PrplMonkeyMan
@prplmonkeyman.bsky.social
"... absolute obscenity, sometimes, but not always, tempered by wit, humor, and drollery..." he/him
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*Through gritted teeth* Je suis Don Lemon
January 30, 2026 at 3:05 PM
*Through gritted teeth* Je suis Don Lemon
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These are my favourite trump idiotic pronouncements, the ones that have far bigger impacts on americans than Canadians. Just the dumbest loudest idiot to ever live.
January 30, 2026 at 1:40 AM
These are my favourite trump idiotic pronouncements, the ones that have far bigger impacts on americans than Canadians. Just the dumbest loudest idiot to ever live.
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I have been arguing since the great anti Muslim panic under Bush that conservatives are fucking weak ass fuckers. They’re goddamned scared of EVERYTHING. Muslims. Black people. Women. Drag queens. I’ve never seen a more scared ass group in my life. They’re fucking scared of WHISTLES.
January 29, 2026 at 2:43 AM
I have been arguing since the great anti Muslim panic under Bush that conservatives are fucking weak ass fuckers. They’re goddamned scared of EVERYTHING. Muslims. Black people. Women. Drag queens. I’ve never seen a more scared ass group in my life. They’re fucking scared of WHISTLES.
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finally a good dating app
TOM HOMAN: “We’re going to create a database where those people that are arrested for interference, impeding and assault, we’re going to make them famous. We’re going to put their face on TV. We’re going to let their employers, in their neighborhoods, in their schools, know who these people are.”
Story: www.cnn.com/2026/01/27/u...
January 27, 2026 at 8:52 PM
finally a good dating app
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A reminder that ICE hasn’t slowed down in Minneapolis at all.
Outside of Minnesota, it might feel like everything has changed since Alex Pretti’s murder. But ICE hasn’t actually lost any power and they’re continuing to terrorize our communities.
Outside of Minnesota, it might feel like everything has changed since Alex Pretti’s murder. But ICE hasn’t actually lost any power and they’re continuing to terrorize our communities.
January 27, 2026 at 7:57 PM
A reminder that ICE hasn’t slowed down in Minneapolis at all.
Outside of Minnesota, it might feel like everything has changed since Alex Pretti’s murder. But ICE hasn’t actually lost any power and they’re continuing to terrorize our communities.
Outside of Minnesota, it might feel like everything has changed since Alex Pretti’s murder. But ICE hasn’t actually lost any power and they’re continuing to terrorize our communities.
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Walter Crank-ite, amirite?
January 27, 2026 at 12:40 PM
Walter Crank-ite, amirite?
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Really hard to look at this and all the other examples of bravery and kindness from ordinary people in this moment not think also of the tremendous cowardice exhibited over the past year by some of the richest, most well-protected people in business, media and politics
Let us all have the courage displayed by the residents of Minneapolis.
January 25, 2026 at 2:24 PM
Really hard to look at this and all the other examples of bravery and kindness from ordinary people in this moment not think also of the tremendous cowardice exhibited over the past year by some of the richest, most well-protected people in business, media and politics
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Everything else aside imagine throwing a watch party for a movie about yourself. I'd rather eat nails
An insane, perfect encapsulation of it all:
The same day Trump’s agents kill a Veterans Affairs ICU nurse in broad daylight, the CEOs of Apple and Amazon join Trump to watch a private screening of a film about his wife directed by an alleged sexual abuser who was seen shirtless in the Epstein Files
The same day Trump’s agents kill a Veterans Affairs ICU nurse in broad daylight, the CEOs of Apple and Amazon join Trump to watch a private screening of a film about his wife directed by an alleged sexual abuser who was seen shirtless in the Epstein Files
January 25, 2026 at 4:36 AM
Everything else aside imagine throwing a watch party for a movie about yourself. I'd rather eat nails
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every great laker has a little switch in the back of their head and if you flip it they decide they only get to go to lutheran heaven if they kill a plantation owner and the more plantation owners they kill the more lutheran the heaven they get to go to becomes
January 19, 2026 at 7:00 PM
every great laker has a little switch in the back of their head and if you flip it they decide they only get to go to lutheran heaven if they kill a plantation owner and the more plantation owners they kill the more lutheran the heaven they get to go to becomes
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rethuglicans commonly look at the upper midwest and go “oh there’s a ton of germans there of course they’ll be That Kind of german”
wrong bitch. we all came over in the 1860s and immediately signed up to kill slavers
wrong bitch. we all came over in the 1860s and immediately signed up to kill slavers
Minnesota has one of the largest Nordic ancestry percentages in the country (and tons of Germans, too). There's a ton of Norwegian and Swedish-established colleges, churches, towns, etc. ICE and MAGA were *definitely* betting on those "pure blood Norse" helping them out, instead of being good people
ICE and MAGA really did bet the farm on all of Minneapolis’s white people going “oh yes, please take away our disgusting, evil non-white-foreigner neighbors, oh thank you so much.”
it’s beautiful that they’ve been proven incredibly wrong about that - may the rest of the country do the same.
it’s beautiful that they’ve been proven incredibly wrong about that - may the rest of the country do the same.
