Matt Jordan
@itsmattjordan.com
And you think one year of medical school entitles you to plow through the riches of my Emersonian mind?
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subj: mykslti williamson apex mt
heat or f=rest gmp? thx....
To: [email protected]
Subj: mykslti williamson apex mt
heat or f=rest gmp? thx....
February 9, 2026 at 3:34 AM
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subj: mykslti williamson apex mt
heat or f=rest gmp? thx....
To: [email protected]
Subj: mykslti williamson apex mt
heat or f=rest gmp? thx....
Unfortunately, Trump constantly going after the Kickoff Rule is extremely funny
February 9, 2026 at 2:07 AM
Unfortunately, Trump constantly going after the Kickoff Rule is extremely funny
Reposted by Matt Jordan
I'm convinced AI is our generation's radium - a discovery with genuinely useful applications in specific, controlled circumstances that we stupidly put in everything from kid's toys to toothpaste until we realised the harm far too late where future generations will ask if we were out of our minds.
February 8, 2026 at 10:23 PM
I'm convinced AI is our generation's radium - a discovery with genuinely useful applications in specific, controlled circumstances that we stupidly put in everything from kid's toys to toothpaste until we realised the harm far too late where future generations will ask if we were out of our minds.
Reposted by Matt Jordan
To be very clear, that lady in the NYT article is not making any money with her hundreds of AI slop books.
She makes money by *convincing people* she makes money that way and getting them to pay her to teach them how to do it.
It's an evolved MLM, and the NYT is helping market it.
She makes money by *convincing people* she makes money that way and getting them to pay her to teach them how to do it.
It's an evolved MLM, and the NYT is helping market it.
February 8, 2026 at 8:03 PM
To be very clear, that lady in the NYT article is not making any money with her hundreds of AI slop books.
She makes money by *convincing people* she makes money that way and getting them to pay her to teach them how to do it.
It's an evolved MLM, and the NYT is helping market it.
She makes money by *convincing people* she makes money that way and getting them to pay her to teach them how to do it.
It's an evolved MLM, and the NYT is helping market it.
While many of you are likely yelling "GO PATRIOTS" or "GO SEAHAWKS!" I'm yelling "GO ROBERT MUELLER and the rule of law!"
#SuperBowl2026SantaClara
#SuperBowl2026SantaClara
February 8, 2026 at 11:06 PM
While many of you are likely yelling "GO PATRIOTS" or "GO SEAHAWKS!" I'm yelling "GO ROBERT MUELLER and the rule of law!"
#SuperBowl2026SantaClara
#SuperBowl2026SantaClara
Reposted by Matt Jordan
I never noticed this either.
February 8, 2026 at 7:09 PM
I never noticed this either.
Reposted by Matt Jordan
They’ll be hearing from his father
February 7, 2026 at 2:14 AM
They’ll be hearing from his father
Vin Diesel
sort of curious who would be a *terrible* muppet show guest host. to nuke myself from orbit, i am starting with gillian anderson
janelle monáe, ke huy quan and pedro pascal
February 7, 2026 at 3:00 AM
Vin Diesel
I was worried this might happen
February 7, 2026 at 2:03 AM
I was worried this might happen
Shea Whigham
Who do you want to guest host a potential revival of The Muppet Show?
Here’s Who We Want to Guest Host ‘The Muppet Show’ If It’s Revived
February 6, 2026 at 8:40 PM
Shea Whigham
[Letterman voice] Bovino... Bongino. Bovino... Bongino.
February 6, 2026 at 7:53 PM
[Letterman voice] Bovino... Bongino. Bovino... Bongino.
Reposted by Matt Jordan
Clapping my flippers together and honking like a harbor seal when a Super Bowl ad for a condiment or gambling app featuring two celebrities unexpectedly reveals a third celebrity as its punchline. Bouncing a ball around on my snout. My wife has to throw me a herring to get me to calm down.
February 6, 2026 at 6:24 PM
Clapping my flippers together and honking like a harbor seal when a Super Bowl ad for a condiment or gambling app featuring two celebrities unexpectedly reveals a third celebrity as its punchline. Bouncing a ball around on my snout. My wife has to throw me a herring to get me to calm down.
