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human bean

@humanbean.net

1.6K followers 1K following 19K posts

I'm laughing with you. I write. I live in a fifth wheel traveling the dystopian US. Ask me anything about RV life except where i am. I like rocks and trees and writing and dogs and photography and human rights She/her.

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human bean @humanbean.net · 12h

Museum of the Forest

We drove to the forest. It was in a museum. At the door they handed us a mudspattered map already separated by too much folding into its nine panels. Chanterelles grew in the carpet. We weren’t sure if they were exhibits. We were asked to wear wellington boots to protect the mud. We put our noses to a little hole. There was an autumn day in it, dry and mushroomy. The next room was perfumed with resin, warmed by the greenblueyellow of an infrapine lamp. We rolled up the sleeves of our anoraks and the prickle of rain was applied by tiny hypodermic syringes. In the next room we had to leave all our sounds at the door. It contained the noise deer don’t really make at all when they run off. Then we were in a disorientation room with multiple paintings of the same tree and the sun always in the wrong position. They locked the turnstiles half an hour ago. The cry of the last child has faded and the sun is setting in the north. No one has told us if the carpet is for sleeping on.

Reposted by human bean

Lauren McKenzie @themckenziest.gay · 4h

Reminder that Oracle bought TikTok and has completely moved Americans into their own highly censored algorithm.

They also removed the ability to tag/search for Portland =)

Oracle is violently evil and extremely pro-genocide (Israel)

Prem Thakker ツ @premthakker.bsky.social · 6h

Huh: TikTok took down my 8-second video featuring this image of Debbie Brockman — the news producer just detained by Trump’s CBP agents — saying it violates the “joy of TikTok”

Reposted by human bean

more mr. dice guy @juniorhoncho.bsky.social · 2h

once i was with my family at T.G.I Fridays eating a mud-themed dessert, because i was a little boy, and i start choking on a gummy worm, and this is like a day after school taught us the International Choking Signal, so i do that and for about 30 seconds my parents just went What? What is that. Stop

Reposted by human bean

Sophie Sherry @sophiesherry.bsky.social · 9h

During a military-style raid on a building in Chicago’s South Shore, one resident heard a knock on his door.   It wasn’t the feds — it was a mom and her 7-year-old daughter, pleading for help.

He let them hide in his unit for the next 3 days.

chicago.suntimes.com/immigration/...

Neighbor shielded 7-year-old during South Shore federal raid: ‘I didn’t want them to take her’

During the Sept. 30 raid one tenant protected a terrified girl and her mom. Remnants at the complex, including a detailed map of all the units, offer clues to what authorities may have known before th...

chicago.suntimes.com

Reposted by human bean

ꜱ ᴛ ᴀ ʀ ʙ ʟ ᴏ ᴏ ᴅ @yurei.bsky.social · 5h

sit on a JIRA ticket and rotate

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

trees are cool tho, have you seen any good trees

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

brains are so weird [complimentary and derogatory]

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

i suspect like "how it actually feels to fall asleep" it is something i will never *know*

it'd be like the brain eating itself

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

Anyway, I am curious if anyone else does this

therapist loves to say, "does the why matter?"

i blame my drive for wanting to solve puzzles and understand things

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

is it because i grew up with a malignant narcissist mother who created narratives out of thin air and then demanded we all comply?

was this some kind of coping/survival mechanism, some kind of "i know this is true"?

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

was I training myself unknowingly? am I just imagining these scenes now, reinforced by stories told by my dad or siblings throughout my life?

sometimes hearing a song makes me see the interior of a car where i heard it, and who i was with and the smirk when they sang

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

i dont know if this is an aut thing or an adhd thing or a thing lots of people do or what

but its something i never really thought about before

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

i also thought i could damage memories, corrupt them, if i replayed them too often. So i would ration the good ones and choose when to think about them.

but when I do go back to those memories i can remember the air, the smells, the sounds. I see the rooms, the people.

human bean @humanbean.net · 6h

when i was little i was convinced that i could force myself to memorize moments if i sat very still for a moment and thought I HAVE TO REMEMBER THIS FOREVER

the weird thing is that it worked, in many cases, things I bookmarked somehow persist still

human bean @humanbean.net · 7h

don't should yourself, fuck that

bring rem the good

　　　the　　　 ghostes @rem.bsjky.team · 7h

idc if i shuold be Responsible or whatever adn remind everyone how bad shit is i want to hear good things

　　　the　　　 ghostes @rem.bsjky.team · 7h

share something good with me

human bean @humanbean.net · 7h

i swear, the whole concept of "virtue signalling" with the implied [for benefit somehow] is one of the most persistent brain worms

it knows no boundaries, it takes people from all sides

Reposted by human bean

Chris Kluwe @chriswarcraft.bsky.social · 7h

Since it is Friday, I am once again reminding you that I am running for CA Assembly District 72, and that my solemn pledge not to use any campaign funds to eat excessive amounts of tortellinis remains in effect.

These are personal tortellinis.

secure.actblue.com/donate/kluwe

A plastic bowl filled with discount tortellinis and marinara sauce

www.kluweoc.com

Reposted by human bean

Happy Thanksghouling! @spacefordogs.bsky.social · 7h

This is absolutely a “no, YOU grow teeth on your forehead to help you have sex” moment

Reposted by human bean

Django Wexler @djangowexler.bsky.social · 9h

My boss: so how's our fourth quarter looking?

Me, the sales manager at the company that makes inflatable frog suits: well, you're never going to believe this, but

human bean @humanbean.net · 7h

sometimes i go to metafilter and look for posts from "chariot pulled by cassowaries"

it makes you feel like you live in a better world, all their posts about conservation and animals recovering and nature healing

human bean @humanbean.net · 7h

human bean @humanbean.net · 7h

LOOK AT THIS WOMBAT OK

Ambitious plan for wildlife sanctuary takes shape in Southern Highlands

A conversation between a renowned wildlife carer and a philanthropist leads to the dream of creating a new wildlife sanctuary and restoring a local population of one of Australia's most loved marsupia...

human bean @humanbean.net · 7h

LOOK AT THIS WOMBAT OK

Ambitious plan for wildlife sanctuary takes shape in Southern Highlands

A conversation between a renowned wildlife carer and a philanthropist leads to the dream of creating a new wildlife sanctuary and restoring a local population of one of Australia's most loved marsupia...

Reposted by human bean

Coach Finstock @coachfinstock.bsky.social · 7h

Man I wish there was someone recording the Oval Office like they did with Nixon and Haldeman because you know they're talking about frog costumes and leftist haircuts in there and it's probably fucking gold

human bean @humanbean.net · 7h

life could be worse i guess

Ghost sharks grow forehead teeth to help them have sex

The unusual teeth tell a story about the mysteries of evolution.

human bean @humanbean.net · 7h

Mystery artists carved life-sized camels into rocks 12,000 years ago

Three newly discovered sites filled with art and stone tools have pushed back the date of when humans returned to Arabia after the last ice age.

Reposted by human bean

Faine Greenwood @faineg.bsky.social · 8h

it’s said all the time but I think we should continue to hammer home how insane it is that we got dead-eyed bros trying to sell us robots that will free us from the supposedly cruel burden of “creative careers” instead of the actual cruel burden of “doing menial household chores”

Assistant HR Director of Antifa @sethdmichaels.bsky.social · 8h

AI HUCKSTER: "i built you a machine that reads books for you."

ME: "can you build me a machine that unloads the dishwasher for me so *i* can read a book?"