January 19, 2026 at 6:54 PM
rethuglicans commonly look at the upper midwest and go “oh there’s a ton of germans there of course they’ll be That Kind of german”
wrong bitch. we all came over in the 1860s and immediately signed up to kill slavers
wrong bitch. we all came over in the 1860s and immediately signed up to kill slavers
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Wake up. Make breakfast. Do email. Watch a murder. Go to a party for a 5 year old. Laugh with my daughter. See a different angle of that murder. Hear govt officials slander the victim. Play Barbies with my kid. Feed her dinner. Tear up at that victim reading last honors to a vet. Put kid to bed. USA
January 25, 2026 at 4:43 AM
Wake up. Make breakfast. Do email. Watch a murder. Go to a party for a 5 year old. Laugh with my daughter. See a different angle of that murder. Hear govt officials slander the victim. Play Barbies with my kid. Feed her dinner. Tear up at that victim reading last honors to a vet. Put kid to bed. USA
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We will live to see justice.
January 24, 2026 at 7:39 PM
We will live to see justice.
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Laying a honey trap for JD Vance.
People are definitely setting up a barricade of trash cans and this couch, in the middle of the street where ICE is.
"That's my couch," said a woman standing nearby. "It's been on my porch for four years because it won't fit up the stairs. My neighbor will be pleased it's gone now."
"That's my couch," said a woman standing nearby. "It's been on my porch for four years because it won't fit up the stairs. My neighbor will be pleased it's gone now."
January 24, 2026 at 7:03 PM
Laying a honey trap for JD Vance.
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happy 250th birthday, america. to get you in the spirit, we’ve recreated the conditions of the founding era.
January 24, 2026 at 5:22 PM
happy 250th birthday, america. to get you in the spirit, we’ve recreated the conditions of the founding era.
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There has been an increasing sense in Minneapolis that we are on our own, that our elected representatives are unwilling and/or unable to take action to get these murderous Nazi thugs out of our community. I really hope that changes today. The time for pleading TV hits ended weeks ago.
January 24, 2026 at 4:13 PM
There has been an increasing sense in Minneapolis that we are on our own, that our elected representatives are unwilling and/or unable to take action to get these murderous Nazi thugs out of our community. I really hope that changes today. The time for pleading TV hits ended weeks ago.
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Doesn’t sound like a clash then!
Live on MS NOW:
Protesters are clashing right now with federal agents on the streets of Minneapolis. Agents are shooting tear gas. Agents have their weapons raised.
Protesters are chanting, "SHAME! SHAME!"
Protesters are clashing right now with federal agents on the streets of Minneapolis. Agents are shooting tear gas. Agents have their weapons raised.
Protesters are chanting, "SHAME! SHAME!"
January 24, 2026 at 4:44 PM
Doesn’t sound like a clash then!
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The people of Minnesota are an inspiration. They’re out in the freezing cold protesting ICE brutality and protecting their communities. They're delivering groceries to their vulnerable neighbors and forming human chains around schools during pickups.
We can’t leave them to do this work alone.
We can’t leave them to do this work alone.
January 23, 2026 at 5:47 PM
The people of Minnesota are an inspiration. They’re out in the freezing cold protesting ICE brutality and protecting their communities. They're delivering groceries to their vulnerable neighbors and forming human chains around schools during pickups.
We can’t leave them to do this work alone.
We can’t leave them to do this work alone.
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that right there? that's a man with a union
January 22, 2026 at 9:18 PM
that right there? that's a man with a union
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Yesterday, I drove refugees that had been shipped off to Texas all the way back home to St. Paul
Seeing them reunite with their families reminded me this is their home.
So keep sending them to Texas. I’ll keep driving ‘em back and introducing them to Bucc-ee’s and KC barbecue along the way.
Seeing them reunite with their families reminded me this is their home.
So keep sending them to Texas. I’ll keep driving ‘em back and introducing them to Bucc-ee’s and KC barbecue along the way.
January 22, 2026 at 4:28 PM
Yesterday, I drove refugees that had been shipped off to Texas all the way back home to St. Paul
Seeing them reunite with their families reminded me this is their home.
So keep sending them to Texas. I’ll keep driving ‘em back and introducing them to Bucc-ee’s and KC barbecue along the way.
Seeing them reunite with their families reminded me this is their home.
So keep sending them to Texas. I’ll keep driving ‘em back and introducing them to Bucc-ee’s and KC barbecue along the way.
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well that was a pretty stupid 72 hours that destroyed every positive relationship we had in europe
January 21, 2026 at 7:41 PM
well that was a pretty stupid 72 hours that destroyed every positive relationship we had in europe
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I mean what are you gonna do, treat us like Roma
January 21, 2026 at 5:07 PM
I mean what are you gonna do, treat us like Roma
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I'm sorry, there'll be more considered commentary, but fundamentally he's just such an asshole.
January 21, 2026 at 2:07 PM
I'm sorry, there'll be more considered commentary, but fundamentally he's just such an asshole.
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figuratively speaking, a lot of his most rabid supporters -are- speaking German
Without America, "right now, you'd all be speaking German" Trump tells an audience in Switzerland.
January 21, 2026 at 2:22 PM
figuratively speaking, a lot of his most rabid supporters -are- speaking German
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Trump: Acquire ice
America: Abolish ICE
America: Abolish ICE
Acquiring this “piece of ice…is a very small ask,” continues President Trump in his demand at Davos to acquire Greenland.
January 21, 2026 at 2:25 PM
Trump: Acquire ice
America: Abolish ICE
America: Abolish ICE