I'm not only going to celebrate When It Happens Day that year, I'm going to make it a new holiday
A screenshot from a video posted on Trump's Truth Social account: truthsocial.com/@realDonaldT...
February 6, 2026 at 7:48 AM
I'm not only going to celebrate When It Happens Day that year, I'm going to make it a new holiday
Reposted by Matt Jordan
Where my Muzzleheads at? Drop your favorite Muzzle quote in the replies. Mine is when one of Eckhart's fellow cops asks him when "the City of Angels became hell" to which Eckhart responds "You forget, Lucifer was an angel"
Finally! Muzzle 2! I will never forget the ending to Muzzle 1 on AMC+. The people deserve a Muzzle 3!
February 5, 2026 at 8:00 PM
Where my Muzzleheads at? Drop your favorite Muzzle quote in the replies. Mine is when one of Eckhart's fellow cops asks him when "the City of Angels became hell" to which Eckhart responds "You forget, Lucifer was an angel"
Reposted by Matt Jordan
the most important takeaway from the epstein files, imo, is that it illustrates how it works when everyone involved feels a level of impunity that only the wealthiest and most powerful people in the whole world experience. and then you can extrapolate from that how it works in your local community.
February 5, 2026 at 6:26 PM
the most important takeaway from the epstein files, imo, is that it illustrates how it works when everyone involved feels a level of impunity that only the wealthiest and most powerful people in the whole world experience. and then you can extrapolate from that how it works in your local community.
Reposted by Matt Jordan
Jeff Bezos’s wealth has increased an average of $70 million every day of 2026, meaning that he could have offset The Post’s losses with what he’s made since Monday.
February 5, 2026 at 2:48 AM
Jeff Bezos’s wealth has increased an average of $70 million every day of 2026, meaning that he could have offset The Post’s losses with what he’s made since Monday.
Moby Dickheads eating good tonight
There she blows! there! there! there! she blows! she blows!
February 4, 2026 at 11:54 PM
Moby Dickheads eating good tonight
thanks for the heads up
Olandria Carthen has signed with UTA for representation across all areas.
February 4, 2026 at 11:06 PM
thanks for the heads up
love to use the internet. if you squint real hard you can see a review of the new Sam Raimi under all that stuff
February 4, 2026 at 10:59 PM
love to use the internet. if you squint real hard you can see a review of the new Sam Raimi under all that stuff
Oy, wotcher, you players ready for Prime Time then?
The first-ever cast of SNL UK has been unveiled:
• Hammed Animashaun
• Ayoade Bamgboye
• Larry Dean
• Celeste Dring
• George Fouracres
• Ania Magliano
• Annabel Marlow
• Al Nash
• Jack Shep
• Emma Sidi
• Paddy Young
• Hammed Animashaun
• Ayoade Bamgboye
• Larry Dean
• Celeste Dring
• George Fouracres
• Ania Magliano
• Annabel Marlow
• Al Nash
• Jack Shep
• Emma Sidi
• Paddy Young
February 4, 2026 at 7:43 PM
Oy, wotcher, you players ready for Prime Time then?
Reposted by Matt Jordan
The guy who owns Amazon shutting down the books section of the Washington Post is beyond parody
WaPo also closing Books section and downsizing International and Metro sections
February 4, 2026 at 2:05 PM
The guy who owns Amazon shutting down the books section of the Washington Post is beyond parody
Reposted by Matt Jordan
this literally looks like a scene from THE FIRST PURGE
Fucking surreal that people dressed like this and carrying assault rifles are permitted to kidnap people off our streets
February 4, 2026 at 2:53 AM
this literally looks like a scene from THE FIRST PURGE
Reposted by Matt Jordan
I don't know if I can adequately express my glee at this exquisite wording. I hope Judge Reyes always has a green wave when she drives, a cool pillow at night, and the most comfortable chair.
Haiti’s TPS continues for now!!!!! And zowie: https://storage.courtlistener.com/recap/gov.uscourts.dcd.283214/gov.uscourts.dcd.283214.124.0_1.pdf
February 3, 2026 at 8:04 PM
I don't know if I can adequately express my glee at this exquisite wording. I hope Judge Reyes always has a green wave when she drives, a cool pillow at night, and the most comfortable chair.