Mark Berrong
@markberrong.bsky.social
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Instead of watching Trump's speech tonight, watch a Rob Reiner movie!
December 17, 2025 at 2:19 PM
Instead of watching Trump's speech tonight, watch a Rob Reiner movie!
Just a heads-up: if I don't get my standard 37 dolls for Xmas this year, I will go apeshit.
December 16, 2025 at 5:07 PM
Just a heads-up: if I don't get my standard 37 dolls for Xmas this year, I will go apeshit.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Please stop sending highly-skilled assassins to murder me. It's mean and it hurts my feelings
December 14, 2025 at 2:15 AM
Please stop sending highly-skilled assassins to murder me. It's mean and it hurts my feelings
Reposted by Mark Berrong
If you fall for a billionaire telling you to hate your neighbors, especially if you claim to be Christian, I don't know, man. That's pretty stupid.
November 30, 2025 at 9:41 PM
If you fall for a billionaire telling you to hate your neighbors, especially if you claim to be Christian, I don't know, man. That's pretty stupid.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
coworker: hey are you going to the all-hands meeting?
me: (has feet for feet) no i'm not allowed to
me: (has feet for feet) no i'm not allowed to
November 23, 2025 at 8:53 PM
coworker: hey are you going to the all-hands meeting?
me: (has feet for feet) no i'm not allowed to
me: (has feet for feet) no i'm not allowed to
Reposted by Mark Berrong
The irony is that "Quiet, piggy!" is exactly what St. Peter plans to tell Trump.
November 18, 2025 at 3:23 PM
The irony is that "Quiet, piggy!" is exactly what St. Peter plans to tell Trump.
Starting to think that the drunk lumberjack from Real World Boston might not have been the best choice for Secretary of Transportation.
November 6, 2025 at 1:52 AM
Starting to think that the drunk lumberjack from Real World Boston might not have been the best choice for Secretary of Transportation.
Say what you will about Dick Cheney, but ultimately he was a terrible person responsible for the deaths of many under false pretenses.
November 4, 2025 at 2:53 PM
Say what you will about Dick Cheney, but ultimately he was a terrible person responsible for the deaths of many under false pretenses.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Heavens to Betsy
Betsy to Heavens
Heavens BACK to Betsy
Betsy GOOOOOAAAALLLLLLLL
Betsy to Heavens
Heavens BACK to Betsy
Betsy GOOOOOAAAALLLLLLLL
October 17, 2025 at 11:54 AM
Heavens to Betsy
Betsy to Heavens
Heavens BACK to Betsy
Betsy GOOOOOAAAALLLLLLLL
Betsy to Heavens
Heavens BACK to Betsy
Betsy GOOOOOAAAALLLLLLLL
Reposted by Mark Berrong
After everybody went nuts over it in theaters last week, we decided we wanted Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile out there as soon as possible.
We're releasing it this Thursday, and we've made it free for everybody.
All we ask is that you watch it, hopefully on a TV, next to as many people as you can.
We're releasing it this Thursday, and we've made it free for everybody.
All we ask is that you watch it, hopefully on a TV, next to as many people as you can.
Forget everything you already know about America's most notorious dead person.
Watch Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile at Thursday, Oct. 9 at 7 p.m. ET/6 p.m. CT.
Only at The Onion on Youtube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjhSoGcQhWU.
Watch Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile at Thursday, Oct. 9 at 7 p.m. ET/6 p.m. CT.
Only at The Onion on Youtube here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XjhSoGcQhWU.
October 7, 2025 at 7:39 PM
After everybody went nuts over it in theaters last week, we decided we wanted Jeffrey Epstein: Bad Pedophile out there as soon as possible.
We're releasing it this Thursday, and we've made it free for everybody.
All we ask is that you watch it, hopefully on a TV, next to as many people as you can.
We're releasing it this Thursday, and we've made it free for everybody.
All we ask is that you watch it, hopefully on a TV, next to as many people as you can.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
You know, we’re not so different you and I. I’ve got my head stuck up my own ass, and you’ve got your entire asshole wrapped around your own head. Different sides of the same coin.
