'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
@brainmage.bsky.social
Comedian/writer/voice artist/wizard. #ADHD (he/him)
Fine art photos: http://hyperfocus.photography
Stream: http://Twitch.tv/brainmage
Tips: http://ko-fi.com/guy
VO character reel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04UiLVl6n0I
Fine art photos: http://hyperfocus.photography
Stream: http://Twitch.tv/brainmage
Tips: http://ko-fi.com/guy
VO character reel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04UiLVl6n0I
You have gone too far this time
January 15, 2026 at 10:16 PM
You have gone too far this time
Oh don't worry - as one of the writers, I am fully expecting to get my share of this at some point!
January 15, 2026 at 10:09 PM
Oh don't worry - as one of the writers, I am fully expecting to get my share of this at some point!
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
Might have created the greatest shirt design of all times
January 15, 2026 at 7:32 PM
Might have created the greatest shirt design of all times
If it makes you feel better i misread that as "shit myself in both eyes" so your day could have been worse I guess
January 15, 2026 at 4:22 PM
If it makes you feel better i misread that as "shit myself in both eyes" so your day could have been worse I guess
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
This dude is intense and correct
January 15, 2026 at 9:05 AM
This dude is intense and correct
Scotch love eggs
January 15, 2026 at 2:03 PM
Scotch love eggs
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
Icke saying "My god, the shit you want us to believe" to literally anyone else is not so much 'pot calling the kettle black' as it is 'pot painted in seven layers of Vantablack and hurled into a black hole where it remerges into a universe where light makes things darker... calling the kettle black"
January 14, 2026 at 10:42 PM
Icke saying "My god, the shit you want us to believe" to literally anyone else is not so much 'pot calling the kettle black' as it is 'pot painted in seven layers of Vantablack and hurled into a black hole where it remerges into a universe where light makes things darker... calling the kettle black"
Today's lunchtime cryptic crossword stream starts at 1pm! Yaaaaay! If that's the sort of thing you like!
www.twitch.tv/brainmage
www.twitch.tv/brainmage
brainmage - Twitch
Guy Kelly. Comedian, voice actor, and general nerd. UK-based variety streamer. Cryptic crosswords during the day, and videogames at night. Like a LAN café in an old folks home. guykellyalloneword@gmai...
www.twitch.tv
January 15, 2026 at 11:47 AM
Today's lunchtime cryptic crossword stream starts at 1pm! Yaaaaay! If that's the sort of thing you like!
www.twitch.tv/brainmage
www.twitch.tv/brainmage
Not thrilled that today's twitch payment hasn't gone through for some reason. Eek.
January 15, 2026 at 10:53 AM
Not thrilled that today's twitch payment hasn't gone through for some reason. Eek.
The things is, it IS appropriate and accommodating to denote satire, which is why I am bitterly disappointed that you didn’t post the piece on a satirical website. You fucking monster.
January 15, 2026 at 10:44 AM
The things is, it IS appropriate and accommodating to denote satire, which is why I am bitterly disappointed that you didn’t post the piece on a satirical website. You fucking monster.
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
Singing power ballads seems to make you insane/hilarious
January 14, 2026 at 10:41 AM
Singing power ballads seems to make you insane/hilarious
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
Today was my 500th rodeo. I hurt myself terribly. It's dangerous at every experience level.
January 14, 2026 at 8:31 PM
Today was my 500th rodeo. I hurt myself terribly. It's dangerous at every experience level.
Surely there's *one* secret service member out there who wants to go down in history?
January 15, 2026 at 12:22 AM
Surely there's *one* secret service member out there who wants to go down in history?
You are both terrible
(Meanwhile I am a JOY)
(Meanwhile I am a JOY)
January 15, 2026 at 12:07 AM
You are both terrible
(Meanwhile I am a JOY)
(Meanwhile I am a JOY)
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
Got meself a wee project which took up my whole evening, I think people call this kind of thing a "timeline cleanse"?
January 14, 2026 at 11:45 PM
Got meself a wee project which took up my whole evening, I think people call this kind of thing a "timeline cleanse"?
Lies and slander
I just need you all to know that my husband is farting so badly that it is actually keeping me awake
January 14, 2026 at 11:34 PM
Lies and slander
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
It whips that not only is this guy absolutely going to get reinstated with back pay thanks to UNIONS but he’s already made nearly $1mil in a GFM which means many, many people are now incentivized to scream at Trump that he’s a pedophile
January 14, 2026 at 11:18 PM
It whips that not only is this guy absolutely going to get reinstated with back pay thanks to UNIONS but he’s already made nearly $1mil in a GFM which means many, many people are now incentivized to scream at Trump that he’s a pedophile
Is one good carbon monoxide leak really too much to ask for?
January 14, 2026 at 9:04 PM
Is one good carbon monoxide leak really too much to ask for?
The whole Greenland thing is, and I am tempering my words here, scaring the absolute fucking living piss out of me.
January 14, 2026 at 8:57 PM
The whole Greenland thing is, and I am tempering my words here, scaring the absolute fucking living piss out of me.
Reposted by 'i will strangle a horse' on itch.io
I like my men like I like my coffee - spilling over the hotel cuck chair while I'm otherwise engaged
I like my men how I like my coffee, forgotten in a cupboard behind a tin of beans
January 14, 2026 at 3:45 PM
I like my men like I like my coffee - spilling over the hotel cuck chair while I'm otherwise engaged
Today I learned that doggy-style used to be called horsefuckin' and frankly I think we should bring that back
January 14, 2026 at 7:40 PM
Today I learned that doggy-style used to be called horsefuckin' and frankly I think we should bring that back
Well now I'm worried. How did you know? What are my tells WHAT ARE MY TELLS???
January 14, 2026 at 7:17 PM
Well now I'm worried. How did you know? What are my tells WHAT ARE MY TELLS???
Get fukken rekt, dorks
An autistic woman who plays Dungeons & Dragons has been concocting increasingly elaborate and convoluted reasons to buy more new dice, eyewitnesses have claimed.
Justifications for buying more dice become ever more elaborate
An autistic woman who plays Dungeons & Dragons has been concocting increasingly elaborate and convoluted reasons to buy more new dice, eyewitnesses have claimed. Talia Cohen, 27, got into tabletop…
thedailytism.com
January 14, 2026 at 6:51 PM
Get fukken rekt, dorks