andrew Cuomo is visibly upset and people are crying"
June 25, 2025 at 2:50 AM
Inject it into my veins