October 1, 2025 at 6:08 PM
You know, we’re not so different you and I. I’ve got my head stuck up my own ass, and you’ve got your entire asshole wrapped around your own head. Different sides of the same coin.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Elvis is the rare celebrity of yesteryear that if anything would fit in even more today because he was super into self defense and being high on drugs and talking to a crooked President and dating a teenager, he’d 100000% have a crypto thing going on
September 28, 2025 at 4:00 AM
Elvis is the rare celebrity of yesteryear that if anything would fit in even more today because he was super into self defense and being high on drugs and talking to a crooked President and dating a teenager, he’d 100000% have a crypto thing going on
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Give me fuel, give me fire
Give me space cause I’m a crier
Give me space cause I’m a crier
September 26, 2025 at 2:44 PM
Give me fuel, give me fire
Give me space cause I’m a crier
Give me space cause I’m a crier
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Why be an emergency contact when you can be the emergency.
September 25, 2025 at 10:13 PM
Why be an emergency contact when you can be the emergency.
Happy Rapture Boxing Day to all who celebrate!
September 24, 2025 at 1:29 PM
Happy Rapture Boxing Day to all who celebrate!
Reposted by Mark Berrong
I know beggars can’t be choosers but if I could get raptured like riiiight after coffee and Wordle instead of at 4:30 after a full day of work that would be great thank you
September 23, 2025 at 10:58 AM
I know beggars can’t be choosers but if I could get raptured like riiiight after coffee and Wordle instead of at 4:30 after a full day of work that would be great thank you
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Probably the most tragic part of Charlie Kirk's death is that Trump's name appears prominently and repeatedly in the Epstein files.
September 11, 2025 at 4:37 PM
Probably the most tragic part of Charlie Kirk's death is that Trump's name appears prominently and repeatedly in the Epstein files.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Good morning.
It’s his letter.
It’s his signature.
He’s a pedophile.
Have a nice day.
It’s his letter.
It’s his signature.
He’s a pedophile.
Have a nice day.
September 10, 2025 at 12:14 PM
Good morning.
It’s his letter.
It’s his signature.
He’s a pedophile.
Have a nice day.
It’s his letter.
It’s his signature.
He’s a pedophile.
Have a nice day.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Important to remember that everyone involved in renaming the DoD to the Department of War is afraid to take the subway.
September 5, 2025 at 10:42 PM
Important to remember that everyone involved in renaming the DoD to the Department of War is afraid to take the subway.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
They’re whitewashing our history in books and museums
…recruiting Nazis into ICE.
…deploying the military into our cities.
…shielding the pedophiles and predators in their ranks.
…stealing your data, social security & Medicaid.
Because some of you couldn’t handle pronouns.
…recruiting Nazis into ICE.
…deploying the military into our cities.
…shielding the pedophiles and predators in their ranks.
…stealing your data, social security & Medicaid.
Because some of you couldn’t handle pronouns.
August 20, 2025 at 11:35 AM
They’re whitewashing our history in books and museums
…recruiting Nazis into ICE.
…deploying the military into our cities.
…shielding the pedophiles and predators in their ranks.
…stealing your data, social security & Medicaid.
Because some of you couldn’t handle pronouns.
…recruiting Nazis into ICE.
…deploying the military into our cities.
…shielding the pedophiles and predators in their ranks.
…stealing your data, social security & Medicaid.
Because some of you couldn’t handle pronouns.
Reposted by Mark Berrong
Getting mugged>>>>fascism
Trump: "Already they're saying, 'He's a dictator!" The place is going to hell and we got to stop it. So instead of saying 'he's a dictator' they should say 'we're going to join him in making Washington safe.' They say 'he's a dictator!' and then they end up getting mugged."
August 13, 2025 at 6:03 PM
Getting mugged>>>>fascism
Man who doesn't understand how vaccines work promises revolutionary new vaccine!
Come on AP. He slashed $500 million in funding for mRNA technology and then strung a bunch of words that sound good if you know literally nothing about vaccines, but this statement is actual science fiction and reporting it without saying this isn’t how immunity works at all is frankly dangerous.
August 6, 2025 at 1:01 PM
Man who doesn't understand how vaccines work promises revolutionary new vaccine!